Fall to Pieces
by LadyRaider
Summary: AU. When Olivia leaves her husband after a fight where will it leave her relationship with Elliot? Will things change for better or worse? EO. Complete!
1. Chapter One

Disclaimer: well, you know by now that I don't own them, nor do I claim to. So, yeah, anyway, on with the story then.  
  
Summary: AU wherein Olivia is married with two children and Elliot is single. That's basically the only different thing 'bout it, I think.

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Olivia was tired. No, not tired, that wasn't a strong enough word. Exhausted was more like it. Olivia was exhausted. All that she wanted was to go home and sleep. Although she doubted that that was going to happen, even though home was where she was headed.  
  
Sure enough, when she pulled in front of her house she could see the living room light on. She sighed as she turned off the car, it was time for another you-work-to-much speech.  
  
She drew in a deep breath before opening the front door. Chris was dozing on the couch and woke at the sound of the door being opened.  
  
"Do you know what time it is," he demanded.  
  
"Do you?" She snapped, not wanting to argue again.  
  
"Don't get smart with me, woman--"  
  
"I hope you don't expect me to let you talk to me like that. I have a name, and I'll be damned if I let you call me woman."  
  
He sighed, "I'm sorry, Olivia. I didn't mean to snap at you like that."  
  
"I don't care if you didn't mean to, Christopher. Don't."  
  
"I'm just a little frustrated, I'm tired of explaining why mommy is never home to Cassie and Becca. There's only so many times I can hear 'daddy, why isn't mommy ever home? Doesn't she love us?', they shouldn't have to wonder if you love them, Olivia. It's painful for me to have to hear it."  
  
She sat down next to him on the couch, "I can't control my hours, Chris. You know that as well as I do."  
  
"That's different."  
  
"Oh, it is? Just how is 'that' different?"  
  
"When I'm working late it's because I'm saving a life, or more than one."  
  
"Just what the hell do you think I do everyday? Sit on my ass and watch the clock? My job is just as important as yours is."  
  
"It's late, Olivia. I have to get up and be at the hospital early, I can't get into this with you again."  
  
"And why the hell not? You started this conversation, we're damn well going to finish it."  
  
"Fine, you want to talk? Let's talk. Let's talk about how you spend 3/4th's of your day at work and the other at home sleeping, or how my wife's partner sees her more than I do. Or, how we haven't made love in over 4 months. God, Olivia, it's like you'd rather be at work than at home."  
  
"What do you expect me to do about it, Chris? I can't exactly tell the Captain 'no', he's my boss! And it's not as if I'm the only one with a family at work, I can't ask him to make an exception for me, it wouldn't be fair. As for your lack of a sex life, maybe if you weren't such a jackass all the time you'd have one!" She got up from the couch and started to walk up the stairs that lead to her bedroom, Chris stood to follow. She stopped on the top stair, "there's some blankets and pillows in the hall closet, you're sleeping on the couch." She shut the bedroom door and laid in the bed, falling asleep instantly.  
  
When she woke up the next morning she got Cassie up so she could get ready for school. Cassie smiled at her sleepily and asked her where she had been the night before.  
  
"Mommy had to work, honey."  
  
"But, why so late?"  
  
"You'll understand when you're older. I promise. You know I'd be home more if I could, right? You know mommy loves you?"  
  
"I know."  
  
"Then, can I have a hug?"  
  
Cassie smiled and gave her a hug then ran off to pick out an outfit to wear. Olivia went to make her breakfast and saw a note on the kitchen counter.  
  
'Called into work early,' it read, 'you have to drop Becca off at my moms'.  
  
Wonderful. Olivia thought. Just the person I want to see.  
  
Cassie came running down the stairs and immediately attacked her lucky charms. Olivia told her to slow down and went to wake up Rebecca. After getting Becca ready and her eating something for breakfast they got into Olivia's silver Toyota Celica and Olivia drove Cassie to school and then Becca to her mother-in-laws house. Luckily, the woman was too busy for her usual, 'women shouldn't be police officers, it's too dangerous' speech. Nevertheless, Olivia got to work 5 minutes late.  
  
"Finally," Munch exclaimed sarcastically as soon as she sat down, "we thought you'd never get here."  
  
"I'm only 5 minutes late, Munch," she replied deadpan.  
  
"Hope you've got a good reason."  
  
"Chris was called into work early, I had to drop off Cassie and Becca."  
  
Elliot looked up at that, "at your mother-in-laws?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
Elliot grimaced, "sorry." He had met her mother-in-law at Cassie's 6th birthday party the year prior. Mary had taken it upon herself to tell Elliot just what she thought of Olivia's working as a detective, and how he'd better not try anything with her baby boy's wife. Of course, Olivia had been standing close by so Mary had said it loud enough for her and many others to hear. It was a very embarrassing experience.  
  
"Well, she was too busy to bitch, so I was spared this time," she shuffled papers around on her desk, looking for something to work on, "when is the Crawford trial?"  
  
"2 o'clock."  
  
She nodded and looked down at the paperwork on her desk. She sighed and started to work on it. She could feel eyes watching her and looked up. Elliot was staring attentively.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You look stressed, are you alright?"  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine. A bit tired, frustrated."  
  
"Well, tired I understand. Why frustrated?"  
  
"Chris and I got into another fight when I came home last night, and it just appeared to me that some of what he said WAS right. I spend most of my day at work, even most of my night sometimes, when I come home I spend my time with the girls and getting what little bit of sleep I can. I'm around you more than I am around him and the girls. And maybe his job is more important."  
  
"He told you that his job was more important than yours?"  
  
"Not in so many words, but yeah, he did."  
  
"Well, not to say that his job's not important, because it is. But, come one, what we do is just as important as what he does, if not then more so."  
  
She snorted and went back to her paperwork.  
  
"You don't believe me?"  
  
She looked up at him but didn't reply.  
  
"Alright, then. Let's look at Crawford. He kidnapped and molested 3 little boys. If it wasn't for you he'd he out there now with his fourth victim. Now, I may be wrong, but that seems pretty damn important."  
  
She nodded. "Alright, what we do is important. I know that. But, is it more important than what Chris does."  
  
"Hell yes."  
  
"How?"  
  
"We help people by getting these…monsters off the streets. Keep them from hurting anybody else. What he does is helping, yes, but that's after something has already happened to them."  
  
"Most of the time he keeps it from happening again."  
  
Elliot sat back in his chair and sighed, "it seems to me you've already made your mind up. You think that he, as a doctor, is more important than you, as a detective."  
  
"I don't know if that's it. Maybe, on some level I want him to be right. Like a reason to justify all the fights. I don't know, El. Maybe I should talk to Huang about it. Get some professional insight."  
  
"Maybe. But, maybe you should talk to Chris about it. That might help a little bit.  
  
"I guess you're right."  
  
"Of course I'm right, now stop bugging me and get back to work."  
  
She smiled and went back to her paperwork. At 1:30 she and Elliot got their things together and went to the courthouse where Crawford was having his trial.  
  
The trial went by easily for the prosecution. Alex had more than enough evidence to prove Crawford's guilt, and she did. It only took the jury half an hour to deliberate and come back with a guilty verdict.  
  
"See what I mean," Elliot said when they left the courthouse, "if it wasn't for you he wouldn't be doing 25 to life, you just prevented a number of boys from being future victims of that guy."  
  
She nodded and looked at her watch, "I should be getting home, it's after 6. Don't want another argument. I'll see you tomorrow."  
  
"Alright. Bye, Liv."  
  
"Bye, Elliot."

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a/n: so there it is, hopefully you like it so far and will review and continue to read as I continue to post. Anyway, let me know.


	2. Chapter Two

Fall to Pieces:

Chapter Two

Disclaimer: Yeah, yeah, I know...they're not mine.

Summary:

My characters: Yeah...I have original characters (they're mine disclaimer people, stay away!) Here they are:

Chris: Olivia's husband, a well-known doctor. Married to her for 8 years.

Cassandra: Olivia's first born, 7 years of age.

Rebecca: Olivia's second daughter, 3 years of age.

Mary: Olivia's mother-in-law, doesn't like Olivia's job or her partner. Chris is her only son. She's divorced.

That's it guys, but, they're mine! Yea!

It was nearing seven when Olivia's car pulled into the driveway. Her husband's black SUV was missing, however, and her mother-in-laws Malibu took its place. Olivia briefly considered pulling out of the driveway and speeding off in the other direction, but, she rarely got home at such an early hour and wanted to spend the rest of the beautiful day with her daughters, playing in the small inflatable pool in their backyard.

Becca came running towards her as soon as she walked into the door, and Olivia scooped her youngest baby into her arms, giving her a big kiss. "Hey, honey. You wanna go swimming?"  
  
The young girl nodded furiously, "I can swim!"

"Yes, I know. You showed me the other week, remember?"  
  
She nodded her head again, "let's go!" She wriggled her way out of her mothers arms and onto the hardwood floor and ran towards the back door.

"Wait a second, missy. You've gotta get your bathing suit on first. And where's your sister?"

"With Gamma."

"Where?"  
  
"Her woom."

"It's room, Becca."  
  
"Right, woom."

Olivia just smiled, "well, don't you think we should see if she wants to swim?"

She frowned, but nodded her head anyway. The two took off down the hallway to Cassandra's room, the door was opened slightly and Mary's voice could be clearly heard as she scolded her granddaughter."No, no, no. 7 3 is not 73, Cassandra. If I have 7 pieces of candy and you give me 3 pieces of candy, how many pieces of candy do I have?"  
  
"I wouldn't give you my candy though, grandma."

Olivia held back a snicker and pushed the door open the rest of the way, Cassie's eyes lit up when she saw her mother and she ran into her arms as well, squeezing her mother's hips tightly. "Momma! When did you get home?"

"Not long ago, Cassie. Becca and I wanted to know if you wanted to go swimming."  
  
"She can't," Mary said as a matter-of-factly, "she's not done with her lessons."

"I'm sorry Mary, since when are you her mother?" She smirked at the look Mary gave her, "Cassie can finish her homework later, right now we are going to take full advantage of this beautiful cloudless day and go swimming in the back yard. You can go home now."

"My son will be hearing of this."  
  
"Your son cannot tell me how to raise my own children, Mary, and neither can you. Now, if Chris has a problem with Cassie doing her homework later on in the evening then he and I will have a discussion on that. Other than that I see no problem with her doing it later as long as it gets done. You can leave no, Mary."

Mary grumbled something and went out the room and into the living room. A few seconds later the door opened and then shut and a car started.

_Thank God she's gone,_ Olivia thought. She smiled down at her first born, "get your suit on, I'll help Bec with hers and then get mine on. Wait for me to go outside with me, ok?"  
  
"Ok, momma."

After getting their bathing suits on they went into the backyard and Olivia took the cover off of the small pool, the water wasn't too cold, but it wasn't warm either. They splashed in it for awhile until the sun began to go down and the sky started turning orange. The ventured back into the house and Cassie took a shower in the bathroom her and her sister shared while Becca and her mother showered together. When they were all clean it was almost 8 o'clock. Olivia put Becca to bed and helped Cassie with her math homework.

"Grandma's mean."  
  
She was tempted to reply with an "I know" but she decided against it, "she just wants you to understand, honey. Math is very important, and you'll be learning about it for years to come. She just wants to help."

"Will you help?"

"Of course."  
  
"Ok...what's 7 3?"  
  
Olivia smiled at her daughters tactics, "uh-uh, you've gotta do it on your own. I'm only here to help a little. Here how about this," she looked around the room and her eyes settled on a bag of skittles. She grabbed them and dumped some of them into her hand. "Ok, here we are," she picked out 7 skittles of various colors, "ok, I have 7 skittles. But, then I get 3 more," she picked out three more skittles, "now how many do I have?"  
  
Cassie thought it over for a second and then grabbed the skittles out of her mothers hand and began to count them. "10!" She cried when she'd finished the task.

"Good job." Cassie beamed at the compliment. "Ok, Cass. Next problem is...10-4." She demonstrated with the skittles once again and Cassie once again counted how many she had left in her hand."6!"

20 minutes after 8 Cassie's homework was finished and Olivia tucked her into bed. "Mommy," she said, her brown eyes shinning, "will you be home tomorrow night too?"

Olivia was taken aback, she should have but she hadn't expected that question. "Oh...I don't know, honey. Maybe...maybe not. It all depends on my work."  
  
She frowned, "will daddy be home?"  
  
"I really don't know...where is your father anyway?"  
  
"Working."

"Oh."  
  
"Why do you and daddy work so much?"  
  
"Because, honey, that's the way things are. I can't change work and neither can your father. It's just a part of being a grown up. You'll understand when you're my age and have a little girl of your own."

She smiled and hugged her mother, "goodnight, momma."  
  
"Goodnight, sweetheart. Sweet dreams."

Olivia had fallen asleep on the couch somewhere after the beginning of The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and Late Night with Connan O'Brian, because when she woke up the quirky red-head was chatting with some famous actress with big boobs, names escaped her. At first she wondered why she had woken, but when the door opened and Chris stepped inside she realized the headlights from his SUV had roused her. She ran a hand through her unruly hair, "how was work?"  
  
"Huh? Oh...fine." She noticed a slight slur in his voice and her suspicion grew when he bumped into the coffee table and nearly toppled over. He started humming the tune to a song that either she couldn't place or didn't, never heard, or didn't exist.

"Chris!" She barked.

He turned around, his eyes searching for her. "What?"

"You're drunk."  
  
"No! I'm jussss tired s'all. Been workin' alll day. Summin you..." he pointed his finger at her and then looked at it like he'd never seen one before. He cocked his head to the side and studied the strange limb."Something what, Chris???"

He jerked back into reality, "huh?"

"Chris...where have you been?"  
  
"The hospa....hospi...hospo...work."

"Where have you been Chris? And tell me the truth, 'cos I know you've not been working."

He looked down at his feet, "O'Mallys."

"How many?"

"Wha??"

"How many drinks?"  
  
"8 or 9...maybe 10. Yeah...10."  
  
"Damn it, Chris. You're sleeping on the couch again."

"NO!" He shouted."Shut-up or you'll wake the girls!" She scolded. "This is the what...third time you've come home drunk? What happened?"

"Jim and I...had fun."

She got up off the couch and started to walk back to her room.

"Hey, come back here woman!"

She quickly walked up to him, "I told you never to call me that, Chris. You very well may be stupid, but you're not dumb. My mother did not name me woman, she named me Olivia."  
  
"You're mother..." he paused as if thinking things over, "was a...drunken whore."

She didn't realize she had hit him until she felt her palm stinging. "Well, you're not that much different, now are you?" She hissed, "coming home at 2 in the morning drunk and yelling with your two daughters sleeping down the hall."

His hand immediately went to the spot where she had hit him, and his eyes flashed and Olivia recognized the look. She didn't have time to react as his fist collided with her face. The second time he moved to strike her she was ready and grabbed his hand, twisting it in a painful matter. He cried out.

"Bitch," he yelled at her.

"I may be a bitch, but I'm one bitch that you will never lay a hand on again." She let go of his arm and he fell backwards onto his ass. She snorted at him as he tried (and failed) to get up. Nursing her sore jaw she ran towards the girls rooms and quickly got each of them up. After grabbing a few things for them to wear, and Cassie's book bag she left through the garage. Chris stumbled out of the house as she pulled out of the driveway and began to yell choice words as her as she drove off. Becca had already fallen back asleep, but Cassie sat in the backseat quietly crying. At the first gas station she came to she pulled over and pulled Cassie into the front seat and her arms."It's ok, Cassie. Don't cry." She whispered into her daughter hair as she held her close, "I promise, everything's going to be ok."

It wasn't long until Cassie had cried herself to sleep and Olivia put her into the backseat. Not knowing were else she could go she drove to the one place she knew would always be open to her, her partners apartment.

a/n: anyway, I was kinda tired of the "cheating" spouses. So, I just made a jackass one. I didn't intend on Olivia and Chris lasting long anyway. Let me know what you think.


	3. Chapter Three

Fall to Pieces:  
Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Must you rub it in my face, they're not mine, they're happy now?

It was almost 3 when she pulled in front of the building he lived in. It was pitch black and she scanned the area for any moving figures, just to be safe. Thankful she had left her gun and badge in the car the day before she grabbed them and turned around in her seat. "Cassie...honey, wake up."

Cassie's eyes opened and she rubbed the sleep out of them, "what is it, momma?"

"Honey, we're at Ellie's apartment, I need you to get your book bag for me, ok? I've gotta carry your sister."

She nodded and fumbled around in the backseat until she had her book bag in her hands. "I got it, mommy."

"Good." She shut the car off and got out, quickly retrieving Becca from the back seat and grabbing the bag that held their clothes. Cassie held on to her book bag like it was the most important thing in the world and crawled over the seat to get out of the door closest to the sidewalk. She grabbed her mothers hand and Olivia shut the car door behind her.

It took a few minutes of waiting after she pressed the buzzer for Elliot's voice to come over the intercom. "Who's there?"  
  
"Elliot. It's me. Let me in."

The door clicked and she opened it and headed for the elevator. Even though he only lived on the 2nd floor she wasn't going to take her chances carrying Becca up the stairs. She didn't even have to knock on his door when she made it to his apartment, he was already there waiting.

Cassie ran up to him, "Ellie!" He picked her up and she hugged him. He carried her inside and Olivia did the same with Becca. She put her into the guestroom and went back into the living room where she found Cassie talking a mile a minute.

"I heard yelling, mommy came into my room and told me to--"

"Cassie, how about we get you into bed with your sister, huh? Don't want you to be too tired tomorrow at school, do we? You have a big math test, don't you?"  
  
"Yes, mommy."

"Ok, come on." She took her into the room and tucked her into bed with her sister. "Sweet dreams, baby. I'll see you in the morning." She kissed her daughter on the forehead and went back into the living room where she saw Elliot waiting with a beer in hand, he offered it to her.

"No, I don't want it." She said bitterly.

"What happened, Liv?"  
  
"I'm not even sure. It was just one big blur, one horribly loud blur.""Tell me."  
  
"I fell asleep on the couch watching TV, when he came home the headlights of his car woke me and when he stumbled into the house I knew he was drunk. He was slurring and bumping into things barely keeping his composure. It was pathetic. We yelled at each other for a while, he brought mom up, his favorite insult. I slapped him, he got pissed and punched me--"

"He what?!?" Elliot said, standing up.

"Sit down, I'm not finished." She scolded him, he sat down against his own accord and let her finish. "He went to hit me again and I twisted his arm, trust me I hurt him a lot more than he hurt me. There was more yelling, and I told him that he'd never get the chance to hit me again, I woke the girls up and we left."

"Has he ever hit you before," he asked his eyes burning with anger.

"No, we've fought before, but he never hit me. He was drunk out of his mind, trust me, if he had ever hit me before I would've left him right away."  
  
"Where did he hit you?"  
  
"My jaw got the brunt of it. It's a little sore, but I'll be fine."  
  
He got up and sat next to her, examining her face. "Damn it, Olivia, you've already got a bruise. How many times has he come home drunk?"

"A few...I always make him sleep on the couch. He always goes out with the same guy, Jim, they work together. I wonder how his wife reacts."

He pressed lightly on the bruise and she pulled back wincing.

"That bastard." Elliot said to himself, "you can't let him get away with it Liv."  
  
"I'm not going to, Elliot. But, you can't take matters into your own hands, promise me you won't do anything. I'm going to handle this."

"Liv..."

"No. Elliot, he may be an asshole, but his the father of my children. I won't let you hurt him."

"You can't be serious."

She snorted, "you think that I don't want you to hurt him because I don't want him hurt? I don't want my children hurt, Elliot. He's still their father, no matter what they're going to love him, they're too young to understand this. If he gets hurt they'll be devastated. If it wasn't for them I would have done a lot more than twist his arm a little. Promise me you won't go after him...not for him, for Becca and Cassie."

He sighed, "alright. You're pressing charges, right?"  
  
She nodded.  
  
"Let me bring him in."  
  
She shook her head, "no. That I'm going to do."

His eyes traveled to the bruise once more, "does it hurt?"  
  
"Not too bad. It'll be fine...I've been hurt worse. Thank you for letting me stay."  
  
"I would never tell you to leave. What are you going to do about Becca and Cassie? You can't take them to Mary's house, she'd call Chris."

She nodded, "Cassie has a friend at school, her name is Maia I think. Her mother has a son around Becca's age and Cassie has stayed over her house a few times...I'm going to call her later in the morning and ask if her Becca can stay with her while I'm at work, and if Cassie can come home with her after school."  
  
"What if Chris tries to pick up Cassie from school?"  
  
"I'm going to leave a note in the office telling them not to let her near Cassie. And, hopefully he'll be in jail by the time she gets out. Now I don't expect him to stay long, he's got a great defense attorney, but I'm going to get an order of protection for me and the girls...that way if he tries to come near us he'll go back."  
  
"You going to divorce him?"  
  
She nodded, "I would never stay with somebody who hit me. We've seen to many women like that, the kind that forgive their husbands for hurting them, only to get hurt again. I'm not going to be a battered wife. He knows that I never would be. He made his choice when he hit me."

"You should get some sleep...you can take my room, I'll sleep on the couch."  
  
"No, that's alright. I'm going to sleep with the girls."

"You sure?"  
  
"Yeah. Goodnight, Elliot. And thank you."  
  
"No problem...you can stay as long as you need to. Goodnight."

They went in separate directions Elliot to his room and Olivia to the guest bed where she crawled in between her two daughters who instantly snuggled up to their mother. She smiled slightly and kissed each of them on the forehead before settling into bed and falling asleep.

a/n: wow, thanks for all the reviews. You guys are great. Don't worry, Chris will get his from Elliot, although it won't be physical! I'm sorry, I just don't want Elliot to get into trouble!! Let me know what you think.


	4. Chapter Four

Fall To Pieces

Chapter Four

Disclaimer: They're not mine? That's news to me. But, hey...if you say so.

Olivia woke to a pair of chocolate brown eyes staring down at her, she jumped slightly, then smiled at her youngest daughter. "Becca...how long have you been awake?"  
  
Becca backed away from her face, sat on top of her legs, and shrugged. "Dunno...Cas snoring."

Olivia turned her head toward Cassandra, Becca was right, she was snoring ever so lightly. She smiled to herself and turned towards the alarm clock. It was only 5:36 in the morning, Cassie wouldn't have to be up for more than an hour. She sighed and rolled away from her first born and climbed out of bed. Becca followed her as she made her way into the kitchen and started up a pot of coffee. She looked around the room, not even Elliot was up yet. She'd have to get Becca out of this bad habit.

"Momma..." Becca wined at her legs, "I hungry."

"Well. Just let me see if I can find you something, all right?" She began searching through fridge and found nothing suited for a 3 year old, there was milk but it had long since gone sour. There was a box of lucky charms that had already gone stale, and she wasn't sure her daughter would appreciate a bag of sunflower seeds for breakfast. "Well, if this isn't a bachelor pad I don't know what it is," she sighed to herself.

"That's because I'm a bachelor." Elliot said as a matter-of-factly, causing her to jump slightly and hit her head on the top of the fridge.

She pulled out of the fridge, "God, Elliot. Give me a heart attack why don't 'cha."

"You figured me out."

"How do you live? There's nothing in the fridge except beer and sunflower seeds."  
  
"Well...I drink beer and eat sunflower seeds."

"Very funny."

"Get the kids ready, I'll take you guys out for breakfast."  
  
"It's only 10 till six."

"So, they're young, Becca's already awake."  
  
"Cassie barely got any sleep last night, El. Bec sleeps like a log, never once wakes up during the middle of the night, but Cassie...she's such a light sleeper."

He shrugged, "she'll be fine."  
  
"Boy, you can tell you don't have any kids. Fine, I'll wake her up...but, if she's grouchy then I'll blame it on you." Olivia went back into the guest room and gently woke up Cassandra, who looked at her sleepily, but smiled anyway. "Hey, honey, you wanna go out and get some breakfast?"  
  
She nodded and rubbed her eyes with her fists, "what time is it?"

"Almost 6 o'clock. Ellie is going to take us out for breakfast, then I'm going to take you to school. Is that all right with you? I mean, will you be able to focus on school being a little bit sleepy?"

"Yes, mommy."

"Ok, let's get you into some school clothes, then. What'cha think?"

Olivia got Cassie dressed and while Elliot watched her Becca and Olivia dressed. When they were all ready to go they piled into Elliot's car and they drove to a small mom and pop diner called "Nick's". While the two children ate pancakes Olivia had scrambled eggs and toast, and Elliot got the same as the children, except instead of chocolate chip pancakes his were buttermilk.

When they were dropping Cassie off at school Olivia noticed Heather's van pull in front of them. She told Elliot to wait for a second and got out, running up to where the Green van was parked. Heather was wishing Maia a good day at school when Olivia came up to the side of the van.

"Heather...can we talk?"

The blonde looked to her confused, "Olivia? Hi. Sure. What do you need?"  
  
"I was hoping you could do me a huge, huge favor."

"What is it?"  
  
"Could you watch Rebecca while I'm at work. Normally, Chris' mother would watch her, but, um...something has come up."  
  
Heather seemed to understand, maybe it was the giant bluish-purple bruise on her jaw, "I would love to, Becca is such a sweet girl, Robbie hardly ever has anybody his age to play with, I'm sure he'd love the company. Do you need somebody to watch Cassie while you're working as well? I could pick her up after school, if that's alright with you."  
  
"That would be wonderful. I've already sent a note with Cassie saying that neither Chris nor I will be picking her up today...and if Chris is to come, not to sign her out to him. I don't know how to thank you."  
  
"You don't have to, it's my pleasure."

"I guess I'll just follow you to your home then."  
  
"Ok."

Olivia ran back to the car and told Elliot to follow Heather to her home and told Becca that she would be spending the day with Robbie, whom she had met once before. Becca didn't seem too thrilled at spending the day with a boy (who according to her had cooties), but didn't protest much. It seemed that she would have a much better time with a yucky boy than a mean old grandma. Olivia understood.

After dropping her off at Heather's Elliot and Olivia took off for work.  
  
"You said you slapped him first?"

Olivia grimaced, "I know. Guess that was a wrong move, huh?"  
  
"Well...if he's been prone to violent outburst before, even without the physical aspect, an order of protect could still be issued, if you fear for your life and that of your children. I'm sure we know plenty of judges who would love to help out."  
  
"But no arresting. I know. I wish I could though."  
  
"You and me both."

She looked over at him and smiled sadly, "thanks for letting us stay last night, El. I didn't know where else to go, I really don't have much of a family, and what I do have are in-laws that I could care less about. I would have gone to Alex's apartment if she didn't live so much farther away."  
  
"Don't worry about it, I'm happy to have you. As long as you need to stay, I've got a room for you."

She placed her hand over his and gave it a gentle squeeze, "you're such a great friend."

He smiled smugly, "I know."

She laughed at his attempt of humor, "don't let your ego swell too much, your head might not be able to contain it."

"Ha ha. Very funny," he said his voice dripping with sarcasm.  
  
"I thought so," she said with a grin.

He stuck his tongue out at her.

"Oh, that's mature," she chided.

"I know."

They pulled in front of the station house just as Olivia's phone rang, she looked down at the caller ID and instantly pressed ignore when she saw who was on the other end.

"Chris?"  
  
"Who else."

Elliot shrugged and took the keys out of the ignition. "Can't really tell you what to do about that except either ignore him or talk to him. If you choose the former, he'll keep calling, the latter, maybe not. Depends on how mean you are."

"Like that'll make any difference."  
  
"You never know."  
  
Her phone rang again and after checking the caller ID she pressed ignore. "Maybe I'll talk to him later, right now, it's time to work."

a/n: I promise the next chapter there will be some conflict between Chris, Elliot, and Olivia. Who knows, I might even through Fin and Munch into the mix...and Mary (for that review that requested some Mary & Munch conflict...good idea...) anyway...let me know what'cha think.


	5. Chapter Five

Fall to Pieces

Chapter Four

Disclaimer: We've done this before, remember?

Authors Note: Ok, I was asked where Elliot's kids disappeared to. I guess I forgot to mention that because Olivia's married with kids in this one, Elliot isn't. So, the roles are sort of reversed. Elliot is the single one, Olivia's the one who's attached with rugrats.

"So? O'Mally's?" Munch asked getting up from his desk.

Elliot and Olivia shared a look, she shrugged, "sure. Why not? Let me call Heather, see if it's ok."  
  
Fin stood up, much like his partner, "who's Heather?"  
  
"A friend, she's watching the girls."  
  
"What happened to Mary?" Munch asked looking over the rim of his glasses.  
  
She shrugged again, "busy."  
  
"Chris?" Fin inquired, Olivia felt like she was being tag-teamed.

"Working," so what, she lied. They didn't have to know all her problems. She made the call and Heather said that it was fine, she thought of ordering pizza for the girls and her son anyway. Olivia told her she would pay her for watching them, and buying them dinner, but Heather refused, saying that it was her pleasure. Olivia guessed she enjoyed the company, since her husband was a pilot and always flying.

They headed off to the bar, Elliot and Olivia in his car, Fin and Munch in Fin's car. Olivia checked her voice mail while they drove; a sour expression on her face, dirty messages filled her machine. What could she have seen in such a horrible man? That was simple, he hadn't been horrible when they met. But, so was the case with most battered wives, the honeymoon like appearance of dating drew them into marriage, then in the minds of their husbands, they owned their wives...and could do whatever they wanted. With Chris it wasn't physical, he liked to get drunk and yell, not that that was any better. But, if he had ever raised a hand to her before she would have left, he knew that, she wondered why he had that time. He wasn't THAT drunk that he would forget something like that, maybe he just wanted an excuse out of their marriage.

"What'cha thinking about?" Elliot asked bringing her out of her thoughts. She stopped listening to her messages prematurely and looked over at him.

"I was wondering why he hit me."  
  
"That's easy, he's an drunken ass." He replied nonchalantly."He's been drunk before and never once hit me, never once even made a move to. He knew better than that. I'd seen him much more drunk then he was last night. He always been sober enough to keep his voice down enough that the girls wouldn't wake and know not to raise his hand to me," she laughed bitterly. "Maybe he upset because he wasn't getting any."  
  
Elliot's eyebrows raised and a smile tugged at the corner of his lips, "he must have really been pissing you off."She gave a slight nod of the head, "he kept getting drunk more and more. He was always sleeping on the couch." The car pulled in front of the bar and Olivia could see Fin's car out of the rearview mirror. The two got out, and a few seconds later so did Munch and Fin. They met at the door and walked inside together, following their little tradition.They talked of previous cases, past cases, Munch's lack of a sex-life, Elliot's lack of a sex-life, Fin boasting of his surplus of a sex-life, all the while Olivia kept quiet. This didn't go unnoticed by Munch, who, when Fin finally shut up took the opportunity to ask her about Chris. "How's married life?"

She only snorted and took a sip of her beer, which she had been nurturing the whole night, she had limited herself to only one.

"I take it not so well?"She flashed a forced smile, "things happen."  
  
This caught Fin's attention, "what sort of things?""It's nothing."He wouldn't let it drop, "it seems like something to me."

She sighed and opened her mouth to say something, but closed it again when she saw an unfriendly face walk into the bar and make his way to where they were sitting. She turned in her seat, facing away from the door and towards Elliot, who had also noticed Chris walk in. Munch and Fin, who sat to her left, nearest to the door, hadn't.

'Why me,' she mouthed, her eyes closed in frustration. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes again, Elliot was staring intensely at something, or somebody, behind her. It didn't take a rocket scientist to know who it was he was looking at with such hatred. Although she didn't want to, she turned in her seat, facing her husband.  
  
"What do you want?"

He looked at her with fury dancing in his eyes, "where are my children?"

"MY children are not here."

Fin and Munch looked at each other with confusion, then at Elliot. Olivia couldn't see what his response was to their questioning gaze, but it must have not have been good, because their looks changed from confused to the same intense hatred that Elliot's eyes harbored.

Chris seemed to feel the hate coming from the three males, and his wife, because his demeanor seemed to shrink a bit. "I want to see them."

"I can't let you do that."  
  
"You can't tell me that I can't see my children."  
  
"I can't...that's true. But a judge sure can."  
  
"You wouldn't do that."  
  
"Yes, I would."

"You don't have enough evidence to get an order of protection against me."  
  
"I have friends in high places. One of them will grant me one, seeing as you're an abusive drunk."His eyes narrowed.  
  
"Yeah, Chris...I'd bring it up. It only takes for you to have hit me once, and a nice bruise, which I have," she pointed to her jaw, "see that? Yeah...there are pictures of it too. All I have to tell the judge is that I'm afraid for my children. Who knows whom you'll hit then next time you come home smashed. It sure as hell won't be me, and I'll be damned if it's them."

"You stupid bitch, I won't let you get away wit--"

Olivia could hear Elliot step off of his chair behind her, and she could see Fin and Munch get out of their chairs. Chris seemed to regret his statement, but kept on.

"What? You're friends gonna beat me up? I'd love to see that happen...what is it Olivia, are you too afraid to hit me yourself?"

Olivia raised an eyebrow, "how's the arm?"

He pursed his lips together. "I won't let you take my children away from me."  
  
"I'm not taking them away from you, Chris. You already took them away from you. Don't blame me for you idiot mistakes and drinking habits."

Munch, Fin, and Elliot were still standing, Olivia wished they would sit down. They were just making fools out of themselves, Chris wasn't dumb enough to do anything when they were around. She turned and looked behind her and mouthed the word 'sit' to Elliot. He looked at her confused for a second but when Olivia's look turned stern he sat. By the time Olivia turned back around both Fin and Munch had sat down too.

"You should probably leave, Chris."  
  
"I have every right to be here."  
  
She rolled her eyes, "of course you do. I'm leaving then." Without turning to Elliot to tell him to come with she left. She could hear him get out of his seat when she made it to the door and turned around. Elliot and Chris were having an intense staring match, Elliot being a good 2 inches taller than Chris seemed to hover of him. Olivia could hear Elliot talking.

"If you ever touch her again," he growled, "I'll kill you myself."

"Is that a threat?" Chris asked as cocky as ever.  
  
"You bet your ass that's a threat." He walked away from Chris and towards Olivia, who was still waiting at the door. He pushed the door open and guided her out of the bar with a hand on the small of her back. Olivia turned back to see if Chris was watching them leave, he was.

They got into Elliot's car and Olivia began to direct him to Heather's apartment.  
  
Elliot smiled at something.

"What?"  
  
"Just thinking about what Fin and Munch are doing..."

"Probably scaring the hell out of him, like you probably did."

"You think?"  
  
"Chris doesn't like you in the first place, Elliot. He doesn't admit it, but I know he's afraid of you. With you threatening him like that, I don't know he kept from shaking," she smiled herself. "As long as they don't start up a fight, I don't care what they do."  
  
"You still don't want him hurt?" He asked, surprise in his voice.  
  
"I don't give a damn what happens to him, I care about Munch and Fin, and my children. I don't want them to go to jail...and I don't want my children to see their father hurt, even if he is a bastard. They don't know that. They're too young to understand."

"A lucky bastard is more like it," he huffed.

"Huh?"

"Well...let's look at his life. He married a wonderful woman, had two beautiful children, is a doctor who makes a ton of money, and even though he drinks and hit his wife she still doesn't want him hurt."  
  
"Not for his sake."  
  
"But still, he's damn lucky."  
  
"He won't be when I get through with him."

They pulled in front of the apartment complex that Heather lived in, "how so?"  
  
"Well...he won't have that 'wonderful woman' anymore, that's for sure, and those 'beautiful children'...not until he sobers up and stays that way. Now, I really don't give a damn about his money, but I'd like to keep our house, the girls love it at that house, I couldn't take them away from it."

"When you gonna file?""As soon as I can get some time off to go do it."

They knocked on the apartment door and Heather answered it, carrying her son in her arms, who had already fallen asleep.

"Oh, hi Olivia. I was just putting Robbie to bed. Come on in, Becca's fallen asleep on the couch, Cassie and Maia are doing homework in Maia's room. It's the first door on the left when you go down the hallway." She disappeared down the same hallway she was talking about and turned towards the right.

Olivia followed and knocked on the door that had 'Maia's room' on it. A little girl 7 years of age, bright blonde hair and dark green eyes answered. She looked over her shoulder, "Cass, you're mom's here!"

Cassie came up behind her and smiled at her mother, "let me get my stuff." She disappeared back into the room and moments later reappeared with a book bag slung over her shoulder haphazardly. "Ready." She told her mother.

"Alright, let me go wake Becca up then we'll go." She went into the living room and found her daughter asleep on the sofa like Heather had said. She bent down by the couch and gently shoot her awake. "Becca...wake up."

The young girl opened her eyelids to produce sleepy dark brown eyes, "momma?"

"Yes, honey, it's momma. Come on, we're going back to Ellie's."

"Daddy go?""No honey," she said picking her up and cradling her in her arms, "daddy won't be there."

a/n: sorry it took so long, I've been practicing for powderpuff, which I should really go get ready now...hope you liked it.


	6. Chapter Six

Fall to Pieces

Chapter Six

Disclaimer: Who says they're not mine?!?!? Oh...Dick Wolf. Ok...if he says so.

* * *

After tucking both Becca and Cassie into bed Olivia went back into the living room, where Elliot was waiting with a cup of coffee. She took it thankfully and sat down on the sofa, he sat down next to her. Neither of them spoke for a few minutes, each sipping their hot coffee carefully. Finally, Olivia broke the silence.  
  
"Thanks."  
  
He looked at her through confused eyes, "for what?"  
  
"I don't know...everything I guess. Letting us stay, what you did at the bar, everything."  
  
"I already told you that you don't have to thank me, Liv. You're my friend, my best friend. I'm just doing what any good friend would do."  
  
"No, you're not. Not many people would open their home to a woman and her two children, they'd think it was too much of a burden. That it wasn't their problem, you know that as well as I do."  
  
"You're my partner, Liv. I'd do anything for you. And I love the girls, I would do anything for them too."  
  
"I know, that's why I wanted to thank you."  
  
"Well, you're welcome then." He flashed a wide grin; "you should probably get to bed. I'm sure you're tired."  
  
"Yeah," a yawn escaped, "I guess you're right. I'll see you in the morning."  
  
"Are the girls going back to Heather's?"  
  
"Yeah, she said as long as I need a place to bring them, she's got a place for them to go. I'm going to pay her tomorrow, no matter what she says." She yawned again, "goodnight, Elliot."  
  
"G'night, Liv."

* * *

After dropping the Cassie off at school and Becca at Heather's Elliot and Olivia headed for work, where they stayed a total of 12 minutes before going off on another case. A 23-year-old girl, Morgan Vickers, was found raped, beaten, and murdered in the back alleyway of a local bar. The two traveled to the crime scene and looked around, then after leaving everything in the capable hands of the CSU went to see M.E. Warner.  
  
She was waiting for them in the morgue. "The cause of death was asphyxiation."  
  
"But she wasn't strangled? What then...suffocation, drowning?"  
  
"My best guess, suffocation. But, she definitely asphyxiated," she lifted up the young woman's eyelids, "see those purplish-red spots? That's petechial hemorrhaging."  
  
"What else can you tell us?"  
  
"Well, she was a fighter. We found skin under her fingernails. No fluids though, your guy used a condom. Other than she has a few fresh bruises, most likely from her rape and struggle, nothing."  
  
"Ok, thanks." The two left for Morgan's parent's home.  
  
An older woman, presumably Morgan's mother, answered the door. "Can I do something for you two?"  
  
"Are you Mrs. Vickers?"  
  
"Not anymore...my husband died 5 years ago, I recently remarried."  
  
Olivia nodded, "are you the mother of Morgan Vickers?"  
  
She looked down, "yes I am. I've already identified her body, are you investigating her case?"  
  
"Yes ma'am we are. Could we talk with you?"  
  
"Sure, but I don't know how much help I can be. I hadn't spoken with my daughter in over a year. We had a falling out when I remarried. She wouldn't speak to me, didn't even come to my wedding." She stepped back, out of the doorway, and sighed, "but you're welcome to come in."  
  
They didn't end up staying long; Mrs. Eaten (her new husbands last name) hadn't been exaggerating when she said she hadn't spoken to her daughter in awhile. When Morgan moved into a new apartment she hadn't given her the new address or number. Mrs. Eaten didn't get a mother's day card, birthday card, or Christmas card. Her daughter had shut her out of her life. So, they went to the next place on the list, her job.  
  
Her boss, a Mr. Yhates, didn't seem very upset over losing an employee. "Morgan only worked for me for a little less than a year, she had just gotten out of college when she started, she was a little green. Became close with another girl, though, around her age, Jessica Arnold; she's worked for me for about two years. If anybody knows anything, it's her." He directed her to the area that Jessica worked.  
  
"She had a date," Jessica said nonchalantly, "with a guy...Tim Reed, it was a blind date. She was apprehensive about it, had never been on one before. I told her not to go who knew what kind of guy he was. But, one of her friends from school knew him, she said that if she thought that he was ok, then he must be."  
  
"Do you know how we can get in touch with this man?"  
  
"Uh...Morgan kept a date book here at work, in her desk. It might have his information in it; I don't know anything about him. And, if it's not in there, I think that she said the girl who set the date up was Misty Jackson, she went to NYU with her last year. Drama major...obviously so was Tim, which sent up a red flag for me. Guess Morgan choose to ignore it."  
  
"Thank you Ms. Arnold," Elliot handed her his card, "if you remember anything else, call us."  
  
She took it, "will do."  
  
They had found the date book, and while Tim's information wasn't included in it, however, Misty Jackson's was. They set off to talk with her, she informed them that Tim had told her that Morgan hadn't shown up for the date, and Tim had been very pissed about it. He had told her he would get Morgan for setting him up. She said it had scared her, so she gave them his address, home phone, and cell number and they thanked her, then left to find Tim Reed.  
  
Turns out he was at home, and when the two asked if he would mind talking to them about what had happened with his date he got upset at them and slammed the door.  
  
"Well, he was real friendly." Olivia snorted as she got into the passenger's seat of the sedan.  
  
"We'll see if he has a record. If he does, maybe we can get a warrant for his DNA."  
  
Luckily for them, he had a record. One prior for sexual assault. A judge had granted them a warrant to get his DNA, and they brought him in. After testing his DNA to that which was found under Morgan's fingernails, it was a match. After a few intense hours of interrogation he faltered and confessed.  
  
"Why can't they all be that easy?" Olivia asked as she sat down to begin her paperwork.  
  
Elliot just shrugged and, like Olivia, began his paperwork.

* * *

After leaving work Olivia and Elliot went to get the girls. Since it was still early they decided to go out for something to eat. They asked the girls what they wanted, both exclaimed that they wanted McDonalds. Olivia looked over at Elliot who shrugged.  
  
"Hey, you asked them."  
  
She smiled and turned around to face the girls in the backseat, "all right, Mickey D's it is."  
  
The four sat down at a table/booth and ate their dinners. The girls seemed a little more interested in their Barbie toys than their happy meals, so Olivia took them away and told them that until they finished eating no toys. They frowned but obeyed, eating quickly.  
  
Elliot looked on with a smile, "hey, guys, how 'bout slowing down just a bit. We don't want you getting tummy aches now, do we?"  
  
The two looked up at him, blank expressions on their faces.  
  
"Listen to him," their mother warned, "he's right."  
  
"Ok, mamma." Becky said, the two began to eat again, yet slower. When they were done the asked if they could go and play in the indoor playground. Olivia said yes and they threw their trash away and walked into the other room, which held the large playground. The girls ran off and Olivia and Elliot sat at another table and watched them.  
  
Olivia smiled and looked at Elliot, "you know, I never understood why you never had any kids."  
  
"That's easy, I never got married."  
  
"Ok, good answer. But, I never knew why you didn't get married either."  
  
"I just never found the right person. I was engaged at one point, but it just didn't feel right, so I broke it off. Then, work got a hold of me. I've of become married to that...it's a curse."  
  
"Sounds reasonable. I mean, working didn't do a lot to help me out in the marriage department. But then again, neither did marriage itself." She shrugged, "Maybe I've caught whatever it is Munch has."  
  
Elliot smiled, "I don't think that's it, Liv. And I don't think that you think that's it, either."  
  
She threw him a half-annoyed, half-joking look. "Why do you always have to be right?"  
  
He shrugged, "it's a gift."  
  
"Not a good one." She looked down at the table; "I guess that when I met Chris I was swept off my feet. Too far-gone to notice that he wasn't as perfect as I thought he was. It's my fault, really, I'm a cop, I should have known that it was all just a façade he was putting on. I should have seen that deep down all he was was another drunken workaholic." She looked back up at him, "but, I see it now. At least I had the sense to get out. Most women just say they deserved it and go back for more."  
  
He took her hand into his and gave it a small squeeze, "there's no way you deserved to have a man like that...what you deserve is somebody who's gonna love you no matter what, regardless of your work hours, or anything else. HE didn't deserve YOU, he was lucky to have you as long as he did."  
  
She looked down again, "yeah, lucky him, unlucky me."  
  
He lowered his head so that he was looking her in the eyes, smiled sadly, and gave her hand another reassuring squeeze, "not anymore."

* * *

A/N: And the starts of EO begin...lol. So, anyway, you'll have to wait for the real EO, because I'm not going to have her cheating on her husband or anything like that. Sorry...it's got a lot to do with morals and ethics...and you know he's catholic so he wouldn't have her cheat. Why am I rambling? Why are you listening...or...rather reading me ramble? Anyway, review already!


	7. Chapter Seven

Fall to Pieces

Chapter 7

Disclaimer: Not mine...there, that's done.

* * *

It had been nearly two weeks since Olivia had left; Chris had tried to call her on her cell phone many times, even a few times on Elliot's home phone. He finally stopped calling when Elliot had managed to get a hold of the phone while he was calling and told him what he thought of him. Elliot had also told Chris that if he called his house one more time the consequences wouldn't be desirable. Well, something along the line of that, with a few profane words added into the mix. Things that Olivia was glad her children weren't around to hear.  
  
She had filed for divorce by then, she figured that's why he was calling more frequently. That was around the end of week one. Week two had been surprisingly quiet, she thanked God for that. The girls had questioned her about where their daddy was, but she just told them he had to go out of town for business. He did that sometimes, for seminars, they never lasted as long, though. But, the girls didn't doubt that daddy was just away for a couple days, in their minds he would be coming back. With lots of toys and clothes from a far off state like usual. Olivia wasn't looking forward to telling them that that wouldn't be happening this time.  
  
Mary had come to the station house one day in the beginning of week two, or at least, that's how Fin tells it. Apparently she and Elliot had just left on a new case; Munch and Fin had just finished one and were busy slaving away over mounds of paperwork. She'd come in raising hell, demanding to see Olivia. Fin says that Munch told her she wasn't there, and Mary had accused him of lying to her, calling him (and Olivia) all sorts of names. Mary's a couple of years Munch's senior, but according to Fin that didn't deter him from telling her just what he thought of her. Worse than a sailor's, that mouth of his.  
  
By then the whole department knew about the divorce. Everyone was telling her how sorry they were, or how she deserved much better. It annoyed her, she wished that they would just keep their noses out of her business, and mind their own. Though, it didn't seem too likely.  
  
So, with week two coming to a close, and week three hovering in the distance, Olivia was starting to wonder. Was she doing the right thing keeping her children from her father? Was she even doing the right thing by divorcing Chris? Of course, she knew the answer to both questions was "yes", no "if, ands, or buts" about it. But, she still wondered.  
  
Elliot had been a godsend. She was thankful that he treated the girls like they were his own, she knew that without him the whole process she was going through would be impossible. She wouldn't be able to do it without somebody to fall back on. And that's what Elliot was, her support, her rock to lean on. She wasn't sure how good of an idea that was. It scared her, how close they had gotten in only two weeks time.  
  
Shaking the idea out of her head she glared down at her paperwork, fighting to keep her eyes open. She was thinking too much and it was making her tired. What she wouldn't give for an hour or two in the crib. But, she mused; work would be over in half an hour. She only had thirty more minutes.  
  
Elliot must have noticed her internal struggle not to fall asleep, because the next thing she knew he was questioning her about it. "You tired, Liv?"  
  
She looked up at him, "no."  
  
He flashed her one of those magnetic smiles of his, "liar."  
  
Gasping, as if offended, she looked at him sternly. "I am not."  
  
Though she didn't think it possible, his smile grew. "Yeah, whatever."  
  
Instead of answering him she threw a crumpled piece of paper at his head, he dunked and it hit the floor behind him. He didn't see the second one coming though and it hit him square in the forehead. He looked up at her, shock dancing in his eyes, his mouth hanging open.  
  
"You keep your mouth open like that who knows what'll fly in it."  
  
He closed it and sent a dirty look her way. One that said that this wasn't over. She just shrugged at him and went back to her paperwork. Forty minutes later, while on the way to his car, Elliot got her back. Whoever told her that she was extremely ticklish on her sides was in trouble, and she only had two suspects. She had a 50/50 chance of getting it right on the first guess.  
  
They picked the "suspects" up from their new babysitters house and took them back to Elliot's apartment, where they ordered takeout. While the girls took a shower together Olivia and Elliot waited for their Chinese to arrive.  
  
"What happened?" She asked him, out of the blue, while flipping through the channels on his TV set.  
  
"With what?"  
  
"You said that you had been engaged before, but broke it off. What did your fiancée do that was bad enough for you to call it quits?"  
  
He sighed, it must've been something big, she mused. "Her name was Kathy. We were young, only 18. She got pregnant, we got engaged. But, one day, she wasn't pregnant anymore. She went behind my back and got an abortion. I called it off right then. She killed my child; I wanted nothing to do with her. I left, joined the marines, and never spoke with her again."  
  
Olivia was shocked, to say the least. "That's horrible."  
  
He didn't reply.  
  
"Do you want to talk about it?"  
  
He opened his mouth to say something, but the girls came bounding into the living room, pajamas on and hair dripping water.  
  
"Oh, girls! You're getting water everywhere," Olivia called getting off the couch. She scooped Becca up in her arms and took Cassie by the hand. "Come on, let's go dry your hair."  
  
Elliot got up too; "you need help?"  
  
She turned to look at him, "are you sure?"  
  
He nodded and picked Cassie up, "yeah."  
  
They packed into Elliot's guest bathroom, and while Olivia was towel drying Becca's short blonde hair, Elliot was blow-drying Cassie's longer, darker hair. As soon as they finished his doorbell rang and the aroma of Chinese food filled the apartment, coming from past the door. Elliot paid for the food and they ate, Cassie jabbering on about her day, Becca occasionally cutting in to say something she viewed as important.  
  
An hour later the two younger girls were tucked into bed, drifting off into sleep. Olivia and Elliot sat in the living room, all the lights off and the TV on mute, talking.  
  
"Did she ever tell you why?"  
  
"She never told me. From what I heard from her and all of her friends, while I had been away one weekend, she had lost her footing and fallen down a flight of stairs, loosing the baby in the process. But, I guess she didn't expect me to be suspicious. I found the bill in her car; it was right there where I could see it. I told her to keep the ring, but it was over."  
  
"I'm so sorry, Elliot. I could never imagine doing that, I love my girls too much. If I hadn't had them, my life would be so boring."  
  
"They're great girls. You're lucky to have them."  
  
In the darkness her hand found his and she gave it a squeeze. "Elliot, I don't know what I would do without you. You don't know how much you mean to me and the girls adore you. I really don't know where I would be if I had never met you." She pulled on his hand, bringing him closer to her. She hugged him, though her mind was screaming at her not too. His arms wrapped around her as well, hugging her just as tightly as she was hugging him.  
  
"I know, Liv. Trust me, I know." He whispered into her hair.  
  
Her mind was still screaming at her to pull back from the embrace, but for awhile she ignored it and just took in the feeling of being held. It had been such a long time since somebody had held her, with such tenderness. Chris surely never had, his embrace had always been stiff, and the only time he had ever showed her any emotion was when he wanted sex. She knew that that was the last thing on Elliot's mind, or at least, she hoped. When he began to trace imaginary objects on her back her mind finally won the battle, she pulled back. He suddenly stiffened, like maybe he was as embarrassed as she was.  
  
"We should...I should probably go to bed."  
  
He nodded, "yeah. G'night Liv."  
  
"Goodnight, El. I'll see you in the morning."  
  
He nodded again, almost solemnly. "Right. In the morning."  
  
She quickly scampered off into the guest bedroom, and then to the bathroom it was connected with. She splashed some cold water on her face, trying to hide the flush in her cheeks. Who from? She wasn't sure. Herself, she guessed. But, though the color in her face returned to its norm, she could still feel her cheeks burning. With what? That was another unknown. While she stared at her reflection in the mirror a thought popped into her mind. She quickly shook it off. There was no way she could be falling in love, or anything else, with her partner. No way...no way. Not at all. No way. She turned the water back on, splashing herself with the freezing liquid. There was no way...no way she was falling for her partner. She couldn't. There was no way.  
  
Right?

* * *

A/n: for those who were screaming EO!, EO!, EO!, at me, I dedicate this chapter to you. It's not much, but remember she's just now in the process of a divorce! You know, I think I'll do the next chapter from Elliot's POV. Tell me what you think, all right?


	8. Chapter Eight

Fall to Pieces  
  
Chapter Eight  
  
Disclaimer: Ah, come on ... can't you just give them to me, for like ... a day? Really, that's all I ask. 24 hours is a long time, ya know. Lots could happen ...

* * *

She woke to dark blue eyes staring down at her, a smile dancing in them. Cassie giggled and moved back, sitting on her legs. Olivia turned the alarm clock off and shook Becca gently, waking her. She got the two girls dressed and then dressed herself. When they ventured into the kitchen to get something for breakfast Elliot was already there, nurturing a cup of coffee. He smiled awkwardly at her, and her face mirrored the same smile. He poured her a cup of coffee and handed it to her, she took it eagerly, she hadn't slept much that night.  
  
Cassie seemed irritated; she barely touched her cereal. Olivia was worried; she had never seen Cassie in such a bad mood.  
  
"Cassie, honey," she called out to her, Cassie looked up from her cereal bowl. "What's bothering you?"  
  
The little girl shook her head, "Nothing."  
  
"Cassie..."  
  
"When's daddy coming home?"  
  
Olivia suddenly became very nervous, fidgeting where she stood. She glanced at Elliot who just frowned and shrugged. He was a great help. Sighing, she sat down in the chair next to Cassie.  
  
"Cassie, honey ... daddy won't be coming home."  
  
Her brow furrowed, "Why not?"  
  
"Oh god," Olivia thought, "how the hell am I going to explain this one?"  
  
Elliot seemed to understand, he crouched down next to Cassie and looked her in the eyes. "Cassie, daddy and mommy don't live together anymore."  
  
This confused her even more, "How come?"  
  
"Sweetie, daddy was mean to mommy."  
  
She shook her head, "No he wasn't."  
  
Becca was silent, looking from Elliot and Cassie to her mother, her brown eyes wide and confused.  
  
Olivia took over again, "Yes he was, baby. Daddy was very mean to mommy."  
  
Cassie folded her arms over her chest, "No!"  
  
Olivia lowered her head; her eyes closed, and sighed. This was not going well. She didn't think it would, but she truthfully didn't expect Cassie to question her father's absence so soon. She figured she had at least another week or so.  
  
Becca got out of her chair and walked to her mother, crawling into her lap. Olivia opened her eyes and looked at her youngest daughter, Becca smiled and hugged her. "It ok momma. I beweave you."  
  
Olivia hugged her back and looked over at Cassie, who was still adamant in her decision that her daddy was NOT a mean person, therefore couldn't possibly be mean to her mommy.  
  
"Cassie," Elliot said, still crouched down next to her chair, "what happened the first night your mommy brought you to my house?"  
  
"Mommy woke me up and brought me here."  
  
"Why did mommy wake you up?"  
  
She looked down at her hands, "'Cause daddy was yelling."  
  
"Why was daddy yelling?"  
  
She shrugged.  
  
"So, daddy was being mean?"  
  
Nodding she looked up at Olivia. "Daddy was mean?"  
  
"Yes, baby, daddy was mean."  
  
Cassie looked over at the clock on the stove; "We'll be late."  
  
Olivia nodded and stood up, Becca in her arms. Cassie got her things and Elliot grabbed Becca's and they headed down for his car. They drove to Cassie's school and then to drop Becca off at her babysitters house. After both children were gone the car became quiet. It was an awkward silence, but neither person wanted to be the first to speak. They had already pulled up in his parking space before he finally broke the silence and spoke to her.  
  
"Are we going to talk about this?"  
  
He didn't need to explain to her; she knew what he was speaking of. "No." She stated simply.  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"There's nothing to talk about?"  
  
He looked over at her, but she was looking out the window. "Are you sure?"  
  
She looked at him, her brown eyes met his blue ones, and though both wanted to look away, neither could. "This isn't the time or the place Elliot."  
  
"Then when is the time and where is the place? All you have to do is tell me, I can wait."  
  
She sighed, "Elliot, with everything that's going on you'll be waiting for a long time."  
  
"I can deal with that."  
  
"Maybe," she said looking away, "But I'm not so sure that I could."  
  
"I'm sorry."  
  
She looked back at him, confusion dancing in her eyes. "For what?"  
  
"What happened last night, It shouldn't have."  
  
She furrowed her brow, "Nothing happened. We were both upset, we were just comforting each other. It was nothing," she lied.  
  
"It was something, we both know that."  
  
"This can't happen."  
  
This time Olivia was the one who didn't need to explain, he already knew what she meant. "I know."  
  
She nodded, "Good."  
  
He didn't reply, instead turned his car off and got out, leaving Olivia behind. She watched him go and cradled her head in her hands, sighing to herself. She knew that this was going to happen, she didn't want to push him away, but she had to. She was in the beginning stages of a divorce, one that was bound to be a bitter one, her having a relationship, with her partner nonetheless, was not the smartest thing for her to do. But, God help her it was the only thing on her mind. Two weeks after she left her husband and she was already thinking about another man, maybe even loved him. She banged the side of her head against the window.  
  
_"God, Olivia,"_ she said to herself, _"Get a grip."_  
  
She pushed her thoughts and feelings aside for the time being and ran a hand haphazardly though her short hair. Checking her reflection in the mirror she opened the passengers' side door and stepped out of the car. She pulled on her shirt and slid into her jacket. Her mind now on professional mode she began to walk towards the station house, ready the long day of work that was ahead of her.

* * *

He was hurt; there was no denying it. It wasn't like he didn't understand her apprehension, she had good reasons for it, but she had basically told him that there was no chance there would ever be anything between them. Anything that was more than partners and friends. He thought there was something there, he could've sworn he felt it the night before, he thought she had felt the same way. Maybe he was wrong.  
  
His mind told him to stop being so selfish; she was going through something terrible. Her marriage, her life, had shattered and fallen to pieces and there he was wondering why she didn't share the feelings he felt for her. It told him to wait, to give her some time, she had only been separated from her husband for a little over two weeks, a relationship with anybody, whether it be her partner or some random Joe walking down the street notwithstanding, was probably the last thing on her mind.  
  
But what had happened the night before, no matter how platonic their intentions had been, told him otherwise. There had definitely been something there, something beneath the surface. Something that she had hidden, under that nice façade she had come up with, the one that wasn't doing its job in fooling him.  
  
He had sat in the living room after she left. He watched as a faint light came from under the guestroom door, not bright enough to be the bedroom light, but brighter than a lamp. The bathroom was his best guess. It had been confirmed by the sound of running water, from the sink by the sounds of it. He sat there and watched that light, it hadn't gone off until nearly an hour after she had gone off. Nearly an hour ... he knew Olivia better than to assume she was just getting ready for sleep. No, something had been bothering her.  
  
She walked in the station house about five minutes after he did, she had her work face on and was ready for whatever the Captain would be throwing at them. He wondered how they did it, not just the two of them, but everybody he worked with. He wondered how they could see the things they saw and then go home, how they could lead two completely different lives, how they could manage to come into work with a smile on their faces, or go home with that same smile.  
  
When she sat down in front of him he noticed something that he had never noticed before, at least not in the past two weeks, her wedding rings were gone. It made sense, but he hadn't thought to look and see. Of course, with her in the process of divorcing the man she wouldn't wear his rings. She had probably sent them back to him, it wouldn't be like her to keep them or pawn them off.  
  
They day was a slow one, paperwork ensuing the case they had had the day before. That day there was no friendly banter between any of them, no sarcastic remarks from Munch, and minimum conversation. It was like the others could sense Olivia and Elliot's bad moods. As long as they had worked together they probably could.  
  
When work was finally over Olivia and Elliot picked up the girls from Heather's house. She invited the two detectives in for something to eat but they respectively declined, promising to another time. Heather smiled and told them goodnight. They left and drove to Elliot's house where Olivia made the girls grilled ham and cheese sandwiches. While they ate in the kitchen (Cassie promising to watch her little sister), Elliot and Olivia sat in the living room and talked.  
  
"I know that what I said earlier was a bit harsh, but it was the truth. I can't have anything going on right now, Elliot. Even if I wanted it to."  
  
He nodded, "I understand that, I just wanted you to know that I'm here."  
  
She smiled, "I know, that's what bothers me ... you're a distraction, Elliot. One that I like but can't afford to have right now. I can't stay here much longer, who knows what would happen."  
  
"I would never do anything to jeopardize your divorce."  
  
"I know, I trust you. It's me I don't trust. I'm going to look for an apartment this weekend. Nothing big, preferably just a one or two bedroom, Cassie and Becca can sleep together or with me. I like staying here with you, but I can't."  
  
"I understand."  
  
"Good. I don't want you to think that I'm just trying to find a way to distance myself from you, I just can't count on myself not to get too far into things, because if I stayed the chances that I would would be too high."  
  
He nodded, "I know."  
  
Smiling she stood up and went into the kitchen to check on the girls, they were both done eating. She told Cassie to go get her shower in the guest bathroom as she and Becca showered in Elliot's bathroom. Then after the girls were ready for bed she tucked them in and wished them sweet dreams. When she walked into the living room Elliot was standing in the hallway putting on his T-shirt. Olivia felt her face heat up and turned away, sitting down on the couch and turning on the TV. Elliot hadn't seen her standing there. She was thankful that he didn't.  
  
After watching TV for a while she announced that she was going to go to bed. To her surprise Elliot followed her to the bedroom door, and when she turned around she found his lips on hers. She was shocked, to say the least, but though she knew she should she didn't pull back.  
  
When he did pull back her heart was beating so loud it was a wonder he couldn't hear it's rushed thump, thump, thump. He smiled at the look on her face.  
  
"So you don't forget about me," he explained.  
  
_Oh buddy,_ she thought, _that's definitely not going to happen anytime soon._  
  
She could only smile and nod at him. Without warning he kissed her again then walked down the hallway to his room, leaving her there with her jaw dropped, trying to return her breathing to normal.  
  
Why did he do these things to her? She wondered as she slipped into bed next to Cassie. What could possibly make him think that that would help her with leaving? It only made things even more confusing and hard. It was definitely a welcomed surprise, but not a smart one.  
  
Her last thoughts as she drifted off to sleep were of how warm and soft his lips had been and how she hoped that she would have that feeling again soon.  
  
She had some very ... interesting dreams that night.

* * *

A/N: I know ... I'm mean. There's more where that came from. Let me know what'cha think. 


	9. Chapter Nine

Fall to Pieces  
  
Chapter Nine  
  
Disclaimer: Still waiting for those twenty-four hours ... anytime you want to give them to me, I'm game.  
  
A/N: I couldn't write about the dreams! They were way too "interesting" for my story (which is a PG-13 by the way), but I'll work something out. Nothing too telling, though.  
  
XXXXXXXXXX  
  
The next morning had been ... awkward to say the least. She had woken flushed, her cheeks still burning. She certainly hadn't had dreams like that in years. Not that she was complaining, they were pleasant dreams. Thankfully she had gotten up a little earlier than the girls, so she had been able to return herself to normal, it took a fairly long cold shower, but the girls could be heavy sleepers.  
  
When she brought the girls into the kitchen for breakfast he was already there, sipping on a cup of coffee. The smell of caffeine perked her up instantly, and she took the cup he handed her readily. But, when their fingertips grazed a flood of feelings washed over her. His lips on hers, the strong smell of aftershave mixed with his own unique sent, the feel of his hands on her hips, pulling her further into that kiss for the night prior. Then, there were other things, from her dreams. How real it had felt, his hands roaming her body and hers his. His weight over hers, him whispering in her ear, the heat ... oh, boy. Those were not things she should be thinking of so early in the morning.  
  
"Olivia?" He called out to her, a bemused smile playing on his lips.  
  
She looked down at her coffee cup, "Hmm?"  
  
"You all right?" He inquired.  
  
"Fine," was all she said.  
  
He was about to press further when Becca tugged at her shirt, "Momma?"  
  
Olivia looked down at her, thankful for the disruption. "Yes, honey?"  
  
"I go school? Go wit Cassie?"  
  
Olivia smiled at the hopeful look on her face and picked her up into her arms, "How about we give it a few more years, huh? Let's wait until you're five."  
  
"I two!"  
  
"Yes, Becca, you're two years old."  
  
"I big girl!"  
  
Olivia laughed, "That too." She put her back down on the ground, "Go finish your breakfast, ok?"  
  
"Okey," she said running off towards the table. Olivia picked her cup of coffee back up and ignoring Elliot walked into the living room to check the forecast for the day. She heard him following her as she sat on the couch and looked around her for the remote. It was on the coffee table in front of her. She picked it up just as she felt a warm body sitting a little too closely to her. She didn't acknowledge him, instead turned it to the weather channel and waited for the local on the 8's.  
  
"Liv," he called out to her. She looked over at him.  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
She shook her head, "Nothing." She turned to the TV and waited, after a few minutes what she was waiting for came on. It was to be a nice day, the highs around late 80's early 90's. She called for the girls, telling them to finish up it was almost time to go. Standing she shut of the television with the remote and threw it haphazardly behind her and onto the couch. Grabbing her coat she pulled it on and called to the girls again, they came running out of the kitchen, Cassie pulling on her bookbag and Becca coming straight for mommy with her arms reaching out, a gesture she knew well. She picked her up and let her rest on one of her hips.  
  
"Whoa, Becca, either you're getting a little big or mommy's getting old."  
  
"Momma old!" She squealed.  
  
"Why, thank you," she said with a chuckle.  
  
"Yooh wecome."  
  
As they drove to drop the girls off at their separate locations her dream was forgotten. For the time being, that was.  
  
XXXXXXXXXX  
  
A week later:  
  
She stood alone in the middle of an empty room, it wasn't large, but then again large wasn't what she was looking for. It would work, she decided. She exited the room and entered another, which was a bit larger. _For the girls,_ she mused. _They need more room than I do_. The living room was a fairly good size, as was the kitchen/dinning room. There was one bathroom, but again they wouldn't need much and it was a nice, large bathroom with a tub and a separate shower. It wasn't much, but it would do. The best thing about it was that it was centrally located, only a few minutes from Cassie's school and close by Heather's house. And, though she probably wouldn't mention it much, it was only 10 minutes away from Elliot's apartment.  
  
She let the real-estate agent know that she would take the apartment and signed the necessary papers. In two days they could move in. She had already spoken to Elliot, Munch, and Fin of helping her with the moving. She would need somebody with a truck to get the beds and dressers, as well as some other things from the house. Hopefully Chris would be working when they got there the next day, which was a Saturday. But, she doubted it. Maybe she would get lucky.  
  
As she drove down the street that would bring her to Heather's apartment her thoughts drifted to roughly a week before, when she had first told Elliot of her plans to find an apartment, and he had kissed her before she had gone to sleep. Neither of them had spoken of the incident since then, but on occasion she would catch him staring, that same hungry look dancing in his eyes that she had seen that night. Her cheeks would flush and they would both look away. Then, there were times that she would catch herself staring at him, his lips in particular. Reminding herself of how they felt, how they tasted, all this after only two small kisses. She didn't want to know what anything further would have her thinking, which is why she had to leave so quickly. Not that she didn't trust him, she knew that he had only kissed her to reassure her that he would be there waiting for her, she didn't trust herself. If she was behaving in this sort of way after only two kisses what would happen if she took things ... further, on her accord. Because, she knew that if she stayed, that was a likely possibility.  
  
She shook the thoughts out of her head and when the light turned green drove off down the street, then pulled in front of the building that Heather lived in. She buzzed her in, and Olivia began up the two flights of stairs. Which was another good thing about her new apartment, it was on the ground level. As she knocked on the door it slowly creaked open, Cassie was waiting on the other end.  
  
"You get it?"  
  
Olivia nodded, "We move in Sunday."  
  
A large smile appeared on her face and she ran and wrapped her arms around Olivia's waist. She laughed and walked into the apartment, searching for Heather. She found her in Grace's room, along with Becca.  
  
"Heather, can I talk to you?"  
  
She looked up from the worksheet she was helping her daughter with, "Sure." She got up from the bed and walked out into the living room with Olivia.  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"I'm moving into a new apartment on Sunday, I know you said that Chris asked your husband the other day if you had heard from me, and I just wanted to thank you for telling him to say that he hadn't. It's gone well so far, as far as me being able to keep the girls away from him, and I don't want them getting hurt; I know he'll end up doing that. Emotionally. But, here's the new address," she handed her the folded up piece of paper in her hand, "the number is there, too. Call or stop by whenever. If I'm home you're welcome."  
  
She smiled, "Thank you, Olivia."  
  
"I should be thanking you, Heather. I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't been here to help me, I wouldn't have anybody to watch the girls. It means a lot to me that you would look after them while I'm working, most people would look at my hours and tell me I'm crazy, hire a babysitter."  
  
"I enjoy the extra company. So does Grace. It's no problem."  
  
Olivia nodded, "I just wanted to make sure you knew how thankful I was."  
  
"I know."  
  
"I should be getting them back to Elliot's house, we've got a lot of packing up to do."  
  
"Right, you go do that."  
  
Olivia went and got Cassie and Becca from Grace's room and they walked down the stairs and loaded into her car. When they got to Elliot's apartment Olivia helped the girls pack some things, leaving out only the outfits they would wear the next day and Sunday when they would be moving in. After the girls had their dinner, showers, and TV time she tucked them into bed and sat out in the living room alone, her head resting on the back of the sofa, eyes staring at the ceiling. After a few minutes she heard heavy footfall and then somebody sitting next to her on the couch, a bit closer than she would have liked.  
  
"You sure you want to do this?" He asked.  
  
"I have to, that doesn't mean I want to."  
  
"Then stay."  
  
She sighed, "Elliot, I can't. You know that."  
  
"I've promised you thousands of times that I wouldn't try anything, not even another kiss."  
  
She shut her eyes with a sigh, "And I've told you thousands of times that it's not you that I don't trust, it's me."  
  
"You think I would take advantage of you're venerability. Because that's what that says to me, that if for some reason you tried something I would cave and let it happen."  
  
"I can be a very convincing person, if I want something bad enough."  
  
They sat in silence for nearly ten minutes before she spoke again; "If you only knew, Elliot, how hard this is for me you'd understand ... you would know why it's so important that I leave so soon. Why I can't risk staying."  
  
"You don't give me enough credit, Liv. Maybe I do understand how hard it is for you to leave, maybe it's hard for me to let you go."  
  
"It's not like you're loosing me forever, Elliot. I'm just getting an apartment. Good Lord, I've lived without you for six years now; somehow I dealt with it then. Why should it be so hard for me to be able to live without you there now? Why shouldn't I be able to go and be a single mother? Is there some reason I should have to have you around all the time?"  
  
He shook his head, "I just thought you'd like to."  
  
"This has nothing to do with whether I'd like to or not, because yeah, I'd really enjoy that. But, I don't have to have it. Not now at least, and I can't have it now, so it really doesn't matter. I just hate how these living situations have made me need you like they have. You're my best friend Elliot and I love you but I don't need you."  
  
He didn't say anything, maybe she had taken him off guard with the 'I love you' but, she really hadn't meant it in the romantically way, it was the platonic love she had been speaking of. It was her love for her as a friend, a partner. The fact that she was beginning to fall for him notwithstanding. She stood up from the couch and started walking off to her bedroom.  
  
He called after her; "Do you mean that?"  
  
She turned around to look at him, "Mean what?"  
  
"Do you love me?"  
  
Damn, he'd caught that. "You're my best friend, Elliot. We've worked together for six years. Of course I love you, you've always been there for me."  
  
"So, as a friend you love me? Nothing else?"  
  
"Elliot," she said slowly, "I'm going through a divorce at the moment. The last thing I want to dwell on is my feelings for you, no matter what they are."  
  
"But, you have feelings for me, other than as friends?"  
  
She shook her head, "I really don't know."  
  
"And you have to go? It's not an option for you to stay?"  
  
"No," she said sadly, "It's not. If I'm ever going to figure this out, if you ever want an answer to your questions, I have to leave. Because if I stay I won't be able to work this out, I'll be stuck on seeing you 24/7. I'm sorry Elliot, but sometimes I just need to be away from you. And it doesn't help me figure out my feelings with you always there asking questions."  
  
"I'm sorry," he said solemnly.  
  
"Don't be," she said shaking her head, "there's no reason for you to be sorry. It's not you, I'm the one with the screwed up life and emotions. I just need some space."  
  
"I'm always here you know."  
  
She nodded, "I know."  
  
He stood up from the couch and walked up to her, pulling her into his arms. She rested her head on his chest and sighed. He held her in his arms for a good five minutes before she pulled away and kissed him on the cheek. "Goodnight, Elliot."  
  
"Night, Liv."  
  
She broke away and walked back down the hallway and into the guest bedroom. She listened as he walked down the hallway, into his room, and shut the door behind him. Closing her eyes with the sound of the shutting door she prayed that what she was doing was the right thing. She prayed she wasn't making the biggest mistake of her life. Lying down in bed she realized that she was falling in love with him, and it scared the living hell out of her. 


	10. Chapter Ten

Fall to Pieces  
  
Chapter 10  
  
Disclaimer: (waiting patiently ... well, not that patiently) Where are those 24 hours!!!??? Early Christmas presents are welcomed!  
  
XXXXXXXXXX  
  
She stood in the middle of a newly furnished room; a queen sized bed in the corner, a nightstand sitting next to it, and two dressers one of which held a small 12 inch television. It wasn't much to look at, the walls were a bland shade of tan, the hardwood floors were worn, and the comforter on the bed was just a plain black with white pillows and sheets. It was all that she needed, she was content.  
  
In the room across the hall two young girls jumped happily on their beds, one in the top left corner of the room and another in the top right. Both twin sized, clad with bright pink sheets and a purple bedspread with pink flowers. On the east side of the room was an open closet door, showing the barren contents of the small addition. That would be finished some other time. Two white dressers stood side by side, also void of clothing, and also to be tackled some other day.  
  
The kitchen/dining room held a small four-person table, all the necessary appliances, nothing more and nothing less. The living room looked like anything but, with only a slightly larger television sitting in the middle with two beanbag chairs thrown haphazardly in front of it. Where two young girls had sat watching Spongebob while their mother and a bunch of grown-ups had carried in box after box and various pieces of furniture. The one bathroom was plain, done in light and dark blue. It wasn't something out of a magazine, but it would do.  
  
In her bedroom she could hear the sounds of laughter coming from across the hall, and she smiled to herself. The girls were ecstatic to have a room to themselves, though at first they weren't too thrilled about having to share a room, now they were having the time of their lives. She sat on the edge of the bed and leaned forward, her elbows resting on her thighs, she sighed to herself. It was a small, quaint place and she enjoyed it but found herself missing the large, spaciousness of her old house, the one she and Chris had picked out together. Her very own dream home, but that was all gone now.  
  
Even Elliot's apartment had been larger than the one she and the girls were staying in. Not much larger, but it had a dining room, as well as the eat in kitchen, a larger master bedroom, and an extra bath. But, Olivia didn't expect to stay where she was long, only until her divorce was final. From there she would get something larger, if she didn't get her home in Queens.  
  
Her thoughts were taking off as soon as her buzzer sounded.  
  
XXXXXXXXXX  
  
She'd left, that morning. He helped her move into her new apartment, it wasn't too far away from his, he wondered if she had planned it that way or if it was only an extra.  
  
His apartment was eerily quiet; he didn't remember it ever being so ... unnerving before. He turned the television on for some sort of noise, but it didn't do much. It only made him feel even more alone and added desperate.  
  
He could only blame it on one person, though. That person was himself. He had pushed her away, taken things too far. He should have known not to take his relationship with her any further, not even a millimeter, it only complicated things. If he hadn't made things so awkward between them maybe she wouldn't have gone so soon. But no, he had to be an idiot. When he should have known that she wouldn't receive him so readily, she was in the beginning stages of a divorce; her husband had hurt her, emotionally and physically. He felt like an ass.  
  
He paced in his living room for what seemed like hours, but in reality was only a couple of minutes. The hum from the television was not doing anything to get rid of his loneliness; it was only proving to be annoying. He grabbed the remote and shut it off; the room plunged into darkness as a result. He paced in the darkness, occasionally bumping into things and cursing at them.  
  
He finally got to the point where his boredom was being to overshadow his loneliness; he had absolutely nothing to do. He thought about going to check out Olivia's apartment, see what she and the girls had done with it since he left nearly five hours prior. He could bring dinner, pizza or Chinese. He decided that was what he was going to do, stop by and see her and the girls, with Chinese takeout. He grabbed his wallet and keys and headed out of the apartment.  
  
It didn't take long to get the Chinese food; it wasn't so crowded at the restaurant. When he got the food he took it to his car and phoned Olivia's cell. As far as he knew she didn't have a home phone yet. She didn't answer, instead her voice mail did the job for her, she must have turned it off. He left a message saying that he was coming over just incase she would pick her phone up and turn it on. He turned on his radio and took off for her new apartment.  
  
It didn't take long for him to get there, her home was only a few minutes away so the drive was short. He pressed the buzzer and waited for her to answer. She did after a few seconds.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Hey, Liv. It's me ... I brought food."  
  
She paused for a second, like she was thinking it over. "What kind?," she asked like it would make a difference.  
  
"Chinese."  
  
There was another pause before she said, "Come on in." He could hear the smile in her voice.  
  
He did as told and walked inside, her apartment was 07. He knocked on the door and she answered, Becca hugging her legs.  
  
"What'cha got?" She asked him, standing in the doorframe.  
"General Tso's chicken, fried rice, and peppered steak."  
  
She looked down at Becca, "What'cha say, hon? Sound good?"  
  
Becca nodded.  
  
Olivia smiled and looked back up at him, "Well, if she says it's ok, then it's ok." She picked Becca up into her arms and backed out of the doorway to let him in. She called Cassie into the room and set Becca down in a chair at the dining room table. Cassie came running out of the bedroom and into the kitchen.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You want something to eat?"  
  
The girl perked up and nodded happily. "What kind of food?"  
  
"Chinese," Elliot answered her.  
  
"Yum," she said sitting down at the table next to her sister.  
  
Olivia turned and opened a cabinet, "I'm gonna make you two a plate, what to you want to drink?"  
  
"Apple Juice!" Cassie yelled out.  
  
Becca agreed, "Yeah!"  
  
"All right, apple juice it is. What about you, Elliot," she said smiling, "do you want apple juice to?"  
  
He shook his head, "Soda will be fine."  
  
"Suit yourself," she said grabbing some cups from the cabinet.  
  
She made the drinks and then they ate dinner together. Afterwards Olivia got the girls ready for bed and Elliot helped her tuck them in and read them their bedtime story. When they were asleep the two walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table, since there were no couches in the living room. Olivia put on a pot of coffee and sat down across from Elliot.  
  
"So ... why did you really come over?"  
  
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"So ... why did you really come over?" She asked, sitting down across from him at her new dining room table. She knew that there was something else to the reason he came over, he couldn't have just thought he'd drop by with some food. No, Elliot was more complex than that. And she knew she was starting something she shouldn't, she was starting up a conversation that would most likely deal with the whole reason she moved into her own apartment in the first place.  
  
He was silent for a moment, as if he didn't really know how to say why he had come. "Um ...," he started, "I don't know ... I was just sitting at home and there was nothing to do. I figured that you would enjoy the company and the girls would enjoy the food. Is it a bad thing that I came?"  
  
She shook her head, "Not at all. I just wanted to know why."  
  
"So," he said, fiddling with the place mat in front of him. "How do you like having your own place?"  
  
She smiled, "It's nothing big, but it'll do. I feel better about not mooching off of you anymore."  
  
"You were never mooching."  
  
"Yes I was."  
  
He shrugged, "Well I didn't mind."  
  
"I know you didn't, but I did."  
  
"That's not the reason you left though."  
  
"No," she said shaking her head, "it's not."  
  
"Are we ever going to talk about it?"  
  
"Well, yeah. Of course we are. But, this isn't exactly the right time for that kind of conversation."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Elliot, I've not even got to the hard part of the divorce, discussing 'us' is not exactly the right thing to do. It really won't help my divorce. I mean, what if something was to happen as a result and Chris found out. It would just help him out in the long run. Who knows, he might even get custody of the girls. I can't let that happen."  
  
"I know Olivia. But, I'm not saying that there has to be some kind of result. At least not right away. I already told you that I can wait, it might take awhile, I know, but I'd be able to wait."  
  
"I know that," she said, shaking her head. "I know you'd do that for me. But, Elliot. What I've been trying to tell you is that I wouldn't be able to. I couldn't ... I wouldn't be able to be around you knowing how you feel about me and how I feel about you. That's why we can't talk about this, not now."  
  
He nodded, standing up from the table. "When you're ready, I'm ready."  
  
She looked down at her hands as he started to walk towards the door. She looked up just as she heard the front door shut, shaking her head. "I'm not." She said to herself.  
  
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A/N: I know, I know, it's taken forever. My computer has been totally screwed up, so for a long time I was cut off from the Internet! Ahh! So horrible. Let me know what'cha think. I know this isn't my best chapter, but it'll get good again. 


	11. Chapter Eleven

Fall to Pieces  
  
Chapter Eleven  
  
Disclaimer: Ok. Maybe 24 hours is too much, I'll settle for 10! Pretty please, with sugar AND a cherry on top?  
  
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It had been two months now, two months since she had referred to him as her husband, two months since the girls had seen their father, two months since she had made the biggest and best decision of her life.  
  
The girls had learned not to ask of their father, Cassie understood most of what was going on and Becca just understood that whenever she talked about daddy mommy got sad, and she didn't want mommy sad. They were adjusting well, she thought. It might be the wrong thing to do; keeping them away from their father, but Chris had changed when she left. From what she had seen he was getting drunk more often and had started sleeping around. She didn't want her girls in that kind of atmosphere.  
  
Things with Elliot had slowed down, she had made sure of that. He still came by sometimes and she still brought the girls over to see him on occasion, but they hadn't talked about anything that had occurred in the first few weeks of her divorce. He had tried many times, but she always blown him off, she wasn't ready yet for that talk, not even close. She could tell that it hurt him, but there wasn't anything more she could do about it.  
  
The divorce was going a lot better than she thought it would; it might even be over sooner than expected. She was thankful for that. Chris wasn't putting up as much of a struggle anymore, at most he wanted to take the girls away from her now, but she had everything ready for them. A place to live, a school to go to, a babysitter for when she was at work. Chris had none of those things, except for the place to live. He had no way of getting them to school with his work schedule and Mary was getting too old to watch after a 2 year old all day, not to mention his drinking problem. Things were looking much better for Olivia.  
  
Work was ... well work was work, nothing had changed. Thankfully what was happening between Olivia and Elliot had no effect on their being partners, or if it did they were good at hiding it. People at the station house had finally stopped telling her how sorry they were about the divorce and how they had never like Chris anyhow, but that was because she had asked them not to, it was getting to be a daily thing, and it just annoyed the hell out of her.  
  
"Momma?" Cassie called as the door to Olivia's bedroom creaked open; "Can I sleep with you?"  
  
She sat up in her bed, forgetting her thoughts, "Sure honey, what's wrong?"  
  
"The storm," she said as lightning flashed through her window. Cassie jumped a little and came running towards the bed, crawling up onto it and towards her mother, then snuggled up as close as she could.  
  
Olivia smiled and watched the door, waiting for it to open again. As if on cue a few seconds later the door open slightly and a mass of blonde hair could be seen, then bright brown eyes. "Mommy," Becca whispered, "yooh wake?"  
  
"I'm awake Becca," she said, "you wanna crawl into bed with me and sissy?"  
  
She nodded and toddled over to the bed, then climbed it carefully. She crawled over to where her older sister and mother lay, and cuddled up next to Cassie. "Night, mommy." She sighed as she got comfortable. "Uve yooh."  
  
"Love you, too." She whispered back to her, "Goodnight girls."  
  
"Night momma," Cassie said. And a few minutes later both were snoring lightly. Olivia stayed awake, watching the two as the slept, the occasional flash of lightning illuminating the room and thunder booming. It was the first big storm that they had gone through at the new apartment. If this had been a couple of months earlier one would be snuggled up to their mother while the other was in the protective arms of their father. Olivia snorted to herself; they were doing just fine without him.  
  
She laid back down and closed her eyes, listening to the storm as it died down. After a while the threatening thunder had died down to a light rumble and she could no longer see the lightning through her eyelids. When the storm had passed from overhead she relaxed into sleep, dreams fleeting.  
  
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She woke up the next morning to cold hands around her arm and a voice gently calling out to her.  
  
"Momma," Becca whispered, tugging on her arms once more. "Wake up!"  
  
She opened her eyes slowly, allowing them to adjust to the change in brightness. Becca let go of her arm and smiled at her, and Olivia sat up in the bed.  
  
"Where's your sister?"  
  
She shrugged and scooted to the side of the bed, slipped down off of it, and ran out of the room. Olivia pushed the covers off of her haphazardly, running a hand through her short hair. She yawned and stretched out her arms then made her way into the bathroom.  
  
She brushed her teeth then splashed cold water on her face, to wake her up, and ran a brush through her hair lazily. When she ventured into the living room Becca and Cassie were sitting on the couch and watching Saturday morning cartoons. She smiled at the two and started to walk towards the kitchen when there was a knock at the door.  
  
"I'll get it!" Cassie called, jumping off of the couch.  
  
"Oh, no you don't," Olivia said, holding her back. "You know you don't answer the door."  
  
"But, you're home, mom."  
  
She shook her head, "Doesn't matter. You don't answer the door, not even if you ask who's there before you open it. You hear me?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Good," she sighed. "Now go sit back down."  
  
There was another knock at the door, "I'm coming!" She called out, making her way to the door. She looked through the peephole, it was Elliot. She closed her eyes with a sigh and swung open the door. He smiled at her and she returned it halfheartedly. "What's up, Elliot?"  
  
He stepped inside, without asking. "Nothing much," he shrugged. "I didn't have anything to do so I figured I'd come over and see if you and the girls were busy, maybe we could go to the park?"  
  
Becca jumped up from the couch, "Park! I go!"  
  
Olivia shut the door and walked into the living room, "I don't know..."  
  
"Do you have something planed already?" He asked, following her into the living room.  
  
"Well..." she replied, "no, not really."  
  
"So, then what's stopping you from going to the park?" He looked over at Becca and Cassie, "You guys want to go to the park, right?" The nodded furiously, "Then ask mommy nicely, maybe she'll say yes."  
  
Olivia narrowed her eyes at him and he smiled, shrugging his shoulders. The two girls came running towards their mother and stopped right in front of her, staring up hopefully. "Can we, mommy?" Cassie asked, sticking her lower lip out (a trick she had learned worked every time at a very young age), "Please?"  
  
Olivia sighed and glared at Elliot once again, "Fine. But I have to take a shower first and so do you two." She shooed them off with her hands, "Go get some clothes to wear."  
  
When they had gone Olivia turned to look Elliot square in the eyes, "That's not fair, using my own children against me," she took a step towards him and he took a step back, "I thought that we agreed on this, Elliot. Until my divorce is over minimal contact outside work, whether they're there or not. It's just not safe, you know that as well as I do!"  
  
"Oh, come on," he sighed, "it's the park for cryin' out loud! Tell me, what could possibly go wrong."  
  
She opened her mouth to answer and when she realized she had no reply shut it again. Giving up she pushed past him and walked into her room, grabbing something to wear. Then she made her way into he bathroom and helped the girls with their bath, then got them dressed. After they were done she sent them into the living room to watch some more cartoons while she showered and got ready. Half an hour later she pulled on her shirt and walked out of the bathroom and into the living room.  
  
"Are you guys ready?" She asked as she leaned against the wall, her arms folded over her chest.  
  
The two girls nodded happily and got off of the couch while Elliot came out of the kitchen, a coffee cup in hand. "Let's get going then." He suggested with a smile.  
  
Olivia sighed to herself once more; it was going to be a long day.  
  
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A/N: Yeah, well. This is a bit shorter than I would have liked it to be, but the next part of the story is going to be too long to add to this chapter. Anyway, let me know what'cha think. Flames are allowed, but not exactly wanted, mind you. So, please be nice! 


	12. Chapter Twelve

Fall to Pieces  
  
Chapter Twelve  
  
Disclaimer: Ok, ten hours is too much... how about five? Five's not too much to ask for is it? That's only the equivalent of five episodes... a lot can happen in five episodes, but hey! Please!  
  
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At the park she fought to keep her cool, it had become almost too hard to even be around him lately. Outside of work, that was. When she was at work she could put her game face on, when she was at work he was nothing more than her partner. She wasn't sure how she did this, but she did, by the grace of God she did.  
  
They sat together on a bench while the girls played, and every now and then Becca or Cassie would call the two over to them, wanting the adults to play along. Maybe swing them, or go down the slide. Olivia was use to this; they were of course, her children. But, she was surprised how natural Elliot seemed with this girls, she found herself wondering what kind of father he would be.  
  
So, while he pushed the two girls on the swings she sat back on that same bench and watched. The girls were laughing at something that he said and he had a goofy grin on his face, it was a rare sight. Most of the time, when he was around children it was because of work and they had gone through some form of abuse. Elliot had to be professional and closed off then, to see him open and playful with her children was, to her, amazing. Becca looked over at her, waved, then called out to her. She stood up from the bench and walked across the park to where they were.  
  
"What is it, hon?" She asked as she took over for Elliot, pushing Becca while he continued to push Cassie.  
  
"I'm hungry," she told her as a matter-of-factly. Olivia laughed at her bluntness.  
  
"Ok, what to you want to eat?" There was really no use in asking, she always wanted the same thing.  
  
"Booger King!" She cried out.  
  
"It's _Burger_ Kind, Becca!" Cassie scolded, flying past them on her swing.  
  
Olivia smiled, "You want to go now?"  
  
"Yeah!" Becca and Cassie both called out.  
  
"All right, then." She stopped Becca's swinging and picked the girl up, holding her on one hip. "Umph, Becca, you're getting a little too big for this."  
  
"Uh-uh," Becca said, resting her head on her mothers shoulder.  
  
Elliot did the same with Cassie, but instead let her climb on his back. They walked towards Olivia's car together, the girls laughing and giggling the whole way.  
  
They drove to the nearest burger king and decided to go inside to eat rather than go through the drive through. While they ate Becca and Cassie talked Olivia and Elliot were relatively silent. Olivia was once again trying to keep her cool, since she was way too close to Elliot for comfort. She focused on her daughters' conversation, or rather tried to focus on it. Thankfully, the girls ate quickly and didn't ask to play in the restaurant's playground, they were sleepy from playing the whole day.  
  
So, on the way back to Olivia's apartment the two dozed in the backseat, Becca snored lightly and Cassie mumbled in her sleep. Olivia and Elliot shared smiles every time they did so.  
  
When Cassie laughed Olivia looked back at her, she was still asleep. "She gets that from me," she told Elliot. "I've talked in my sleep since I was a little older than she was."  
  
"What about the snoring?"  
  
She smiled, "Chris's father, the only tolerable relative that he has. Lucky for the man, he saw the same thing in Mary that Chris has, and left her only a year after Chris and I married. I miss the guy, I wonder what he's doing now. He's met the girls a few times, but that was when Becca was just born." She pulled into her parking space and turned the car off, "Will you help me with the girls? I don't want to wake them."  
  
"Ok," he said, nodding. The quietly got out of the car and they each picked a sleeping girl up into the arms, Olivia had Becca and Elliot carried Cassie. They carefully made their way to her apartment and laid the girls down in their separate beds, neither girl stirred.  
  
Olivia lead Elliot back into the living room and asked him if he wanted anything to drink.  
  
"No," he said, shaking his head. "I'm fine, thanks."  
  
"Suit yourself," she walked into her kitchen and made herself a coke, then walked back into the living room and sat next to him on the couch. "So... Elliot, why exactly did you come today? 'Cos, I gotta tell you, I'm not buying the whole "I just wanted a walk in the park" excuse."  
  
"I just wanted to see you, is there something wrong with that?"  
  
"You know damn well it is, Elliot. My God, I know I'm in the middle of a divorce, but technically I am still married. It's not easy being around you outside of work, Elliot, it's just not. I can't be around you and not think about..." She trailed off, stopping her sentence there.  
  
"Think about what, Liv? What is it that's so horrible that you can't bear to think about it."  
  
"That's not it," she said, shaking her head. "Please don't do this to me, Elliot. Not now, I can't deal with all of this. You know what it is I can't think about and you shouldn't either, not yet, not while I'm still married to Chris. Please Elliot, just drop it."  
  
"Drop what?"  
  
She shut her eyes in frustration, "This whole discussion! God, Elliot, you're not an idiot, you know what I mean."  
  
"What is so wrong about talking about it? I really don't see anything, Olivia. So please, inform me!"  
  
"I can't."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Because!." she yelled. She lowered her voice, hoping that she hadn't waken the girls. "Because, Elliot. I'm afraid of it."  
  
"Afraid of what?"  
  
"I can't. Please, Elliot," she pleaded with him. "Not now, not today."  
  
"Why not?" He repeated.  
  
"Because I love you!" She yelled. As soon as she did her hands flew to her mouth and she gasped. She hadn't meant to say that, it just sort of popped out. Cursing herself she sat in silence while Elliot sat with his jaw dropped, a shocked look on his face.  
  
"Well, uh..." he said slowly, his voice raspy. "Well-"  
  
"Don't." She stopped him. "Just ... leave."  
  
"What?" He asked, confused. "Why?"  
  
She shook her head, "Go, Elliot. Please, just go."  
  
"Olivia, I'm not goi-" He started to say, his own head shaking.  
  
"Elliot!," she stopped him. "Leave, before I say anything else I'll regret."  
  
He furrowed his brow, "You can't honestly regre-"  
  
"Go!" She said once more, sternly. He gave up with trying to convince her otherwise and stood, walking towards the door. He stopped in front of it and turned around.  
  
"We're not finished with this conversation," he told her. "Believe me, not even close."  
  
"I know," she said, her voice small and weak. "Just, not today."  
  
Without another word he turned around and left her apartment. She sighed and lied down on her couch, staring up at the ceiling.  
  
What had she done?  
  
XXXX  
  
What had he done?  
  
He left her apartment, but lingered in the hallway for a couple of minutes, his back resting against her door. He should have listened to her when she begged him not to get into that conversation, he knew that it was something that needed to wait. But, in his selfishness he pushed it aside. He wasn't thinking about how it would effect her, and now he regretted starting the whole discussion.  
  
But, she had said she loved him!  
  
Granted, afterwards she told him she regretted saying so. But, still, he knew that in telling him this she was being genuine. He could see it in her eyes after she realized what she had confessed. And, although he felt like a dick for bringing up the whole idea, nothing would take away how he felt when she had said that.  
  
He finally got the sense to walk away, she needed time, and he needed time. He wished she would have let him finish what he wanted to say, he would have told her how much he loved her, too. But, that was what she intended on preventing. This he knew, it made so much sense. Now that he knew she loved him if she knew he loved her things would start up, although these things were desired by both the timing was all wrong. He would have to wait to tell her how he felt.  
  
As he pulled away and started to drive home he thought of when he had kissed her, almost a month before. He told her he had done so, so that she wouldn't forget about him. That was a lie. He had kissed her out of pure selfishness, which was something he realized he needed to work on. He knew that she was going through a rough time, but still all he could think about was kissing her. So, he had done so. Looking back he realized how much of a mistake that had been, too.  
  
But, she loved him! Didn't that make everything better? The feelings he had for her were returned, now he knew for certain. So, wasn't he justified in kissing her earlier? Had she even loved him then? Did he make a mistake in kissing her? Should he have waited?  
  
He pulled into his parking space and turned his car off, then sat staring at the steering wheel. How was he going to face her at work tomorrow? She had stopped the conversation at such an early time, how could he go to work knowing she loved him and pretend like he didn't love her? It had worked up until then because he wasn't sure how she felt, but now that he knew things were that much more complicated. It wasn't going to be a walk in the park, that was for sure.  
  
What had he done?  
  
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A/N: I'm just going to say that I'm not very happy with this chapter, so if you're not very happy with this chapter I understand. It's all right, but I know I've had much better. And, trust me, it'll start to speed up. 


	13. Chapter Thirteen

Fall to Pieces  
  
Chapter Thirteen  
  
Disclaimer: As I've said many times before, they don't belong to me.  
  
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She had to talk herself into getting out of her car the next morning; the last thing that she wanted was to spend 8 hours, or more, with him. Slowly she walked into the station house, her eyes focused on the floor in front of her, or anything that was nowhere near his eyes, although she could feel them on her. As she sat down at her desk she heard him clear his throat, but didn't acknowledge him, or the fact that he had done so to get her attention. She immediately started working.  
  
To her dismay after an hour of paperwork they were out on a new case, a middle-aged woman was found raped and murdered in her apartment, Elliot drove them to them to the scene of the crime, but before she could get out of the car he stopped her. "We need to talk," he told her, locking the car door.  
  
She unlocked it manually, "No. What we need to do is investigate this rape-homicide." She got out of the car and walked towards the building, Elliot hot on her trail.  
  
"You're right," he started, "but before today is over, we will talk about this."  
  
"I wouldn't hold my breath If I were you, Elliot," she replied crisply as she pressed the buzzer. When they were buzzed in she kept briskly walking, hoping he wouldn't catch up. Unfortunately, he did. Grabbing her arm he turned her around to face him.  
  
"Olivia, you can't think I'm just going to forget about it. Trust me, it's not going to happen. We need to talk about it, whether we do that today or tomorrow, hell even the next day or two weeks from now, we will talk about it." They locked eyes, his had turned a darker shade of blue, she had only seen that happen when he was angry. But, he wasn't angry this time; they had darkened for a different reason. She shivered, pulled her arm away, and began to walk up the stairs to the third floor.  
  
"You can't keep running," he called out. When she kept walking he chased after her, in professional mode. They had a case to work.  
  
Nearly 11 hours later she left, it was almost 10 and there was nothing else that could be done so late, plus her girls were still at the babysitters. And, although Heather didn't make her pay much twelve hours of babysitting adds up. He was still sitting at his desk when she started to leave, his eyes glued to the papers scattered on his desk, and silently talking to himself. She knew to leave him be, when he obsessed over a case there was nothing she could do except hope he was smart enough to at least catch a few hours of sleep in the crib.  
  
"I'm leaving, Elliot." She said before she walked out the door, "Get some sleep, will ya? Just a couple of hours."  
  
He looked up from the desk, his eyes were already red and showing signs of tiredness. "Yeah, I will."  
  
She wasn't sure if he was lying to get her off of his case or telling the truth, though she hoped it was the latter. Nodding she pushed the door open and began to walk towards her car. She would call his cell when she got home and remind him once again to sleep, hopefully he would listen.  
  
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Around 45 minutes after she left his cell phone rang, he knew immediately that it was her, and that she would tell him again to sleep. She had done so for years, ever since she was partnered up with him. In all truths, if she hadn't reminded him so much to sleep he probably wouldn't. But he knew she would kick his ass otherwise, so he reassured her that at 12 he would sleep for a few hours. And he did, he ventured to the crib just after midnight and woke up around fifteen past three. After making a pot of coffee he went right back to work.  
  
She walked in 20 minutes past 5, with dark bags under her eyes and hair that looked like it hadn't been brushed in days. She sighed as she sat down at her desk and shuffled through the papers on her desk.  
  
"Couldn't sleep?" He asked.  
  
She shook her head, "Got about two hours, that's it. What about you? Did you sleep any?"  
  
He nodded, "A couple of hours, you want some coffee?"  
  
"Yeah," she sighed, "coffee would be great."  
  
He made each of them a cup and sat back down, "Where are the girls?"  
  
"They're at Heather's. I took them before coming here. Found anything good so far?"  
  
Another nod, "Our friend Mr. Rotherson lied to us, that golf course he claims to have been at wasn't opened on Sunday, in fact they haven't ever been opened on Sundays."  
  
"Really? He had a receipt though."  
  
He shrugged, "Must've forged it."  
  
"Can we get a warrant on anything?" She asked, flipping through the papers on her desk.  
  
"I'll ask Alex when she gets here, but it's still a bit early to call."  
  
"The hell it is, I'll call her." She pulled out her cell and dialed the ADA's number; she picked up after the second ring.  
  
"What?!?" She asked, not sounding too happy to have been woken so early. "Who is it?"  
  
"Alex? This is Olivia, about Rotherson, is there anything we can get a warrant for on him?"  
  
"What? I thought he had an alibi."  
  
"Not a real one, is there anything?"  
  
She thought a moment, "Well, his fingerprints were at the crime scene ... but any lawyer could argue that they knew each other. And with a dead victim, there's nobody to disagree."  
  
"They were on her body, Alex."  
  
"What time is it?"  
  
"About five thirty."  
  
Alex sighed, "Yeah, all right. I'll call around."  
  
They said their good-byes and Olivia hung up the phone, "She's gonna call around. Somebody's bound to give her one just to be able to get back to sleep," she sighed. "Have you talked to anybody from the lab?"  
  
"They only know what they told us earlier, she was suffocated. Cause of death was asphyxia."  
  
"What about the fluids?"  
  
"No DNA to compare it to, of course if we find anything in Rotherson's house then we can get a warrant for his DNA and test our theory." He looked at her with concern, "Why don't you go catch some sleep in the crib? You don't look so good. I promise I will wake you up as soon as I hear anything, all right?"  
  
She shook her head adamantly, "No, I need to stay awake."  
  
"There's nothing to do now but wait, Liv. Go and get some rest, Lord knows you need it a whole hell of a lot more than I do. As soon as Alex calls back I'll wake you up, I swear."  
  
She gave up, too exhausted to argue further. "Fine. But if I find out she called, no matter what it was about, and you didn't wake me up, I wi--"  
  
"All right, all right, I get it. No matter what she calls about I wake you up. Now go."  
  
She glared at him and pushed her seat back, then got up from it and began to walk towards the crib. Yawning she realized how tired she really was, she slowly walked up the stairs and when she made it to the crib and into a bed she fell asleep instantly.  
  
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Elliot hung up the phone and started towards the crib. It was just after six in the morning and Alex had just called back, they had their warrant. Besides him and Olivia there weren't very many people there, and Cragen was one of them. He stopped by his office before going to the crib to let him know what was going on, then went to wake Olivia.  
  
He almost felt bad about waking her; she had looked so tired only 30 something minutes prior. But, he knew she wouldn't care, as long as they had their warrant. She was asleep when he entered the crib, one leg hanging off of the bed and her head lying on one of her arms. As he neared towards the bed she was on she mumbled something and turned around, facing away from him.  
  
"Liv?" He asked, sitting down on a small open space. "Wake up," he gently shook her. She mumbled again, turning back towards him. "Olivia," he whispered into her ear, "come on ... we've got the warrant."  
  
She shot forward, fully awake. "When?"  
  
"Just a minute ago, come on, get ready. Alex is going to met us at him apartment."  
  
She jumped off of the bed and ran out of the crib, he followed her and by the time he made it down the stairs she was already ready. Munch and Fin were there, sitting at their desks and Cragen barked at them to go with. The four piled into a sedan and headed off for Rotherson's apartment, Olivia driving a bit too fast.  
  
Alex was waiting for them outside when they pulled up. She handed Olivia the papers, "You've got your search warrant."  
  
"Any restrictions?" She asked.  
  
Alex smiled, "None."  
  
Like a whirlwind Olivia raced into the building, Elliot following close behind. She was knocking on the door by the time Elliot and the others caught up with her, yelling out to Rotherson to "open the door, it's the police!" When he didn't answer she kicked the door in, then entered the apartment with her gun raised.  
  
Before Elliot had the chance to enter he heard her yell out, "Drop the gun!"  
  
XXXX  
  
"Drop the gun!" She yelled out, her own weapon trained on Rotherson. She inched further into the house, so Elliot and the others could enter. "Do it, Rotherson!" She called out, tightening her finger on the trigger of her gun.  
  
Elliot came in behind her, his own gun ready. "Listen to her, Rotherson," he called out.  
  
Rotherson cocked his head to one side and looked away from Olivia and at Elliot, his gun following his eyes. Olivia watched closely as he mimicked her earlier actions, his finger tightening the trigger.  
  
"Drop it, I'll shoot!"  
  
Rotherson laughed bitterly, cocking his gun, which was now aimed back at her. When his finger began to tighten on the trigger again she heard a sickly familiar boom ringing in her ears. Rotherson faltered and fell into a crumpled heap on the floor of his apartment. She looked down at the gun in her hands, it wasn't smoking ... had she pulled the trigger? No, she hadn't.  
  
She looked over at Elliot, his gun, however, was smoking. He dropped his arm; it laid limply at his side. Munch and Fin went to check on Rotherson, Munch on his cell calling a bus, Fin trying to stop the bleeding in Rotherson's stomach. Olivia put her own gun away and walked over to Elliot, who was silently talking to either himself or her.  
  
"He was going to shoot you," he whispered. "Bastard was about to shoot you."  
  
She covered his hand with hers and gently took the gun away, "I know ... you did the right thing."  
  
He looked into her eyes, a shocked expression still lingering in his. "I love you, Olivia. I hope you to know that."  
  
She half-smiled, "I do...." Sighing she said, "IAB will be wanting your gun and your badge, Elliot."  
  
He nodded and pulled his badge out, handing it to her. "Are you all right?" He asked, concern filling his voice.  
  
"I'm not the one who just shot somebody. How are you doing?"  
  
"I've been through it before..." he looked over to where Munch and Fin were caring for Rotherson. "I'll be fine," he said quietly.  
  
Olivia took hold on his hand with her free one, and their fingers intertwined. "Come on," she said, "let's go wait for the bus."  
  
Elliot nodded and they walked out of the apartment, hand in hand, and down the stairs. When Olivia saw Tucker pull up she let go of his hand and went to talk with him, giving him Elliot's badge and gun. He listened to her side of the story and then pulled Elliot away to hear what he had to say, around the same time the bus pulled up and Olivia directed them to where Rotherson was.  
  
When they came out, Rotherson on a stretcher covered by a black sheet, she looked over at Elliot, who was still talking with IAB Agent Tucker. The two locked eyes and she frowned; his eyes followed the stretcher until the doors to the ambulance shut. He then looked over at Tucker and started talking again.  
  
Olivia sighed and went upstairs, back to Rotherson's apartment where Munch and Fin still were.  
  
"How's he doing?" Munch inquired, hanging up his cell.  
  
Olivia sighed, "He'll be fine."  
  
XXXX  
  
A/N: Yeah, well. Anyway, you know what to do. Press that little bluish-purplish button and send me something nice! 


	14. Chapter Fourteen

Fall to Pieces  
  
Chapter Fourteen  
  
Disclaimer: See first chapter  
  
XXXX  
  
Olivia hung up the phone with Heather and settled back into her paperwork, she would be working for many more hours, there was a lot of paperwork to do. Across from her Elliot sat at his own desk, doing his own paperwork, eyes red and puffy from lack of sleep and physical and mental strain. Munch and Fin were, like them, sitting at their desks writing. The rest of the day would probably go accordingly.  
  
The cause of all of this was, of course, Rotherson. Despite the fact that he was now in the morgue they still had loose ends in their case that had yet to be tied together. As soon as his body arrived there (the morgue) his DNA was taken for a sample and was currently being processed, with hopes that the results would be back within the hour.  
  
She was exhausted, her head ached, and she felt like screaming. This wasn't all together uncommon; she was normally plagued with these things when she worked a case, most cases, in fact. So it didn't bother her as much as it would most, but that didn't mean it didn't get to her. She had taken Advil for her headache, and that wasn't working, and there really wasn't anything she could do about the others. So, she would have to just deal with it. Like she normally did.  
  
She glanced across the desk to look at Elliot; he seemed to be having a harder time than she was, which was understandable. He had, of course, just shot and killed a man, and while it hadn't been the first time he had done so, she knew that it never got easier. Along with eyes that showed a significant lack of sleep, his shoulders slumped and his face was pale and sunken. He caught her looking and his eyes narrowed, as if to ask her what was wrong. She shook her head, answering without speaking; they both went back to their work.  
  
About forty-five minutes later ME Warner called, the results of the DNA testing had come back. Both samples-the semen and the skin from under the victim's fingernails-matched to Michael Rotherson; there was no room for error. They had their perp, case closed. Miraculously, at the same time, another case closed. It seemed that this case wasn't Rotherson's first, he had raped another woman, almost 4 and a half years prior. The MO was a bit different, but again there was an exact match to Rotherson's DNA. That victim had also died, so the only thing for them to do was contact her family, give them some well overdue closure. And, of course, more paperwork.  
  
Five hours later she looked up from her paperwork, feeling lightheaded and ready to pass out from fatigue. Her phone rang and after letting out a groan she answered it, "Detective Benson."  
  
"Mommy!" An energetic voice called out through the phone.  
  
"Hey, Cassie." She said, a small smile forming and spreading across her face. "What do you need, honey?"  
  
"Nothing," the seven-year-old said, "I miss you."  
  
"Well, I miss you too honey, but mommy has a lot of work to do."  
  
"When will you pick us up?" The young girl asked, her voice filled with hope.  
  
"I don't know, honey. Maybe soon, maybe not. I wish I could tell you."  
  
The young girl was quite for a while, then sighed into the phone. "Ok, momma. I love you."  
  
"I love you, too. Goodbye, Cassandra." She hung up the phone with a sigh and settled back into her paperwork. It was going to be a long, long day.  
  
XXXX  
  
At the end of the work day he stacked his to-do papers in one nice, big pile on his desk and sighed as he reached for his coat. Munch and Fin had already gone home but Olivia was still sitting at the desk in front of his, chewing on the end of her pen like she always did. She hurriedly wrote something down sloppily, as a result of writing for hours and hours her handwriting had gotten rushed.  
  
As he got up from his chair she looked up, a frown on her face. "You leaving?"  
  
He nodded, "You should too, go get your girls."  
  
"Yeah," she said. "I thought you would want to talk though, I was waiting for you to finish."  
  
"Go see your girls," he said, shaking his head. "I'll be just find."  
  
"Bullshit, Elliot. You're forgetting that I know you, I know you need to talk about this, so here I am, talk."  
  
He sighed, "How about this, you go pick your girls up from the babysitters, feed them, help them with their homework, give them their baths, watch TV with them, tuck them into bed, then call me and I'll come over. Alright?"  
  
"It's a plan," she said. "I'll see you later, so don't think you're going to get out of this, ok?"  
  
He smiled, "I wouldn't dream of it."  
  
She gathered her things together as he left the station, and then she too began to leave. She dropped in on the Captain to tell him goodnight, he looked up at him with the same frown she had given Elliot only moments before.  
  
"You talked with him about it yet?" He asked.  
  
"Not yet," she said shaking her head, "later."  
  
"Good," he said, "good."  
  
She nodded and told him goodbye, then got into her car and drove to Heather's house, picked up the girls, then went out to eat.  
  
XXXX  
  
It was nearly 10 o'clock when she finally got around to calling him; he picked up on the second ring. "Stabler."  
  
"Hey, El. It's me, the girls are in bed, you ready to talk?"  
  
"Yeah," he sighed, "I'll come over right now."  
  
They hung up with each other and she put on a cup of coffee. While she waited she went into the girls' bedroom and watched them as they slept. Their patterns were usual, Becca was mumbling incoherently and Cassie was snoring lightly. Nearly 15 minutes later she heard a light knock and the front door and quietly left the room to let Elliot in.  
  
He looked worse then than he had hours before at the precinct, he staggered into her apartment, shoulders slumped and smelling of alcohol, but not so much that she would think him drunk. Nonetheless, his walking had obviously been effected so she helped him over to her couch and set him down, seeing for the first time the dark, purple bruise around his eye.  
  
"What happened?" She demanded, headed into her kitchen to get some ice.  
  
He didn't answer her and when she came back into the living room he was laid out on the couch, appearing asleep. But, she knew him well enough to know he was faking it, and proceeded in sitting him up straight. "Oh no you don't," she told him as she pressed the ice over his eye, causing him to wince. "Now, tell me how this," she gestured towards the ice hiding the bruise, "happened."  
  
"Pissed off the wrong person." he shrugged, "I miscalculated the time it would take for his fist to hit my face. No big deal."  
  
"'No big deal' my ass," she said angrily, " I hope you thought to press charges."  
  
He shook his head, "Actually, he thought not to."  
  
"What do you mean?" She asked, a confused tone in her voice.  
  
"I hit him first," he told her, "not as hard as he hit me, though."  
  
"What the hell does that have to do with anything?"  
  
He shrugged again, "Dunno."  
  
She sighed, "How much did you have to drink?"  
  
"2 beers."  
  
"Why did you hit him?"  
  
"He was in my way."  
  
"How was he in your way?"  
  
"What is this, 20 questions? He was in my way, not that hard to understand. It's not anymore complicated than it sounds, Liv, he was just in my way."  
  
"So you hit him?"  
  
"I wasn't in the best mood."  
  
She rolled her eyes, "Yeah, well I figured as much. I swear, Elliot, you're more trouble than the girls are. You know you're extremely lucky that he didn't press charges, right?"  
  
Yet another shrug.  
  
"How long ago was this?"  
  
"Right before you called me."  
  
She looked at her watch; it was almost 11 o'clock. Sighing she said, "Do you want to talk about this morning?"  
  
"It's either you or the Huang. You're better looking, so I choose you."  
  
"Don't joke," she told him. "I'm asking you seriously, Elliot, I want a serious response. Do you want to talk about what happened or not? I just want to help."  
  
"I was being serious," he said. "You think Huang is better looking?"  
  
"Elliot," she warned.  
  
"Fine, let's talk. He was going to shoot you, I shot him, end of story."  
  
"No, not 'end of story', that's just the beginning of the story. What did Tucker say to you?"  
  
"Oh, Tucker? He was surprisingly believing, didn't accuse me of killing the guy just because we had picked him as our doer. Actually, he didn't accuse me of anything; it was a bit odd now that I think about it. Maybe he got laid."  
  
Olivia eyed him suspiciously, "Are you sure you only had two beers? Nothing else? No vodka, Jack Daniels, anything?"  
  
"Nope, just the beer."  
  
"Hmm," she sighed. "That man didn't hit you upside your head, did he? No concussions?"  
  
"No, why?"  
  
"I'm trying to find an excuse for your acting like a 15-year-old. Come on, Elliot, I asked you to be serious with me, I expect that you do."  
  
The seriousness in her voice finally got to him and he sobered, sitting straight and looking her in the eyes. "Fine, I'll talk. Ok, first of all, you don't need to be worried about me. I understand why you are, you've been in the same situation that I have, you know how hard it is to deal with. But Olivia, I'm fine, trust me that's the truth. While it's not easy knowing that you've killed somebody that man was scum. He raped women and was about to kill you, and God help me but I'm not sorry he's dead, it doesn't make me feel guilty to know that I took his life away, because now he can never hurt another woman, whereas if we took him to court he could have gotten away. Now, that's not a confession or anything, don't tell that to Tucker, but I'm not going to loose any sleep over what happened this morning. It's not going to cause me any distress or make me have a mental breakdown or anything, ok?"  
  
"But it did cause you to go drink and punch somebody for the simple fact that he was in your way? Gotta tell you, Elliot, but that really doesn't make any sense to me."  
  
"If you must know, Olivia, I punched that man because he was a pig. There was a young woman at the bar, probably mid twenties, and he was hitting on her. As he got drunker and drunker his slurs got even more inappropriate and degrading, until he finally tried to get her attention by invading her personal space and forcing her to dance with him. I noticed, asked him politely to leave her alone, then when he wouldn't told him I was a cop and would arrest him for harassing her if he didn't cease and deists, still he was unfazed. So, I resorted to violence."  
  
"Oh," she said quietly. "I'm sorry."  
  
"Don't be."  
  
She nodded, looking down at her hands.  
  
"You know," he said, "when Rotherson had his gun pointing at you the only thing that I could think of was that I never got to tell you how I felt, I never got to _really_ kiss you, or make love to you, and how much I was going to regret it if you were gone. I shot him on instinct, but I wasn't thinking of you as a partner, it scared me. I thought that I would be able to deal with having these feelings for you, maybe I won't."  
  
She took his hand into hers and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "Your mind was on work enough to focus on keeping me safe, whether it was as your partner or something else. I don't see a problem with that, you don't have anything to be worried about, I know that if we were to ever be together you would be able to separate work and relationship."  
  
"Yeah, maybe." He looked down at their hands and intertwined their fingers. "That's why I had to tell you though, I wanted to make sure you knew, just in case."  
  
"I already knew," she told him. "I think I've always known."  
  
He looked back up at her. "So," he said, "now that we know how we feel, what do we do about it?"

XXXX  
  
A/N: I know, I know, it took so long for me to get this chapter out. Sorry! But, I've had a hectic week, and I'm going to have another! Monday I have bible study at church, Tuesday I have a friend who's acting in a play that I have to go see, Wednesday I have to go to a nursing home for Leadership class, and then youth. After that we're all going out to eat because it's a friend of mines 18th birthday. Thursday, not so sure, but I do think I've got something to do then. Friday is Football night, of course. Then the weekends are always crazy...ugh. Y'all are lucky that I'm getting this chapter out, I should be working on my psychology paper (ahh! It's due Monday). Anyway, gotta go work on that then.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Fall to Pieces

Chapter 15

Disclaimer: Not mine, yadda yadda yadda.

XXXX

She pulled her hand out of his and folded her arms across her chest, "Nothing." She said, "We don't do anything because I'm still in the process of getting a divorce. God, Elliot, how many times do I have to tell you?"

He sighed, "Until it doesn't sound like an excuse to distance yourself from me." He tugged her at her hand and intertwined their fingers again, "I'm not letting you go, Olivia...don't even try to push me away."

"I'm not trying to," she told him, looking away. "What I'm going through right now you couldn't even imagine. For Christ's sake, Elliot, I'm just now going through a divorce!" She tried to pull back, but Elliot kept hold of her. "Things aren't as easy as 'I'm in love with you so everything's going to work out in perfect', you're dreaming if you think it is. I can't just embrace the way I feel, Elliot, because up until a few months ago I wasn't allowed to love you, up until a couple of months ago I was married to Chris. Hell, I still am married to Chris, which is why we can't do anything right now." She pulled away again, this time he let her go. Scooting back she continued, "Do you get it?"

"I understand that this isn't easy on you," Elliot told her, "but it's not easy for me either. I wasn't the only one who couldn't have certain feelings, and for the same reasons. When you and Chris were still together I had to keep myself from feeling anything for you, because I knew that there could never be anything between us, I didn't expect you to feel the same way for me and I sure as hell didn't think you would ever leave him. I thought that you were happy, so I kept my distance, and it wasn't exactly the easiest thing I've ever done. So, before you go and tell me that I have no idea how hard things have been for you maybe you should stop to think how this has been effecting me."

She sighed, "I never said that it was easy for you, Elliot. I said that it was a whole hell of a lot harder for me."

"I don't doubt that," he said. "But how will you know that things won't get easier if you don't try? Who knows, maybe things will surprise you, maybe things will only get better from here."

She rolled her neck, popping it. "What if they don't Elliot? What if they just get worse and worse? What happens then?"

"Then we make things better." He scooted closer to her, picking up her hands in his. "I love you Olivia," he told her, cupping her face in his hands. "If somewhere along the line something goes wrong we'll get through it, I love you too much to give up if we hit a bump in the road. You should know at least that much."

She covered one of his hands with her own, "I'm scared, Elliot." She confessed, "What if we can't work through things? What if we turn up like Chris and I?"

He stroked her cheek soothingly, "I promise you, Olivia, we won't turn out that way." He leaned in closer and kissed her on the forehead, "I swear."

"What if you're wrong though," she said. "You can't know for sure that if we start something it won't end horribly. I don't want to be hurt again, I've gone through it once, I didn't like it."

"I would never hurt you," he said dropping his hands from her face.

"How can you be so sure?" She asked, her eyes wide and brimming with tears he knew she would never allow to fall. "What if it's non intentional? The truth it, Elliot, that you can't see the future so you don't know what is going to happen."

"I love you enough to know that I would never willingly hurt you, Olivia, that's proof enough for me. Yes, things might not be perfect, but whatever happens I know that we could get through anything. You just have to be willing to try." He paused, searching her eyes for some indication of her feelings, all he could see was confusion. "If you're not ready, Olivia, just tell me. I'll wait for you."

She blinked and a tear rolled down her cheek, furiously she brushed it away and broke eye contact with him, looking down at her hands folded across her lap. "That's just it, Elliot." She said, her voice thick and shaky, "I'm not sure if I'm ready or not. I just ... I need some time to think things over, get my bearings straight, I've got a lot of things to deal with right now." She looked back up, her brown eyes were dark and shimmering with the held back tears, "I'm sorry."

Cupping her face in his hands again he kissed her gently on the lips, "Don't be." Letting go he stood up from the couch and walked to the apartment door, pausing only when he got there to take one last look at her. She covered her mouth in a vain attempt to hide a sob and looked away, more stubborn tears streaming down her face.

He opened the door to the apartment and stepped out into the hallway, closing it softly behind him. As he walked down the hallway he ran a hand over his head and massaged his neck. Opting to walk down the stairs rather than taking the elevator he took his keys from his pocket and let out a loud, frustrated sigh.

He needed a beer.

XXXX

Throwing the beer bottle into the garbage she cringed at the loud clanging noise that followed. How did he have this effect on her? How could he leave her feeling complete, unadulterated happiness and yet at the same time empty and alone? She wiped away another defiant tear and grabbed another beer from her fridge, she just needed to think, and boy did she have plenty of things to think about.

This is all his fault, she told herself, if he wasn't so damn perfect in the first place I wouldn't so much of an emotional wreck.

Which, was both true and false in its own way. Of course it was her fault that she couldn't make up her mind, but it was also his fault for giving her this ultimatum of sorts. Taking a sip of her beer she walked in long strides to the living room, her mind going over various incidents that had occurred all in the past couple of months; the fight with Chris, kissing Elliot in the hallway of his apartment, their discussion the night she bought her apartment, confession her love to him, him shooting Rotherson, then telling her how he felt, then their conversation nearly three hours prior. Slumping down on the couch she glanced at the clock, it was already after two in the morning, there was no way she would be getting any sleep anytime soon.

What good was she doing by running away from him anyway? It only delayed the inevitable, she knew that there was no way she could forget how she felt, for the simple fact that she didn't want to forget. So, how was this helping? Drinking beer whilst thinking about her options didn't exactly have the best of results. Was he right? If she finally allowed herself to be happy would things get better? What would happen if they got worse, could they get through any obstacle? What if they couldn't? How would that change things at work? Would she be able to pretend like there had never been anything between they whilst working along side him? No, that wasn't possible. But, things not working wasn't an option, like he had said, they would make things work no matter what should come their way.

She took a long drag of her beer, emptying it. Setting it down on the coffee table in front of her she sighed, why did love have to be so damn frustrating? Figuring that there was no answer to that question she gave up on trying to figure it out, and went back to her thinking things over.

It was going to be a long, long night.

XXXX

He dropped the beer bottle into the garbage and watched it as it fell, then clang with the other bottle lying haphazardly in the can. It was his fourth that whole night, deciding four was enough he left the kitchen empty handed, turning the light off as he did so. Lying down on his couch he began to feel drowsy, it was almost three in the morning, he should have gone to sleep long before.

It wasn't long before he was starting to drift off to sleep and shortly after that snoring fairly loudly on his couch. At half after four he was awaken to the sound of rushed knocking at the door to his apartment.

Opening his eyes wide in an attempt to wake up further he slid off of his couch and made his way to the door. When he looked out the peephole he was surprised to see Olivia on the other side, looking highly agitated. Confused he opened the door to let her in, it must have been raining outside because she was soaked.

"Olivia?" He asked, "What is it?"

She walked inside and stood in the middle of the apartment, arms folded across her chest, shivering. She didn't say anything, just stood there, staring at him with a strange intensity.

He took a step towards her, then another. She watched him walked to her, her head cocked to one side, obviously thinking about something. She continued to shiver, but said nothing of being cold. When he got close enough he could see her teeth chattering. "Olivia, you're freezing," he said placing a hand on her arm, "let me get you something to change into."

She wrapped her arms tighter around her body and nodded, he could feel her watching him as he walked to his bedroom. Grabbing some sweat pants and a t shirt for her to change into he wondered where the girls were. When he walked back into the living room she was still standing exactly where she had been, her brown eyes following him as he neared.

As he handed the clothes to her his hand brushed against her arm, he noticed her tremble and she pulled back, looking away.

"Olivia?" He questioned. She just shook her head and walked off towards the bathroom. Confused he walked into the kitchen and put on a pot of coffee. As he was doing so he heard footfall behind him and turned to see Olivia standing awkwardly in the middle of the kitchen, one arm lying at her side the other across her chest. Her eyes darted around the room before they settled on him.

"I've been thinking," she said as their eyes locked.

"Oh?" He asked, "What about?"

She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, "What you said earlier...about how you can't really know how something is going to turn out unless you try."

He took a step closer, expecting for her to move back. She didn't. "And...?"

"And," she said, "I've come to a conclusion."

"Really?" He stepped closer again, again she didn't move. "What did you find?"

She licked her lips and furrowed her bow. Sighing she said, "That...maybe you were right."

"Huh..." he said, "Imagine that."

This time she was the one to step closer, "Earlier, when I said I needed time..." She trailed off, looking over his shoulder at something unimportant.

"I remember," he said, crossing his arms across his chest.

She began to chew on her lower lip, still looking over his shoulder. "I may or may not have been telling the whole truth."

"Oh?"

She looked back at him, their eyes locked and she stepped closer again. "I, uh, I think that I'm ready."

He took a step forward, "You think?"

She stood straight and nodded, "I'm sure."

"You're ready?"

She smiled, "I'm ready."

The space between them had been significantly closed, and she stood a step or two away from him. "And..." he said, closing the gap between them, "you came to this ... revelation just now?"

"About half an hour ago," she said, nodding, "yeah."

"Well," he said, smiling. "What do you propose we do about this epiphany of yours?"

She shrugged, "I haven't really thought about it." Then, smiling she nonchalantly added, "You could always kiss me and make up for lost time."

"Good idea," he said, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her closer to him. Grinning she rested her forearms on his shoulders, her fingers intertwined behind his neck. Leaning forward he closed the small gap that existed between them.

At first the kiss was soft and gentle at first, but Olivia pulled him closer and parted her lips to deepen it, Elliot made no objections. When they broke away they were both breathless and panting for air. Elliot ran a hand through her short hair and pulled her back into another deep, passionate kiss, this continued for many minutes, accordingly.

By five o'clock in the morning they were in the living room, Elliot was sitting on the couch and Olivia was lying sideways with her head on his lap while he played with her hair. Her eyelids felt heavy and she began to drift off to sleep, as did Elliot.

When she was almost asleep he yawned loudly, causing her to snap back awake. She slowly rose and looked at him, "It's Saturday, you know. We don't have work."

He smiled, "I guess I forgot."

"Go to sleep. I'll come by later."

"What about you? You've got the girls, how are you going to get any sleep?"

"They're at Heather's house, I gave her some money to take them to a movie. I'm going to go home and sleep."

"Why waste the time?" He asked, "You can stay here, take the guest bed."

She nodded and kissed him, "I'll see you when I wake up then."

He kissed her back, "Yeah. Sweet dreams."

She smiled and slid off of the couch, sleepily padding across the hardwood floors and towards the guest room. Pausing momentarily outside the room her mind flashed back to when Elliot had kissed her in the hallway, causing her to shiver. Smiling to herself she opened the door to the room, thanked God that it had no window, and slid under the covers of the queen sized bed that was located in the middle of the room.

It had been a long, long night.

XXXX

A/N: Alright, so it took me forever to update but I took my day off of school and wrote this chapter, even though I was tempted to stop and sleep (woke up a bit early, well for a day off at least). Anyway, tell me what'cha think.


	16. Chapter Sixteen

Fall to Pieces 

Chapter 16

Disclaimer: Well ... as much as I hate to admit this, the show's not mine (of course, you'd know if it was because Kathy would no longer be an issue...)

XXXX

10:03 am

He quietly closed the bedroom door behind him, walking through the hallway and into the living room. She wasn't anywhere to be seen, he assumed that she was still asleep and decided to let her remain so for the time being. He was sure that she could use the rest, apparently she hadn't slept any before she arrived at his apartment.

A shrill 'beep' stole his attention; one of their cell phones must have been left on. He quickly got off of the couch and started to search for the phone, in hopes of finding it before it woke Olivia. It beeped again, the noise came from his right, he turned around and his eyes fell on the device. It was Olivia's.

He picked it up and began to shut it off, until he noticed 'one missed call' flash across the screen. Thinking that it could have something to do with the girls he pressed the 'menu' button, scrolling down until he came to received calls, then selected it.

He was surprised to find that the call had come from Chris. According to Olivia he hadn't called her in nearly a month, so what did he want? Deciding that it was none of his business he turned the phone off, setting it back down where he found it.

Turning back around he found himself looking at Olivia. "Hey," he greeted, walking towards here. "When did you wake up?"

"A little while ago," she replied. "Did somebody call, or was my battery dead?"

"Both, but it was beeping so I turned it off. You don't mind," he asked, "do you?"

"Why would I?" She questioned, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. "Who called?"

He paused, wondering if he should tell her. "Well," he started; she did have the right to know. "It was Chris," he finally said, sitting down on the couch. "Has he been calling for a while ... or is this something new?"

She walked across the room, sat next to him on the couch, and sighed. "He calls every now and then, I let him talk to the girls sometimes, he may be a jackass, but he's still their father. No matter how much I'd like to I can't fill that void," her hands had suddenly become very interesting and she looked down to inspect them. "He wants to see them ... I think I might let him." She paused, glancing up at him to see his reaction; "Do you think I should?"

"It's not for me to say, Olivia."

"I know," she said, "but what you think matters to me." She shrugged half-way and looked back down at her hands, "He wants to see them because he's moving. He ... ah ... is dating a woman who lives in Pennsylvania; he's going to get a transfer to some hospital there. I guess he wants to say goodbye." Her voice suddenly grew angry, "I don't understand how he can just leave them like that, I know I haven't been the most cooperative person but I had every damn right not to. That doesn't mean he can just pick up and leave, they need him ... even if I don't, they do." She gritted her teeth, "If he think that I'm going to be the one to tell them then he's more of an idiot than I thought."

"I don't want to argue with you, Olivia ... but maybe him moving will be a good thing, for all of you. Let's face it, he's not the best father there ever was and with him out of the state they might be able to finally move on ... maybe you will too."

She looked up at him, her mouth slightly hanging open. "I ... Elliot ... you know I'm over Chris." Her head cocked to one side and she looked at him through confused eyes, "Right?"

"You may be over him, Olivia, but there's no way you could have fallen out of love with him so quickly."

"I never said I didn't love him anymore," she said nonchalantly. "I said that I was over him, they're not the same thing. I was married to him for seven years, Elliot; we dated for over a year before that, I think a part of me will always love him. He gave me two beautiful girls, if anything I'll always love him for that. But, Elliot, I'm not in love with him anymore, I love you." She smiled and reached over to caress his cheek, "You don't have anything to be worried about. I want to be with you."

A grin broke out across his face, "His loss, my gain."

"Oh, is that a line?" She said with a laugh, "Elliot Stabler, I never would have figured you the guy to use corny lines. This is a disappointment."

"You know you love it," he said pulling her close to him, capturing her lips with him own.

She smiled into the kiss and pulled back, "I do ... God help me for it, but I do."

XXXX

"Did they behave?" Olivia whispered to Heather, glancing at her youngest daughter asleep on the couch in the woman's living room.

Heather smiled, "They were angels, like always. I swear, I don't understand how they're so well behaved, mine are like hoodlums." When Olivia handed her some money she pushed it away, "You're a single mother now, Olivia. You need your money; we've got plenty. Keep it and bring the girls back anytime, Robbie loves Becca's company during the day and Cassie and Maia have so much fun together."

"I feel like I'm dumping them on you," Olivia said with a sigh. "I wish I had more time to spend with them, but with my work hours...." She smiled at Heather, "Thank you so much, I'll see you on Monday morning."

"Alright, drive safely."

Olivia gently picked Becca up from the couch; the two-year-old stirred but didn't wake and snuggled into her mother's chest. Olivia glanced over at Heather, "Is Cassie asleep in Maia's room?"

She nodded.

"I'll go get her," Elliot said, speaking for the first time. He disappeared down the hallway and then a few seconds later emerged with Cassie asleep in his arms. She mumbled something in her sleep and wrapped her arms around his neck, resting her head on his shoulder. Olivia felt a smile forming and said goodbye to Heather, making her way out of the apartment and down the stairs as carefully as she could without waking the sleeping child in her arms. Elliot did the same and it took them a little longer to get down the stairs than it normally would.

Olivia placed Becca in her car seat and Elliot sat Cassie in her seat and put her seatbelt on for her, neither girl woke. Olivia drove Elliot home and shut off the car when she stopped in front of his apartment building. They both got out and he met her on the drivers' side of the car.

"You three could just stay here tonight," he whispered. "The guest bed is big enough for you all to fit."

She smiled at the offer, "It's ok, Elliot. Thanks anyway." She sighed and leaned back on the car, "I think I'm going to call Chris back tomorrow, set something up so he can say goodbye to the girls in person. I think he leaves in two weeks."

"If you think that's best for the girls then you should." He stepped forward and rested his hands on her hips, pulling her off of the car and closer to him. "Will you call me, too?"

She laughed quietly, "Of course." Kissing him she added, "I'll call you first, if it makes you feel better."

He nodded and kissed her, "It would make me feel much better." He kissed her again, this time more deeply than the first two times. Breaking away he smiled, "I love you."

"I love you, too." She replied, kissing him quickly. "I've gotta get these two youngins to bed. I'll talk to you tomorrow, ok?"

"Alright, bye."

"Goodnight Elliot."

She moved to open the car door but he pulled her back to him, silencing her objections with his lips. She didn't protest and allowed the kiss to deepen, bringing her arms around his neck to keep her balance. When the broke for air she smiled at him, "What was that for?" she asked.

He shrugged, "No reason." He moved to kiss her again but she pulled back.

"I've got to get the girls home, Elliot."

He made a face, "Fine. Come by tomorrow?"

"I'll try," she promised. Stepping off the curb and opening her car door she glanced back at him with a smile, "Goodnight, again, Elliot."

"Night," he said walking backwards towards the apartment building. "I'll see you tomorrow."

She laughed, "Maybe."

"Wishful thinking," he said with a shrug. "Bye, Liv."

She shut the door and turned on the car, rolling the window down she said goodbye to him and drove off towards her home, Becca and Cassie still sleeping in the backseat.

She glanced in the mirror at them, to make sure that they hadn't waken. Sighing to herself she wondered how she was going to deal with seeing Chris again, and worse, how were the girls going to take the news that their father was leaving ... for good? XXXX

A/N: I know it was kind of short but ... yeah. Let me know what'cha think.


	17. Chapter Seventeen

Fall to Pieces 

Chapter 17

Disclaimer: Yeah, yeah, whatever. They, in no way, belong to me.

XXXX

It was almost ten o'clock in the morning, the girls were still sleeping, and she had been awake for nearly three hours, yet she still hadn't gathered the courage to pick up the phone and call him. She mentally berated herself, it shouldn't be so hard to call him, she had been married to him for years, how could this be so complicated? Once again she pressed the 'on' button and dialed the first five numbers, before nervousness consumed her and she ended the call. At least she was doing better than the last time, she had only gotten the first three numbers then ... she was making progress, at this rate she would call him by noon.

The clock read five till ten; the girls would be waking up soon. Sighing to herself she remembered her promise to Elliot, she would call him first. She dialed his number and waited for him to pick up, he did so on the second ring.

"Stabler," came his voice, nonchalant, from the other end.

"Hey," she greeted with a sigh. "So ... I called."

"I can see that," he replied. "Did the girls get to sleep alright?"

"Yeah, they're still sleeping right now. Lucky things." Another sigh, "Elliot, this is going to be a lot harder than I thought it would."

"Talking to Chris?" He asked.

"Uh-huh, I don't know how I'm going to do it. All I know is that the last thing that I want to do right now is talk to him, or have my girls talk to him." She confessed, "I just want him to leave and never have to see him again ... it would be so much easier that way."

"How do you think that would make the girls feel?" Elliot asked her, trying his best to understand a situation that he had no experience with. "How would their father just up and leaving effect them?"

Olivia sighed into the phone, "You're right ... and I know that, but I still don't want to do this." She fell quiet momentarily, "Am I being terribly selfish?"

"I think you've got the right too," he assured her. "Nobody expects for this to be easy on you, Olivia."

"...I don't want to be alone, Elliot."

"I could come with you, if it would make you feel any better." He offered.

"I would," she said with a sigh of relief. "It would make me feel a lot better, thank you."

"Just call me and let me know when this is happening, alright?"

She nodded, though she knew he couldn't see her do so. "I will ... bye, El."

"I'll talk to you later," he said before hanging up.

10:02, the clock said. Seven minutes had passed since she had last looked at it. Seven less minutes that she had to gain the courage to dial the seven-digit number. This was not going so well. She held the phone in her hands, staring down at the buttons, it wasn't that hard of a number three fives, two fours, one, then another four. That was it, 555-4414, how was it that such a simple number caused such a big ordeal?

555-441.... She hung the phone up, a curse escaping her lips as she did so. God, how could such a mundane task be so frustrating? She tried again ... 555-44..., even less than the previous try. Not good ... this was not good.

10:06. Four more minutes gone. She began to pace in the living room. Pass the coffee table and to the TV, then turn around, walk past the coffee table again and then to the end of the living room, repeat. The next time she looked at the clock it was 10:11; five minutes had passed. She hurled the phone at the couch and held in a scream; the girls were still asleep, she didn't want to wake them up. Staring across the room at the phone on the couch she realized how silly she was being, it was only a phone call, it wasn't as hard as she was making it out to be.

She walked across the room and picked the phone back; determined to make the call. With shaking hands she dialed the number, 555-4414. It started to ring, one time, two times, three times. The phone clicked, somebody had answered. She held her breath and waited.

"Hello?" A woman's voice; unfamiliar. It must be Chris' new girlfriend, but the voice sounded so young.

She must have been silent for a long time because the next time the woman spoke her voice was harsh and agitated. "Hello? Is anybody there?"

Olivia couldn't think of anything to say; her words were fleeting. She opened her mouth in an attempt to speak but before she could get a word out the woman spoke again.

"Listen, if you're not going to say anyth-" She spat out coldly, Olivia cut her off before she could finish her sentence.

"Put Chris on the phone," she demanded with a meek voice, her hands started to shake again.

The woman was quiet for a moment, then she replied. "Who is this?"

Olivia was taken off guard by the sudden change of tone in her voice. "This is Olivia," she finally managed. "I need to speak with Chris."

"Chris!" She heard the woman's muffled voice call out, "Telephone!"

There was a pause, then Olivia heard Chris ask who was on the line. "It's your wife," the woman replied. "She said that she needs to talk to you, it sounds important."

There was a grunt, the sound of the phone being passed from one person to the other, and then he spoke. "What is it?"

"When do you leave?" She asked, sitting down on the couch once more.

"Two days," he spat out bitterly. "Why do you care?" Olivia bit her tongue, considering hanging up on him and letting him go without saying goodbye to the girls. The way he had treated her and the way he was acting now, he didn't deserve the chance.

"I don't," she sneered, just as bitterly. "I just thought that maybe you might want to tell your children goodbye. You remember them right? Or, do you not care about them anymore, either?"

He snorted, "See my kids? I'm sure that's what you've got planned. Listen, Olivia, I know the terms of that damn restraining order you put on me, I can't come within 200 feet of my girls. If I believe you and go to say goodbye what's to stop your hot-headed boyfriend from arresting me and taking my place as their father? He's already screwing my wife ... he might as well have the kids too."

"Elliot and I aren't sleeping together, Chris." Olivia said with disbelief, "And you should be ashamed at that piss-poor excuse you just gave me. Why the hell would I throw you in jail for seeing the girls if it's the last time you can before leaving for another state?"

"Because you can," he said nonchalantly.

"Fine." Olivia was beyond his shit, if he didn't want to see them then he didn't have to. "I'll just tell the girls that they won't be seeing daddy after all." She was about to slam down the receiver when he called out.

"Alright! Fine, I believe you. Don't hang up, I want to see them."

Sighing she brought the phone back to her ear, "Ok. Is today ok? Around 1 o'clock ... where we used to bring them?"

"That's fine, I'll be there."

"Yeah, sure." She hung up the phone and let out a frustrated sigh, rubbing the nape of her neck and working out the kinks and sore muscles. Glancing behind her she looked at the time, it was 10:21, she had roughly two and a half hours to get the girls ready to say goodbye to their father ... one last time.

XXXX

12:23 p.m.

She pulled in front of his apartment building and turned around in her seat, checking on the girls. Becca was sleeping and Cassie was busy reading one of her schoolbooks. Sighing to herself she pulled out her cell phone and dialed his number, he answered on the third beep.

"This is Elliot."

"Hey," she greeted. "We're outside your apartment."

"What?" he asked with a laugh, "You couldn't walk up?"

"For your information, no. Becca is sleeping, I didn't want to wake her."

"Right, I'm on my way down then." He hung up the phone and a few minutes later the passengers' side door opened and he climbed into her Toyota. He leaned over to kiss her but movement in the backseat caught his eye and instead he only gave her a peck on the cheek, then turned around and smiled at Cassie. "Hey kiddo, what'cha doing?"

"Reading," she replied without looking up at him. Elliot smiled and turned back around, looking at Olivia.

"So..." he asked, "He agreed to coming?"

She snorted, but didn't take her eyes off of the road. "Accused me of trying to set him up at first, but yeah, he agreed to come. Bastard tried to make me look like the bad one in all of this," she shook her head in disbelief. "I don't understand how I ever loved that man." It was more of a statement than a direct comment, so there was no reply.

They continued the drive in silence; the park was a good ten minutes away from Elliot's apartment and by the time they arrived Cassie was sleeping as well. Elliot was hesitant to carry her out to find Chris, but Olivia assured him that it would be fine, if Chris had a problem with it he would have to get use to it, because Elliot wasn't going anywhere, he was. The eight-year-old grumbled incoherently when he pulled her out of her seat, wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her head on one of his shoulders, blinking sleepily before closing her eyes and falling back asleep. They still had nearly half an hour before one; it was likely that Chris hadn't even arrived yet.

Olivia picked Becca up and the two-year-olds reaction was very similar to that of her sisters. They carried the two girls to a bench by the swings and sat down, allowing them to sleep for a few extra minutes. At fifteen minutes until one Chris came strolling up to the bench, giving Elliot an evil look. Elliot ignored the glare and gently shook Cassie, to wake her. Her eyes blinked open and she smiled sleepily at him. "Morning," she said with a yawn, wiggling out of his arms and sitting sideways on his lap.

"Afternoon," he corrected with a smile.

Olivia did the same with Becca, the younger girl tried to ignore her mother and continue sleeping, but when Olivia informed her that her father was there her eyes shot open and she looked around. She didn't say anything when she saw him, instead wrapped her arms tightly around her mothers neck, as if to protect herself.

"Honey?" Olivia asked, pulling back to look at her. "What's wrong?"

Cassie slid off of Elliot's lap and walked up to her father, staring up at him. "You hurt mommy," she told him plain as day.

He nodded, "Yeah, honey ... I did. I'm real sorry about it though." He crouched down in front of her so that they were eye level, "How about giving your daddy a hug?"

Cassie looked at him hesitantly for a moment, then glanced over her shoulder at her mother. Upon receiving a nod of approval she stepped forward and gave him a weak hug. When she pulled away her eyes darted around the area, until they fell on Elliot. She looked at her father before stepping back and out of his reach. "You and mommy broke up."

"We did," he said with another nod. "We just didn't love each other anymore, honey. That happens sometimes."

"Momma luv Ellie," Becca pointed out from her position on her mother's lap.

Chris looked at Olivia, then at Elliot, then back at Olivia. "Good for her," he said. "She deserves somebody better than I was."

Olivia turned away from Chris to look at Elliot, he smiled at her and she returned the smile. Becca's arms loosened from her neck and she slid out of her lap, climbing into Elliot's. She looked at her father and smiled, "We ok, daddy."

Chris stood up; "I can see that, Rebecca. I'm glad that you are." He ruffled Cassie's hair and looked at Olivia, "I'm leaving in a couple of days, I won't be coming back."

Cassie looked up at him, "Why?"

"Because, sweetie, I got a new job, and it's going to be easier for you guys with me out of the picture. You'll understand when you're older, I promise." He bent down again and hugged her, "I sure am going to miss you though."

"Will you call?"

"Of course I will," he looked over at Becca who was still settled into Elliot's lap. "I'll understand if you hate me, Becca. I'd hate myself, too."

Becca slid out of Elliot's lap and walked over to her father, "Bye, daddy." She said, hugging him. "I no hate you."

Chris laughed and hugged her tightly, "That's good to hear."

He set her back down and she clung tightly to her sister, smiling up at her father. Chris waved goodbye to them and walked over, glancing over his shoulder as he did so. Then, a few seconds later, he was gone.

"You two can go play," Olivia told the girls. "I'll call you when we leave."

They both nodded and ran off, the conversation with their father pushed into the back of their minds. Olivia, however, couldn't get over how surprisingly easy it had been. She looked over at Elliot and let out a sigh of relief, "Well ... that went well."

XXXX Authors Note contains Spoilers for Doubt!!!

A/N: Sorry it took so long to get out, It's been a real hectic week. Anyway, for those of you who watched tonight's episode (11/23/04) ... what did you think? I seriously couldn't decide if I thought he was guilty or innocent, but I'm leaning more towards guilty so I'm about to go vote that thought. But ... aside from that confusing story line ... they're separated! I seriously am shell-shocked, I never thought Dick Wolf would do something like that, but it does make sense. Now, I'm not one of those who's going 'heck yeah, now Olivia and Elliot can get together on the show' because I really don't think that's going to happen anytime soon, if ever. I really feel sorry for Elliot; he looked like he was about to cry. That stupid woman, what an idiot. Ah! I hope I didn't ruin anything for those who haven't seen it or anything. It just caught me off guard, but so did the entire episode. That was one of the most confusing (and one of the best) episodes I've ever seen. Just wanted to say something about it. Anyway, please reveiw!


	18. Chapter Eighteen

Fall to Pieces

Chapter Eighteen

Disclaimer: They don't belong to me.

XXXX

A week and a half after Chris moved to Pennsylvania a manila folder arrived with her mail, containing three documents. The first was signed divorce papers, the second his parental rights signed over, and the third was a bank statement informing her of the trust funds that had been opened in her daughters names. All the money that Chris had been saving for the girls over the years had been put away until either they went off to college or their 21st birthday, from what the letter said he would continue to deposit money regularly. Along with child support, her income, and now the trust fund Olivia wouldn't have to worry about the girl's education.

He called a few times, she let him talk with the girls briefly, but at the end of that week and a half they came to a mutual agreement that until they were both old enough to understand what had gone on between their parents the phone calls would be kept to a minimum. Olivia didn't want them wondering why they never got to see their father anymore, even though he was just a phone call away, they were still so young. They didn't understand that he really was gone.

Things at work got easier when the divorce was final. No longer did she receive sympathy looks from other female officers while walking through the precinct. Though, as with everything, there was a downfall. Now when she passed the single (and even a few of the married) officers they weren't as subtle when it came to sizing her up, it was taking a lot of her energy to keep from breaking every single one of their noses. Once, when she had been walking with Elliot, a passing uniform, Kingsley was his name, whistled at her. The look on the poor guy's face when Elliot backed him against the nearest wall was priceless, his eyes grew large and his face turned ashen.

"Sorry man," he apologized when Elliot had finished chewing him out. "I didn't realize she was taken so quickly."

Olivia was about to interject with a statement about how she was not 'taken' by anybody because she was not property on e-bay, there was no auction on her, when Elliot threw his own argument back at the younger man.

"Well now you do," he growled. "Leave her alone," he warned, "let your friends know, too."

"Yes sir," Kingsley whimpered before running off. When Elliot turned back to Olivia her arms were folded across her chest and anger was dancing in her eyes, how dare he?

"Elliot Stabler," she growled much like he had done only seconds before. "I don't know how in the world you would think that could possibly help any, to tell you the truth I don't want to know. But I can solve my own problems, thank you, I don't need your help on everything." Taking a threatening step towards him she continued, "Furthermore, instead of helping me out you just screwed things even worse than they already were. You know what's going to happen when what you just said gets to Cragen? He'll separate us; no doubt one of us will be working with Fin and the other with Munch. Do you want that?" She didn't wait for an answer, "I don't. And how dare you decide that I needed your protecting? I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself, if you ever thought otherwise. I don't need Super Stabler running to my rescue every time a man makes a pass at me. I learned how to deal with it long before I met you."

During the whole berating Elliot stayed quiet, a grin stuck on his face.

"What the hell do you think you're smiling about?" She asked, "I'm pissed at you."

"I can see that," he replied with a chuckle. "You're just really sexy when you're angry."

"Ugh!" Frustrated and highly peeved Olivia walked off, prepared for damage control. Thanks to Elliot's male superego she had a lot of mess to clean up. "Men," she grumbled to herself, pushing through a mass of uniforms, "are idiots."

XXXX

He had been trying to help, really he had, and no matter how idiotic the way had been his efforts were genuine. All he had wanted was for her to have some peace while she walked down the hallway, instead of being hit on every five seconds. They worked in an SVU, for crying out loud, you would think that the men on such a unit would have more respect for women, more couth and more maturity. But no, the second a pretty lady walks by they revert back to their natural dog-like form, tongues hanging out of their mouths, tails wagging. Had he ever been like that? -- He hoped not.

The 'sexy when you're angry' joke had only been his method of cooling things down, obviously she hadn't gotten the hint and thought that he was just being an ass like the rest of them. Truthfully, he had always thought that she looked great when she was pissed, though he had never voiced those opinions before because of the fact she was already married, and that he knew she could kick his ass if she wanted to. But, when he had said that he wasn't trying to make her mad, he just wanted her to smile. Looked like that plan had backfired, in a very, very bad way.

"Stabler you screw up," he muttered to himself as he ran off after her, in hopes of calming her down before she went off on some innocent bystander. Spotting her pushing her way through a throng of uniformed cops he sped up, catching her by the arm. She turned around with an icy glare, defenses on high. When she saw that it was him her look did not soften any, which worried him.

"'Liv," he began, using his pet name for her on purpose. "I was just joking with you. Come on, don't be mad."

"Oh, I'm not mad," she hissed, a smile that told him to back off spreading across her face. "I'm way pass mad." Pulling her arm out of his grasp she turned and began to walk away, he followed after inconspicuously, making sure he was a good ten feet behind. He didn't fool her and he knew it, but for now he was going to keep his distance. She was not a happy camper.

When she slumped down at her desk and began to rummage through the stacks of paperwork he eased into his own chair, across from hers, and sat back; his eyes fixed on her. It didn't take her long to realize that he was watching her but she didn't let on that she knew, instead she kept on with her work, writing furiously and grumbling incoherently to herself. After doing so for a good ten minutes she had enough, threw down her pen, and stared back at him.

"What?" She demanded, her voice sharp and irritated.

"This can't be the only thing bothering you," he said, "what's wrong?"

"I'm 'taken'?" She spit out, "What the hell?!" She sat back in her chair and folded her arms across her chest; "I'm not a piece of property in your possession. If you have forgotten I'm not just your girlfriend, you'll be lucky if I'm even that now, I'm also your partner, your friend, a mother, and fully capable of kicking your ass. So the next time you think about 'defending' me, make sure that while doing so you don't do something stupid." Pausing, she waited for his reply, her usually soft, brown eyes harsh and directed at him.

"I really thought it would help," he confessed. "It was a stupid thing to do, I know that now." Sighing, he shrugged. "I should probably start to think before I speak."

"Ya think?" She asked, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "Elliot, I'm not just mad at your for what you said and how you said it, but I'm mad that you didn't even give me the opportunity to defend myself. Had you given me said chance you would have seen that my way might have been a little more effective."

"What did you plan on saying?"

"Fuck off," she shrugged, "something along those lines. I wouldn't have threatened the guy and told him about our inter-office relations, but I would have let him know he needed to back off."

"And you think that would have worked?" He asked her, his right eyebrow climbing up his forehead.

"Yes I think it would have, it seemed to work every other time I did so."

"Wait - How many other times have you had to do so?" His eyes darted around the room, sizing up the other officers and looking for potential victims. "Who else has made a pass at you?"

"Why, so you can threaten them, too?" She asked, disbelief palpable in her voice. "I can't believe how you're acting, Elliot. Did you not hear me when I told you that I don't need your protection, I'm a big girl, I can watch out for myself when it comes to this sort of thing?"

"I heard you," he assured her, "that doesn't mean I'm not going to warn them away."

"Why do I even bother?" She asked herself, shaking her head. Still mumbling she added, "It's no use," and then went back to her paperwork. Successfully ignoring him for nearly the rest of the workday.

XXXX

There were only fifteen minutes left on the clock when Cragen came out of his office and beckoned. "Stabler," his voice billowed over the bullpen, "Benson, my office - Now."

Olivia shot Elliot an evil look before getting up from their chairs and making their way to his office. Olivia made sure to stay at least five paces ahead of Elliot, hoping that what the captain had to talk about did not involve Elliot's previous stunt. Her efforts were in vain, she knew, what else would there be to talk about with only fifteen minutes left to go? Unless it was a particularly bad case that needed their immediate attention. She was thankful that she didn't even consider wishing for the latter rather than the former.

"Sit down," he instructed them, an annoyed look on his face. "We need to talk."

"Sir," she began immediately. "I can expl--"

"Sit, detective," he boomed. Olivia obeyed and in a rush sat down, glancing over at Elliot as she did so.

"I am not happy with you two," he informed them. "You have a lot to own up for, and I suggest that you be completely honest with me."

"Yes sir," they both replied simultaneously.

"Good," Cragen sighed. "I got a rather ... interesting visit from a uniformed police officer earlier today, and I contemplated whether I should even question you on the content of our conversation." He paused, taking his own seat. "This particular officer informed me that, after passing by you and Olivia in the hallway," he looked at Elliot, "you backed him up against a wall and threatened him should he ever hit on her. According to this uniform, you informed him that Olivia was taken - By you."

"Cap, I never said that," Elliot defended. "The guy made a pass at her, I got a little carried away. I told him that she was taken, but never once did I say it was by me."

He looked over at Olivia, "Do you back him on that statement."

"As much as I wish he hadn't," she told Cragen with a grimace, "he said exactly that."

"Now, I'm going to ask you something and I want the complete truth. Got it?"

They both nodded.

"Alright." Cragen paused again, then continued on. "Are you two dating each other?"

"Well I wouldn't really...." Olivia began.

Elliot went next, "We're not exactly-"

"You see," Olivia added. "The truth is - Yeah ... we are."

"I see," Cragen mused, a frown settling on his face. "Well, you do understand that I'm going to have to do something about this."

"Yes sir," Elliot replied solemnly. "We do."

"Right then ... Elliot ... Olivia..."

XXXX

A/N: Alright, that's all you get right now. You'll figure out what he does in the next chapter. Anyone want to take a guess? Review! 


	19. Chapter Nineteen

**Fall to Pieces**

**Chapter Nineteen**

**Disclaimer: Ugh, they don't belong to me.**

**A/N: Oh! I am so mad at myself right now. I had half of this chapter written. It was really good, too! Then I had to go and do something completely stupid! I clicked out of Microsoft Word and didn't save what I had; I didn't even realize what I was doing! Grr, I'm so mad right now. I can't remember everything that I wrote down! This sucks. I guess there's a reason you're supposed to save your work like every five minutes, huh?  
I am such a ditz. Grr!  
XXXX**

_"Alright." Cragen paused again, then continued on. "Are you two dating each other?"_

_"Well I wouldn't really...." Olivia began._

_Elliot went next, "We're not exactly-"_

_"You see," Olivia added. "The truth is - Yeah ... we are."_

_"I see," Cragen mused, a frown settling on his face. "Well, you do understand that I'm going to have to do something about this."_

_"Yes sir," Elliot replied solemnly. "We do."_

_"Right then ... Elliot ... Olivia..."_

XXXX

Cragen trailed off, glancing between Elliot and Olivia, the look on his face unreadable. He was silent for a little under a minute, then as he leaned back in his chair he continued, "You both understand that a relationship between partners is highly frowned upon, right?"

They both nodded.

"And that I could either separate you two and give you each new partners or send one of you to another precinct?"

They looked at each other and nodded again.

"Then, you should also know that I'm not going to send one of my best detectives to another precinct just because they have fallen in love, or whatever it is between you two. However, I do have to do something about it, even if I'd rather not. If it was possible, I wouldn't be doing anything about this, it's apparent to me that you two work perfectly fine together, no matter what your out-of-work relationship may be. And if the big wigs could have their way they would send one of you to another precinct, maybe even to another squad. So, since I have to do something, I'm going to have to split you two up. Elliot will be working with Munch, and Olivia, you'll be partnered with Fin."

Olivia felt her stomach turn, they were being separated. She didn't want to work with Fin, Elliot was her partner, they were great together. Looking over at Elliot she saw the same look in his eyes, he-of course- didn't want this anymore than she did. Turning back to Cragen she sighed, "We understand, Captain. It has to be done."

The corners of his mouth twitched in his attempt to stifle a smile, a harbinger of things to come. Somehow, Elliot and Olivia both missed the sign. "Of course, it is still my decision who works what case. And it is common knowledge that you two, Fin and Munch, are my best detectives, but that you tend to work better when partnered together. So ... it wouldn't be that hard to believe if I occasionally partnered you two together, or maybe more than occasionally."

"Do you mean-" Elliot started to ask before Cragen cut him off and continued with his explanation.

"I've already explained this to Munch and Fin, they're fine with the idea. This is, of course, just a precautionary method, in case somebody gets suspicious and wants to check things out and make sure this is legit. While I will keep you two together for most cases every now and then I will have to assign you a case with your actual partner, so it's not so obvious. Now, you two are OK with this, right?"

"Better than ok, Cap." Olivia replied. "Thank you."

"My pleasure," Cragen replied.

Glancing at her clock Olivia sighed, "As much as I'm enjoying this conversation, sir, I've really got to pick up the girls. There's only about fifteen minutes left for me to get to Heather's, and she can't watch them late tonight. Her and her husband are going out for their anniversary dinner," she explained. "I need to head out."

"Of course," he replied. "You're shift is up, you're free to go whenever you want to."

She nodded and stood up from her chair and made her way out of the room. After she had opened the door she turned back around and looked at him, "When does the partner switch become official?"

"It's going to take a few days," he told her, "probably not until sometime next week."

She glanced at Elliot, then back to Cragen. "Right ... well, I'll see you tomorrow."

Elliot watched as she left and then turned back to look at Cragen, "I don't know how to thank you for this, sir."

"You don't have to," Cragen said. "The way I see it I didn't have any other option than this, at least none that I would consider. If you really want to thank me then don't screw this thing with Olivia up."

"I'm trying," he confessed. "I already did something really stupid, though. She's pissed at me for it."

"Threatening the uniform," Cragen supplied. "That was idiotic, you know?"

"Yeah, it's just been a long time since I've been in a serious relationship. Even longer since I've been in a relationship where I've gotten this jealous ... it's going to take some getting used to."

"Some advice, Elliot, the jealousy never goes away."

"I was afraid you'd say that," he told him with a sigh.

**XXXX**

Olivia managed to make it to Heather's apartment before 6 o'clock, without speeding. She took on the stairs two by two, her mind still buzzing from the conversation she had just had. Although she understood why the captain had to separate the two of them, she wasn't too thrilled with it. But, she mused, what the captain had come up with was much better than either her or Elliot being sent an entirely different precinct.

As she knocked on the door she thought about her earlier argument with Elliot over his treat to the uniformed police officer. It still got to her that he had the audacity to say that she was _taken_. She calmed herself down as Heather opened the door, clad in a robe and hair curlers.

"I just started getting ready," Heather explained, after receiving a look from Olivia. "Come on in, the girls are getting their things ready."

Olivia nodded and followed her into the apartment, "So ... ten years, huh? Congratulations."

"Thanks," she replied with a smile. "It makes me feel old, though."

"I'm older than you are," Olivia told her.

"Yeah, I know." Heather said. "You must feel really old."

Olivia groaned, "Don't remind me."

"Sorry," she replied. "You and Chris were married for what ... eight, eight in a half years?"

"Almost eight in a half," Olivia told her. "I couldn't imagine ten! You've got a lot more patience than I do, I guess."

"Oh, it's just if you find the right guy or not. So maybe you made a mistake, I think you've made up for it though." A smile spread across her face, "Before you know it you'll be celebrating your ten year anniversary, then you'll actually be old."

"Heather, Elliot and I just started dating. Don't you think that it's a little too soon to be thinking about our ten year anniversary!"

"No," she said nonchalant. "I've seen the way you two are together, I can already tell you that this one's going to last. Chris ... well, we won't get into that one. He gave you two beautiful girls, who knows, maybe Elliot will give you some boys."

Olivia rolled her eyes; "At the rate he's going the only thing he'll be giving me is a headache."

"Oh no, trouble in paradise already?"

"Funny, huh?" she asked.

"Well," Heather sighed, "what happened, exactly?"

"It's stupid really," Olivia explained. "It's so different with Elliot than it was with Chris, Elliot can get so jealous. Like today, we were walking in the precinct and a young uniformed cop whistled at me. Elliot nearly lost his head, he actually told the guy that I was taken-"

"Taken?" Heather inquired, her eyebrows climbing up her forehead.

"Let's not even get into that," she told her. "The thing is, if I had been with Chris when that happened he would have looked at me like I gave that uniform some reason to whistle at me. It surprised me ... I guess I'm going to have to get used to the idea that he's a jealous person."

"Oh, honey, I can tell you right now that you'll never get used to it. It'll piss you off until the day you die. It still gets on my nerves when Brad gets green, and I've been married to him for ten years, not to mention the two we dated before he proposed! There's nothing that you can do about it, when he stops getting jealous is when you have to worry."

She smiled, "Well ... I shouldn't be keeping you from getting ready for your dinner. I'll get the girls and we'll go- you're sure you don't need anybody to watch Mia and Robbie?"

"My mom's going to drop by in about an hour and watch them, thanks anyway."

"Alright, let me know if anything changes." She got off of the couch she had been sitting on and made her way to Mia's room, where the girls were. After knocking on the door and receiving confirmation to 'come in!' she entered. "Girls, you ready to go home?"

Becca nodded and climbed off of Mia's bed, running up to Olivia and throwing out her arms to be picked up. Olivia obeyed, taking her in her arms and lifting her up. "You're getting to big for this, Bec," she groaned. "Or maybe I am getting old."

"Momma's old!" Becca squealed, tugging at her hair.

"Yeah, yeah. So I've been told." She looked over at Cassie, "You ready, hon?"

"Yeah," Cassie replied, shutting her book and sliding off of the bed. "Are we going to get dinner?"

"Sure, why not?"

"Booger King!" Becca suggested, looking back at her sister for agreement.

"Fine," Olivia sighed. "Burger King it is."

**XXXX**

Four hours later, after both girls were asleep in the room, Olivia stretched out on her couch and allowed her eyes to drift closed. Half awake and half-asleep she tried to ignore the knocking at her apartment door, but the longer she ignored it the louder the knocks got. Whoever it was wasn't going to give up or be fooled that easily.

Willing herself off of the couch she slid across the living room floor and made her way to the front door. "I'm coming," she called out as another loud knock left her wincing.

Opening the door a groan escaped her lips. "Didn't your mother tell you that patience is a virtue?" She asked, stepping aside and allowing him to enter the apartment.

He shrugged, "I'm sure she did."

"Why are you here, Elliot?"

Looking around the room he sighed, "I ... wanted to apologize."

"Oh?" She asked, "Go ahead."

"I was a jerk earlier," he explained. "I had no right to say what I said, I couldn't control myself." Taking a step towards her he continued, "I just get so damn jealous." Taking another step closer he pulled her into his arms, "Do you forgive me?"

"I guess...." she sighed. "You do look cute when you beg."

A smile spread across his face, "Oh ... really?"

"Really," she repeated. "Very cute ... sexy even. Although, I too prefer seeing you angry. As long as it's not directed towards me."

"And how long have you thought this way?" He asked, leaning closer to her.

"I don't know ... it's been awhile. Why do you think I always let you be the 'bad cop'? I don't do it to feed into your male superego, you know?"

"I'll keep that in mind," he told her just before capturing her lips with his own. "I love making up," he said when they broke apart. She grinned and leaned forward, kissing him passionately. Her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him deeper into the kiss. Breaking the kiss she was surprised by the intense look in his eyes.

"Elliot...." she whispered.

He shook his head and kissed her briefly, "I should go...." he told her, starting to pull away.

"Don't," she said, pulling him back. "It's ok ... you don't have to go."

The intensity in his eyes still burned, "Are you sure?"

Nodding she kissed him again, "I want you to stay."

"The girls-"

"Are heavy sleepers," she finished for him. Leaning closer she whispered into his ear, "I'll be quiet." Taking hold of his hands she pulled him with her down the hallway and stopped outside her bedroom door.

"Are you sure?" He repeated, "Because if you're not that's alri-" She silenced him with her lips. Reaching behind her back she twisted the doorknob and pushed it open, pulling him in the bedroom, pausing only to shut and lock the door behind her.

**XXXX**

She woke up the next morning wrapped in two strong, bare arms. Yawning she carefully turned to face the clock, it was only 5:21 am, she still had more than half an hour until the alarm would sound. Allowing her eyes to shut she snuggled closer to Elliot and his arms tightened around her instinctively. Smiling to herself she slowly drifted back to sleep.

**XXXX**

**A/N: That would have been out earlier today but like I said early, my ditzy self went and did something stupid. And I'm normally not that bad, I swear. My sister is much more ditzy than I am! Oh well, it turned out almost the same as it was before, anyway. Now, though, I have a huge test tomorrow that I should have been studying for all day ... and it's now almost 10:00. Guess I won't get that much studying in, and I have the test first thing in the morning!  
Wish me luck, it's worth 20 of my grade!  
Review, too!**


	20. Chapter Twenty

**Fall to Pieces**

**Chapter Twenty**

**Disclaimer: Well ... let's see. Um ... ok, those don't belong to me ... neither do they ... oh! oh! Olivia's kids are my property ... but oh, those people aren't ... neither is the show. Um, yeah ... that's it I think. No ... wait, I forgot about Chris. He belongs to me, too.**

**A/N: Grr, I don't get those test results back until after Christmas break. Alright, I'm not sure about their ages, so ... oh well.  
XXXX**

Elliot sighed as he rolled out of bed that morning. But, after he looked at the alarm-clock he noticed that he only had about five minutes until it went off, and now was as good a time as any to get up. Maybe Olivia could sleep a few extra minutes because of it. He turned the alarm off and lazily made his way towards the conjoining bathroom, pausing to make sure that the bedroom door was still locked. The last thing he needed was a three year old girl walking in the room with him standing stark-naked in the middle of it.

After showering quickly and then changing back into the clothes he had worn the day before he gently shook Olivia awake. Sleepily blinking her eyes open she smiled at him and stretched her arms out. "Morning," she greeted with a yawn.

"Good morning," he returned. "It's just after six, you go on and take a shower and I'll make something for you and the girls to eat for breakfast."

Nodding she yawned again and then crawled out of the bed, pausing slightly to kiss him before running off to the bathroom. After checking around for signs of the girls Elliot made his way into the kitchen, it was 6:10. Figuring that the easiest thing to make would be scrambled eggs he searched around her fridge and found a carton, there were six eggs left. Not sure how the girls liked their eggs he kept them plain, they could add anything extra if they so chose to.

Around ten minutes later Olivia emerged from her bedroom, clad in a pair of jeans and a three-quarters black shirt that was very nice-fitting. He took a second to admire her, which didn't go unnoticed to Olivia who blushed slightly and inquired about what he had made for breakfast.

"Oh," he replied, "just some eggs. I wasn't sure how you and the girls liked yours, so I just made them scrambled and plain."

"They like scrambled, anyway," she told him, "Becca will want some pepper on hers, but Cassie will eat them plain."

"When do they need to be waken up?" he asked, pulling a jug of orange-juice from the fridge.

"Cassie has about ten more minutes and Becca only needs to be waken up in enough time to dress, brush her teeth and hair, and eat. So, she's got about twenty before we have to leave for Heather's."

Elliot nodded, "Alright. You want to eat now?"

"Sure, why not?" Brushing past him she made her way into the kitchen and fixed herself a plate and then a glass of juice. "What about you?" she asked, on her way to the dinning room. "You gonna eat something, or is your cooking that bad?"

"Ha-ha," he said sarcastically. "As a matter of fact, I was just about to make myself a plate. But, you know, age before beauty."

She glared at him, "I'm only two and a half weeks older than you, Stabler."

He shrugged and started on making himself a plate. Thirty minutes later, after the girls had gotten ready and eaten something they headed out the door. Within less than ten minutes they were at Heather's apartment and five minutes before 7 o'clock they pulled up in front of the station house. The day promised to be an interesting one.

**XXXX**

The first thing the two detectives noticed was that, as they walked into the 1-6, all eyes were on them. Rumors spread faster in the precinct than in the girl's bathroom of any American high school. So by then everybody knew of Elliot's threat to Kingsley the day before, and many knew of the conversation between Cragen and Stabler, though none knew the actual content of said conversation to the full extent. Some people would have staked their lives on the fact that Cragen threatened to fire both detectives and had forbid any thing further between the two. Other's would swear that the man had congratulated the two on finally figuring things out. Which, the latter was a bit closer to the truth than the former, but still extremely far from it.

Both were relieved to see that their things hadn't been changed around, the Captain hadn't been lying when he said it would take a few days for everything to be fully official. For now, they would still sit face-to-face, though not for long. As they sat down they could tell that both Fin and Munch were watching them, further investigation showed that both had smart-ass smiles on their faces.

"What?!" Olivia barked, glaring at both men.

"Hey, Elliot," Fin asked, ignoring her question. "Didn't you wear that thing yesterday, man?"

Scowling Olivia turned back to Elliot, her glare now fixed on him. He'd better not say anything, it told him. The consequences would not be desired.

"Nope," Elliot lied, not wanting to try Olivia's patience. The last place he wanted to be was in the dog-house, especially since he had been there only twenty-four hours prior. "Why, does it look like it?"

"Just a bit," Munch informed him. "...So, you two talked with Cragen?"

"You know we did Munch," Olivia said with a sigh.

"You're right," Munch replied. "I do."

"So ... how long–" Fin began to ask, but Olivia cut him off.

"Not long," her voice was annoyed. "Could we not talk about this right now? It can wait for lunch."

"Fine," Fin said, holding his hands up in his defense. "I'll shut-up, Partner."

She didn't even have to look at him to know he had an idiotic grin on his face. She looked at him with a scowl, "Technically, I'm still Elliot's partner."

"I meant at work," Fin replied, that goofy grin still growing.

Scowling seemed to be something she was doing a lot that day, "So did I."

"Oh!" he exclaimed with mock-surprise. "You see, I thought that you were talking about rela–"

"Well, I wasn't." She said sharply, cutting him off mid-sentence.

"Got'cha, Partner." Fin replied, a cuckle in his voice and his eyes dancing with laughter.

Another scowl appeared on her face as she turned away from Fin and started on the stack of paper-work that had accumulated in her 'in-box'. And it stayed there for virtually the whole day.

**XXXX**

"I could kill Fin," Olivia exclaimed as she climbed into the passengers' seat of Elliot's car. "He doesn't know when to shut-up."

"You think Fin was bad you should have heard Munch," Elliot replied with a sigh. "He asked if I fall in love with all my partners, and If I do could I ask Cragen to work with Fin."

Olivia smiled despite herself, "That's Munch for you."

"I guess," Elliot said, turning the key in the ignition. "To Heather's?"

She nodded, "To Heather's."

**XXXX**

"Are you going to stay tonight?" Olivia asked Elliot after she had finished putting the girls to bed.

"I'm not sure if I should," he told her.

"Oh," she replied, trying not to sound hurt. "Alright, then."

"Not because I don't want to," he explained hurriedly. "Fin and Munch are really going to suspect something if I wear the same thing to work three days in a row."

"Right ... I forgot."

"I could always get a change of clothes from my place and then come back."

She nodded, "OK."

Elliot kissed her briefly, "I'll be back soon."

**XXXX**

**A/N: Alright, I know it's not that long and ends at a kind of funny place. But, I didn't have much time to write since I've gotta go pack for a trip out of town this weekend. I just figured that since I had about an hour I could get something done. Anyway, let me know what'cha think about it.**


	21. Chapter Twenty One

**Fall to Pieces**

**Chapter Twenty One**

**Disclaimer: Alrighty then, the show and the characters on the show do not belong to me, but, Chris (who is no longer part of my story at the moment, as well as Mary), Rebecca, and Cassandra do belong to me. Moreover, the various criminals and victims are my property, also. So, there it is. What's their's and what's mine. Not much is mine, but, I'm content.**

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait in-between chapters. But, most of you know how Christmas time is! Hectic is one word which comes to mind. And, this is my first chapter of this story which is being typed on my laptop. :)**

**XXXX**

It only took him around fifteen minutes to get home, grab something to sleep in and something to wear the next day, and get back to her apartment. Instead of knocking, which could have waken the girls, he just used his key to enter. Olivia wasn't in the livingroom, nor was she in the kitchen. "Liv?" he called out as quietly as he could, "where are you?"

"My room," she replied just as quietly, "changing."

"Oh," it was said more to himself than to her. He set his bag down on the couch and then sat next to it, grabbing the remote and turning on the television. He flipped through the channels, but there wasn't anything really good on. Unless he wanted to watch a re-run of 'The X-files' on TNT, or 'Forensic Files' on CourtTV. Opting to watch neither he simply turned off the TV and rested his head against the back of the couch with a sigh. "Liv?" he called out again, "you still not dressed?"

"I am," she said, walking out of the bedroom. She was wearing a pair of jogging pants and an old, worn out, NYPD t-shirt, but she still managed to look incredibly gorgeous. Her cheeks flushed when she noticed how attentively he was watching her, and she made her way over to the couch to sit next to him. Or, more like lay her legs over his while she stretched out over the rest of the couch. Not that he minded, it was relaxing in a way.

"So?" she asked, "we're not going to be partners anymore."

He nodded with a sigh, they hadn't really talked about the change that would inevitably take place in only a few days. Neither of them had wanted to admit it, even though the captain had assured them it wouldn't mean the end of them working together. "We just won't have the title anymore, I doubt much will change."

"Yeah," she admitted, "but, we can't introduce each other as 'my partner' anymore." A frown spread across her face, "There's going to be a lot of gossip around the station house for the next couple of weeks, maybe even months. We'll probably be scrutinized."

"We'll deal with it," he told her, taking her hand into his own, squeezing it reassuringly. "Don't worry about them, they're just jealous."

"Maybe," she sighed. "Munch and Fin are never going to stop joking."

"They did even before," he reminded her. "They're just being themselves."

She smiled lightly, "I guess so."

He glanced over at the clock, "We should probably get some sleep."

"Yeah," she agreed, sitting up on the couch. "Probably." she grinned, "if that's what you want." She leaned over and kissed him passionately, slipping her hands under his shirt and up his chest. When they broke apart she was still grinning, "Still tired?"

"Olivia Benson, are you trying to seduce me?" he asked with a grin of his own.

"Only if it's working," she replied, the grin on her face stretching.

"Oh, it is." He kissed her briefly, then stood up from the couch, and since she had been practically sitting on his lap, he carried her with him. She laughed and brought her arms up around his neck, kissing him again. Just as the previous night, they paused only to lock th e bedroom door.

**XXXX**

She woke up early the next morning, still wrapped in his arms. Smiling to herself she turned to face him, even though she could tell by his short, even breaths he was still sleeping. He was covered from the waist down and his bare chest and arms were a welcomed sight, it had been awhile since she had waken in a man's arms. She hadn't realized how much she missed it.

Her movement had waken him, his eyes blinked open sleepily and he smiled. "Morning," his voice was husky and he coughed to get it to return to normal, "what time is it?"

"Four something," she said, placing light kisses along his jaw. "I didn't mean to wake you."

His arms wrapped tighter around her, "I'm not complaining."

A grin stretched across her face, "I didn't think you would." She kissed him again, "We've still got over an hour...."

"I know," he replied, returning the kiss. "I'm not tired anymore."

"Me either," she grinned as he changed positions, hoovering over her.

Another kiss.

"Elliot Stabler," she said with an amused smile, "are you trying to seduce me?"

He grinned, "Only if it's working."

**XXXX**

Olivia had been right in assuming that the gossip would stick around for awhile. A week after Cragen called them into his office the two were split up, Olivia began to be associated as Fin's partner, and Elliot was reassigned to Munch. That only fulled the gossip, if they had to be separated then something had to be going on. Something well worth hours of gossip.

That very day Cragen called Fin and Olivia into his office, they were being sent on a case. He admitted that them going together was only to prove that he the partner swap had be authentic. If he had done all the paperwork and then sent Olivia and Elliot on a case when it finally went through that would just point out to the higher-up's that this was a sham, and that wasn't exactly a good thing. Therefore, they went off on their first official case as partners, and for the next few weeks they would continue to work together. That way nobody was suspicious.

She made eye-contact with Elliot as they left the station, both frowned at the same time and she gave him a look, he understood that it meant for him to call. She would fill him in on what Cragen had told her. He probably wouldn't be any happier with it than she was, but she knew it was necessary, and so would he. A few weeks wasn't that long to wait, and both of them had worked long cases with other detectives. None had ever been three weeks long, but some had come close.

Elliot had stayed over at her apartment nearly every night that last week where they were still partners. Olivia was surprised that Cassie hadn't asked why Elliot had been over in the mornings, her young, inquiring mind always seemed to notice things like that. Then again, Cassie really liked Elliot, so maybe she was just content in spending more time with him, and Elliot had made breakfast every time he stayed over, so that was a plus for the girls- not to mention Olivia.

Chris continued to call every other day to talk with the girls. Olivia didn't mind at all, she was glad that he was making an effort to still be in their lives, even if he had moved away. He never stayed on long, though. He worked in the ER at his new hospital, so he was forever being beeped with an emergency, something Olivia knew about all to well- she didn't blame him for that.

Two and a half weeks after Olivia's first case with Fin the Captain assigned her to a case with Elliot, no explanations as to why, it was just a spur-of-the-moment decision- at least that would be what he said if anybody asked him why they weren't working with their partners. It was something he occasionally did, he'd done it before, so nobody would really have any reason to wonder.

It was a very disturbing case. A nine year old girl, blonde hair and bright blue eyes was the vic. Her mother, who could only be described as a crack-whore (and that was putting it nicely), had a nasty problem of inviting men over and then getting so drunk that she passed out. Now, where many men would either give up on her, or have their fun while she was still asleep, one particularly sick guy found his way into Amber's room and figured if he couldn't have the mother the daughter (who was only 8 at the time) was the next best thing.

Amber was small for her age, the mother didn't exactly worry about feeding her, so she couldn't even attempt to fight the man off. And when she screamed for help nobody heard, or either they did and didn't care. Her mother didn't exactly live in the nicest part of town.

This man, this sick excuse for a human being, bragged to his "friends" about his easy lay. It got a few of their heads spinning, and some made it a point to go out with the woman only to get her drunk to the point of passing out, then ventured into the little girls room. It went on for months before Amber's mother found out, but Trisha didn't exactly do what any half-caring mother would have. Instead of fighting the man off of her daughter she demanded that he pay her 200$ for stealing her daughters' innocence.

The last man had bragged to the wrong person. A younger man, early twenties, who hadn't made the best choices in his life. He brushed it off for awhile, but as soon as he got clean he knew he had to do something. Trisha was still living in the same hell-hole of an apartment that she had when the man bragged to him, so they didn't have trouble finding them.

It didn't take an expert to see that the mother was high when the two detectives came to talk to her. Her face was sunken in and it looked like she hadn't slept in days. "Ms. Thomson?" Olivia asked, showing the woman her badge. "My name is Olivia Benson, I'm a detective. This is Elliot Stabler, my par- he's also a detective. Can we talk to you?"

She studied them suspiciously, "About what?"

_About how you're using your child as a prostitute. _Olivia thought, angrily. "We just need to ask you a few questions, Ms. Thomson."

Trisha Thomson frowned at Olivia, then shifted her gaze and studied Elliot appreciatively, then looked back to Olivia and smiled. Olivia scowled in response and as stealthily as she could she scooted closer to him, it was instinctive. This woman was trash, and Olivia didn't really like the look that she gave him. After glancing between the two once more she finally nodded in frustration.

"Alright, come in." she stood out of the doorway and let them pass. The smell of marijuana and dirtiness greeted them and Elliot noticed Olivia's face twist with disgust.

"Ms. Thomson, where is your daughter?" Olivia asked, glancing around the living room.

"Her bedroom," Trisha replied cooly. "Where she normally is."

"Could I talk to her?" she asked, although leaving Elliot alone with Trisha wasn't something she wanted to do. Not because she was worried about what he would do, but because she was worried about what Trisha would. "If you don't mind."

"I don't see why you would want to," Trisha grumbled. "But, go ahead." She pointed down the hallway, "First door on your left."

Olivia nodded, "Thank you."

Trisha grunted in response. "Whatever."

She headed down the hallway, and knocked gently on the door that had Amber's name written on it. _Makes it easier for the drunks to find their way around,_ Olivia thought with disgust.

"Come in," the voice was meek and tired. Olivia reached for the knob, but it was missing, only the empty hole where it had once been remained. Olivia cringed, Amber must have locked the door one night so either the man broke the door handle, or Trisha took it away. Gently pushing the door open Olivia glanced around the room, it was immaculate. Nothing like the rest of the apartment, which probably hadn't been vacuumed in months, and clothes cluttered the floors. Amber's room, however, was painted bright white and there were blue and pink flowers plastered against the walls. It looked like a normal 9 year olds bedroom, too bad the little girl who lived in it was far from normal.

"Amber?" she asked, the little girl nodded. "Hi, my name is Olivia."

"Hi," she replied shyly.

"Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?"

She nodded.

Olivia took a deep breath, "Ok, then." Stepping into the room she looked around and found a chair, "Can I sit here?"

Another nod.

"I'm a police officer," she told her, taking out her badge and handing it to her. "So, it's ok to tell me things, right?"

"I guess," Amber replied, tracing the edges of her badge. "What kind of police officer are you?"

"I'm a detective," Olivia answered. "I investigate crimes."

"Oh."

"So, Amber.... You're 9 so that means you're in what- 4th grade?"

Yet another nod.

"So, what's your favorite subject in school?"

"English," the little girl replied almost immediately. "What was yours?"

Olivia smiled, "I was always more interested in science."

Amber wrinkled her nose, "Science?"

"Yeah," she said with a laugh, "I was a science geek."

"You don't look like a geek to me," Amber assured her with a smile that surprised Olivia.

"Well, thank you." Olivia sighed to herself, the conversation would soon turn serious. "Amber, if I ask you something do you promise to tell me the truth?"

Amber nodded, not sure why Olivia needed to ask for her to tell the truth.

"Good.... When your mommy brings men home, does she fall asleep some times?"

A look of horror passed through her eyes, and the smile that had so surprised Olivia disappeared automatically. Amber didn't answer.

"All you have to say is 'yes' or 'no'. You could even nod or shake your head."

A nod.

"Good, that's good. Now, can I ask another question?" Another nod. "Alright, when mommy passes out, do some of the men come into your room?"

Olivia could see the lump in her throat. The little girl nodded, her eyes beginning to fill with tears.

"Do any of them ... touch you?"

"Yes," a simple, yet so complex word. Her voice was thick and strained, and the tears could be heard.

"Do they hurt you?"

She nodded, "Yeah."

"You're doing great, honey." There was a knock at the door, Olivia turned to see Elliot poke his head into the room. She turned back to Amber, "Honey, this is Elliot, we work together."

"Is he a police officer, too?" she wanted to know.

"Yeah, hon. He is." Olivia assured her. "I need to talk to him real quick, is that alright?"

She nodded and wiped a tear off of her cheek. Olivia got up from her chair and walked over to the door, "She confirms the tip, Elliot. We need to get her out of here, now."

He nodded, "I"ll call Cragen. Do we have enough to bring the mother in?"

"All she's said is some of the men come into her room and hurt her when her mother passes out, so not yet." She sighed in frustration, "It would probably be best to keep somebody watching her though, tell Cragen that."

"Alright," he left the room and Olivia walked over to the bed were Amber was sitting.

"Is it ok if you come with me to where I work?"

"What does mommy say?" she asked, looking truly concerned that her mother might not like that idea.

"It doesn't matter, honey." Olivia said, picking the girl up from the bed. It was scary how light she was, Olivia could barely tell the difference between Amber's weight and Becca's, and there was a 6 year difference between the two. "You know," Olivia said, "I have a daughter around your age."

"Really?" Amber asked as Olivia walked out of her bedroom. Elliot was talking to Trisha, who didn't seem upset that her daughter was being taken away.

"Yep," she replied, "her name is Cassandra. She's eight. I have another daughter, too. Her name is Becca, she's only three, though."

"Can I meet them?" she asked, that beautiful smile somehow returning to her face.

Olivia was silent for a moment. She had never even thought of having Becca and Cassie meet some of the victims she worked with, she had never admitted to any of them that she had children. "Sure," she told Amber, afraid of how it would make the little girl feel if she said no. "Maybe sometime during the weekend, when they're not in school."

"It's after four, where are they now?"

"At a friends house," she answered, the sedan coming into view. After she got her buckled in the back seat Elliot came out, cell phone to his ear.

"Yeah, we're bringing her to the station now. ... We didn't have enough evidence on the mother to arrest her, but you should send somebody to tail her, just in case she tries to tip anybody off. ... Alright, Cap, we'll be back in a few." He hung up the phone and sighed in frustration. "I don't like this case one bit."

"We never do," she replied with a sigh of her own.

**XXXX**

**A/N: Again, sorry for the long delay. Hopefully the next one won't take so long to come out!**

**Let me know what'cha think about it.**


	22. Chapter Twenty Two

**Fall to Pieces**

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

**Disclaimer: The show and the main characters do not belong to me. Cassie and Becca, as well as the other characters with small parts, do. You can't have them- they're all I've got.**

**XXXX**

_2 Months Later:_

"Momma!" Cassie called out, knocking on Olivia's bedroom door. "Telephone!"

Olivia glanced over at the alarm clock and scowled, it was only half after seven and it was a weekend... she should be sleeping still. As she slid out from under the warm covers of her bed she vaguely wondered why her daughter was up so early and why Elliot wasn't still asleep in her bed. Rubbing the sleep out of her eyes she padded across the hard-wood floor and opened the door to her bedroom. "Who is it?"

Cassie shrugged and handed her the phone, "It's a guy."

"Well, that narrows things down about halfway," Olivia said with a grin, taking the phone from her eldest daughter's hand. "Benson," she greeted the unknown male at the other end.

"Morning, partner." It was Fin.

A groan escaped her lips, she knew what was coming next. "Where and when?"

"Just meet me at the station in ten minutes... I'm on my way there know."

"Alright, I'm on my way."

"Listen, Liv. I'm really sorry about this... I know you've not had a weekend off in a while." his voice was genuine and she smiled because of it.

"You're not the problem here, Fin." she assured him. "Too many perverts are.... I'll see you in a bit."

He said goodbye and hung up the phone and Olivia went back into her room and threw some clothes on, grabbing her gun and badge from the night stand. When she entered the living room she saw Elliot lying on the couch, Becca cuddled up next to him asleep. Further examination showed that Elliot, too, was asleep... peacefully so. Putting two and two together Olivia figured Becca had woken up early from one of the nightmares she had been having recently and made her way into Olivia's bedroom. And, rather than waking her up Elliot took Becca into the living room, turned on the TV (which was still going, but on mute), and laid with the little girl until she fell asleep... then fell asleep as well.

Cassie walked into the living room and frowned at her mother, "Are you leaving?"

Olivia nodded, "Yeah. I've got to go to work. When Elliot wakes up tell him where I went and have him call me, OK?"

"Alright." Cassie stood on her tip-toes and kissed her mother on the cheek. "Bye."

"Bye, sweetheart." she ruffled the girls hair before heading out the door, glancing behind her briefly to sneak one last peek of Elliot and her daughter asleep on the living room sofa.

**XXXX**

When he woke up an hour after that Cassandra was sitting on the floor with her back resting against the couch, watching with a curious attentiveness, one glance at the TV explained everything- she was watching Spongebob. In the previous months he had come to understand that when Cassie was watching Spongebob she was dead to the world, or at least to those in her immediate vicinity. A small, warm body pressed against his chest confused him for a split-second, until he remembered why he had been sleeping on the couch in the first place.

For the previous few nights Becca had been having mild nightmares. Not enough to wake her in a cold-sweat or screaming bloody-murder, but enough to where she had trouble falling back asleep. All the other nights the little girl had woken her mother and Olivia had willingly climbed out of the bed and taken her daughter into the living room, laid down on the couch with her, covered up in blankets and turned on the TV. It never took long for the soft sounds coming from the television to lure the girl back to sleep, when Olivia was sure that Becca was once again asleep she allowed herself to drift back off. The night before, however, Becca had woken Elliot up. He was fairly certain the girl had not meant to do so, since he had been sleeping on the side of bed that Olivia normally slept on. Nonetheless, Becca had woken him up and she was scared. He carried her into the living room, grabbed the blanket off of the back of the sofa, turned on the TV, and waited for the three year old to fall asleep once more.

She was still asleep- which didn't surprise him. It had been early when she had stumbled into her mother's bedroom and it had taken her nearly a full hour to sleep again once she was lying on the couch. Glancing at the clock on the Cable Box he was surprised to find that it was already after 9 o'clock. He figured Olivia would be awake by then, maybe she was more tired that he had thought.

"Cass...." he whispered, praying that it wouldn't wake Becca up. The girl either couldn't hear him because she was so engrossed in her show or ignored him for the same reason. "Cassandra." he called out again, a little louder than before.

Still no response from the seven year old. So, he waited. Within a few minutes a commercial came on and he very carefully leaned over Becca and tapped the girl on the shoulder. She whirled around to look at him, "Oh... morning."

"Good morning. Where's your mother?"

Her head cocked to one side. "She's at work." she informed him as if it was ludicrous that he hadn't already known so.

"Since when?"

Cassie shrugged, "Awhile now.... She wants you to call her."

He nodded, "I will when your sister wakes up. Have you had anything to eat?"

She nodded, "Cereal."

The TV show came back on, "Alright... go back to what you were doing."

Cassie didn't need to be told twice, she turned around and focused all of her attention to Spongebob.

**XXXX**

It was almost ten o'clock by the time her cell-phone rang. She glanced over at Fin, who was talking with the victim's next-door-neighbor and wordlessly excused herself. When she was a safe distance away she answered it, "Benson."

"Hey, it's me."

"Took you long enough to call," she chided, jokingly. "Listen... I'm going to be here for awhile so if you could make the girls lunch at around noon, and if I'm not home by six order out pizza or something. I'm really sorry."

"Don't be," he told her. "It's not your fault."

"Right... listen, I'm in the middle of an interview. I'll talk to you later?"

"Of course, call me when you're on your way home."

"Ok," she replied. "I love you."

"You too," he hung up and she haded back to talk with their witness.

**XXXX**

It was almost eight o'clock before she finally got home, she was greeted by the smell of Chinese food when she opened the door to her apartment and smiled. Elliot hated Chinese food....

"I'm home," she called out, walking towards the kitchen. She pushed open the door to the kitchen and entered the room, Cassie and Becca were sitting at the table and Elliot was looking for something in the fridge. As casually as she could she walked past him and, making sure that the girls weren't paying attention to her, smacked him on his backside. He jumped slightly and turned around to look at her, grinning wildly. Winking she kept walking past him and grabbed a plate, then proceeded in getting her dinner.

Half an hour later the four of them were sitting in the living room, flipping through the TV channels. Since the girls were still too young to watch the cop dramas that Elliot would normally pick or the horror and suspense movies that Olivia loved they turned to The Cartoon Network, where the Powerpuff Girls was on. Becca squealed happily and Cassie grinned, they loved the show. So for the next half hour, until 8, that was what they watched. Then, at 8 o'clock Olivia tucked Becca in and sent Cassie off to finish her homework, then off to bed at 8:30- when the girl normally fell asleep.

At nine o'clock, when both girls were sound asleep in their room, Elliot and Olivia stretched out on the sofa in the living room and fought over what to watch on TV. They finally agreed to watching American Idol. Neither particularly liked the show, but it was in its very beginning stages, where "America" tries out for the show, and they enjoyed laughing at all the horrible singers who turned out.

When that had become too overwhelmingly annoying they started to flip through the stations once more- nothing on NBC, Jay wouldn't be on until 10:30, nothing on USA, nothing on ABC, Olivia even tried Lifetime or Oxygen and Elliot attempted to persuade her to watch whatever was on Spike TV, but neither would allow a show that catered to one gender so they ended up watching Miracle Pet's on Animal Planet.

Then, finally at 10:30 they flipped the TV back to NBC to watch Jay Leno, Olivia's favorite late-night TV program. Elliot was partial to Late Night with Conan O'Brien, but Jay Leno was alright. They watched Jay until 11:30, whereupon they retired for the night.... In a manner of speaking, that was.

**XXXX**

_One month later:_

"Move in with me," she said one night as they lay in bed. Catching him off-guard.

"What?" he asked, turning so that he could look at her. Did she really just ask him that?

"Move in with me." she repeated, nonchalantly.

Ok- so he had heard her correctly the first time. "You're serious about this?"

"Of course I'm serious about it... why wouldn't I be?" she gave him a strange look. "Elliot, you basically live here anyway... why not just get it over with, move in here, and not have to pay for an apartment you're only at maybe once a week."

He nodded, it made sense. He hardly ever stayed at home anymore. But... wow, moving in with Olivia. He wasn't sure how he would do living with somebody... he had been a bachelor basically his whole life. "Are you sure? This is a really big step."

"I know," she replied. "I think we're ready for it. Don't you?"

"Of course I do," he answered quickly. "It's just... I've never actually lived with somebody before... unless you count boot camp. That doesn't matter, though. I don't know how good at it I'd be."

"Elliot," she began, "you basically live here already. You're great at it. You're wonderful with the girls and you help me around the apartment.... Besides, I'm trying to be greedy here and have you all the time instead of only most of the time." She pouted playfully, "I get lonely when you're gone."

"I'll bet you do," he said with a grin. "...Let me think about this, ok?"

"That's fine. I figured you'd need some time to think first... take all the time you need. As long as you decided to move in when you're done with all that thinking." She smiled and kissed him briefly, "Now, go to bed, it's late."

"Yes Ma'am." he barked, kissing her back before allowing her to cuddle up next to him and drifting off to sleep.

**XXXX**

_Two days later:_

"I've thought about it," Elliot told her cryptically as they sat down at their separate desks at work.

"About what?" she asked, giving him a strange look. The only thing she could think of that he would need to think about were the living situations and he wouldn't bring that up at work... would he?

"What you asked the other night." he replied, ignoring the looks that his partner was giving him.

Alright, so maybe he would bring that up at work. "Oh? ...And, what do you think?"

"I think it's a good idea," he said. She smiled and that was the end of the conversation... at least at that time. They would pick up where they left off at home. _Home_, it sounded so... final now. She got chills thinking about it.

"What's going on here?" Munch postulated, always able to butt his way into something he had no business butting into.

"Nothing that concerns you, Munch." Elliot explained before starting on his paperwork. Munch gave him an expecting look, that wasn't enough information for his conspiracy finding brain.

"And...?"

"And, it doesn't concern you." Elliot repeated.

That was the end of that conversation. Elliot looked over at Olivia and smiled, she smiled back. Fin and Munch were left to look at each other and shrug.... Whatever it was, it was a secret between the two of them and they wouldn't tell anybody about it until they needed to know about it. And, they obviously didn't need to know.

But Munch would figure it out.... There wasn't a secret that he couldn't crack.

**XXXX**

**A/N: I think this one is coming to an end sometime soon. Not sure though... but who knows. Anyway, leave me something sweet! I wanna know what you guys think... even if it's kind of bad. If it's really bad then... please keep it to yourself, only constructive critisism will do ;) (of course, nice reviews are always welcomed!)  
**


	23. Chapter Twenty Three

**Fall to Pieces**

**Chapter Twenty Three**

**Disclaimer: Nah, the show doesn't belong to me. I wish it did, though. And my birthday is only a few months away... I wouldn't mind an early gift- it is my sweet 16, ya know.  
**

**XXXX**

It had been a Tuesday when Elliot decided to move in with Olivia. Instead of staying at her apartment that night, like he normally would have, he went to his own one-bedroom apartment and began to pack his things up. He would sell the old sofa, bedroom set- sans one dresser- as well as all of his appliances. He wouldn't need them anymore, and Olivia's were far better than his anyway. So, the first thing he did was packed all of his clothes into a couple of boxes- the next day after work he brought them over to her apartment.

So, Wednesday night he opted to stay at his apartment again. The quicker he could get everything packed and out of his place the quicker he could officially move into hers. That night he packed all the things from his living room, his DVD's and CD's, along with his books and throw-blankets. Since he got done earlier than he intended he started packing up the bathroom. That only required a small box, all he really needed to bring with him was his razor and shave gel, toothbrush, and the other things he used to groom himself with- Olivia had all the other things he would require.

Thursday, he sold the bed and the dressers he wouldn't be needing. On that same day he sold the couch and love seat, to the same person. Also, he sold the entertainment center on Thursday- which was something that he had been hesitant to part with. But, at the same time, Olivia's was the same size as his was, so it didn't really matter.

Friday, John kept inquiring about what secret they had talked about on Tuesday. He had done so the whole week, but both Olivia and Elliot had successfully managed to ignore him- which was extremely hard. It was Munch they were dealing with, he had a way with interrogating people, he was a cop, for longer than either of them had been. But, by Friday they were both tired of keeping it a secret, there was no real reason for not telling them, anyway. They had been together for a long time, moving in together was just the next step in their relationship. And, Munch was their friend, why not tell him? Yes, he would tease them, but with him that was a given.

So, when the four of them went out for lunch that day and Munch continued to inquire about their secret, Olivia broke. Or, not so much as broke as gave up. "Fine, Munch. Do you really want to know?" she asked, taking a bite of her salad.

He looked at her confused, he hadn't expected her to tell him that easily. "Yeah, why not?"

"Elliot's moving in with me," she told him nonchalantly. "Now... was that worth all the fussing?"

Munch shrugged, "You could have just told me Tuesday and prevented all of my nagging."

"True," Elliot agreed. "But, that wouldn't be any fun for us. Watching you get annoyed for no reason is very entertaining."

"Yeah, yeah." he sighed. "So, you moved in already, or when are you going to?"

"I've been moving in since Tuesday... all I've got to do is finish getting rid of all my things I won't need and we're done. All of my clothes are at her house already. So is everything else I'll need."

"What all do you still need to sell?" Fin asked, speaking for the first time during the whole conversation.

"Appliances and my washer and dryer." Olivia had her own, he had no need for them anymore. Plus, they were fairly old anyway.

Fin nodded, apparently he didn't need either so Elliot was still stuck with things to get rid of. Although, selling an old washer and dryer set in New York City for cheep wouldn't be that hard- somebody was already coming to look at it later that night. As for the appliances, well, he didn't really care if he had to throw away a microwave oven.

They finished eating and went back to the station house, whereupon Munch and Elliot were assigned to a case and Olivia and Fin were left to finish the mountains of paperwork in both of their 'in' stacks. It was going to be a long, long day for both sets of partners.

**XXXX**

Since Elliot was still off with Munch working on their new case Olivia had to bring the girls over to Elliot's apartment for the appointment. The woman was scheduled to come at 7:30 to look at the washer and dryer and as of far it was fifteen after. The girls were becoming impatient, his apartment no longer had a TV to watch or a couch, not even a bed!, to sit on. He had long since gotten rid of the dinning room table, so they were stuck standing up. Except for Becca, who wormed her way into her mother's arms. Olivia knew she was being tricked into holding the girl so she wouldn't have to stand, but she didn't mind.

And, Cassie was a smart cookie, so it didn't take her long to figure out a way to sit down without having to sit on the floor. She simply hopped onto the washing machine. Olivia didn't protest, it was an old and bulky machine so it could no doubt hold the child's small amount of weight. Besides, there wasn't that much time to wait. The woman would be there in ten minutes.

Or five. The buzzer went off at 7:24, and Olivia greeted the woman at the other end. First, though, she made sure it was the right lady and not some psycho off the streets (she was hoping that the woman herself did not fit into that category). A minute later there was a knock at Elliot's door and Olivia let the woman in, balancing Becca on her hip as she used her right hand to open the door.

"Hi," she greeted. "I'm Olivia. Elliot was working so he couldn't be here."

"Oh," the woman, Meghan Bradbury, said. "Alright."

She was young, maybe mid twenties, maybe even early. Her blonde hair fell just below her shoulders and her green eyes were soft. Olivia felt relieved instantly, she half expected some nut to respond to the ad that Elliot had put in the paper. They surely had seen enough cases where somebody did just that.

"The washer and dryer are this way," Olivia informed her as she walked off to the pantry. Thankfully, Cassie was no longer sitting on the washer when they made it in, and Becca was itching to get down and play with her sister. The two ran off to Elliot's empty bedroom and loud giggles followed them.

"Your daughters are beautiful," Meghan complimented. "Are you Elliot's wife?"

Not at the moment. "No, I'm just the girlfriend." she smiled. "I'm divorced...."

"Oh," she said. "Ok. So, for both of them it was how much? 100?"

"$75," Olivia corrected. "There's nothing wrong with them, they've just seen a couple more years than the average washer and dryer. But, he doesn't need them anymore...."

"Oh? Why's that?" Olivia didn't blame the woman for asking. 75 dollars is cheep for a washer and dryer set, even if they were older.

"He's moving into my place, I've already got a set."

She nodded, opening the washer to look inside, then doing the same with the dryer. "I see. Well, I guess I'll take them, then."

"You need help getting them outside?" she asked, they were fairly large, it would take a lot of pushing to get them to the elevator.

"If you don't mind," Meghan said thankfully.

So, for the next half hour, Olivia and Meghan pushed the dryer and the washer through the hallway and to the elevator, and then once they got to the main-floor, out the front door and (after convincing a couple of men passing by to help) getting them into the bed of her boyfriends truck. During that time, Cassandra and Rebecca stayed with Elliot's next door neighbor. An older woman who had watched them once or twice before when Olivia and Elliot had gone out.

It was almost 8:15 by the time they finally left his nearly empty apartment. The only things that were still in it were the fridge (which, had come with the apartment, so would stay there) and a few kitchen appliances that he would take to the pawn shop the next day.

After stopping by a pizza place and getting something to eat they went back to their home, where Olivia put the girls favorite movie, Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey, on. For the next hour and a half, or so, they would be glued to the TV and thus she would have some time to relax. First thing she did, though, was call Elliot.

He answered on the fourth ring, just as she was about to hang up. "Stabler."

"Hey, El." she greeted. "It's me... that woman bought the washer and dryer."

"Good," he said, sighing with relief. "You at home, already?"

"Yep," she replied. "I've got the girls watching a movie, by the time it's over they'll both be passed out asleep." She opened the pizza box and took out a piece, "What time do you think you'll be home?" _Home- their home._ It was still so new to her, she smiled to herself.

"I'm not sure, but probably soon. There's not much else we can get done tonight...."

"Well, I'll wait up for you- then." Pulling open the fridge she grabbed a diet coke and then sat down at the table, "I'm going to let you go, now. See you soon?"

"Hopefully," he answered. "Bye."

She said goodbye and hung up the phone, taking a bite of her pizza. He hadn't stayed at her house in days, which was funny since now they actually _lived_ together. Having grown accustomed to having somebody else in the bed beside her the previous nights she hadn't actually slept much. Tonight she would, though. And every night from then on.

Laughter from the living room caught her attention. The girls knew that Elliot was moving in, although Becca was only three and didn't really know the difference, since for the past couple of months he had been there nearly ever night. Cassie understood though, and she was happy. Which was important to Olivia, Cassie was almost nine, and with Chris gone she would need some kind of father figure in her life. Elliot was perfect for the job.

It worried her a bit though, the rate at which her relationship with Elliot was moving. At first, she had wanted to take things slowly- ease into the relationship. That way they wouldn't end up like she and Chris did. But instead of taking it slower than normal it was moving many times faster than she had expected. It had only been a couple of months and they were already living together! But, she guessed that since they had been best friends for nearly 6 years prior to dating there was no need for the first few stages. They already knew everything about each other, so instead of taking a month or so to find out they just skipped on to the next level and keep going at that speed.

And, who knew where their relationship would be heading next?

**XXXX**

**A/N: Ok, so I'm thinking that this has maybe one or two more chapters in it. Let me know what you think about this one, please! Has anybody else noticed that all my continuing stories end up lasting like at or around 25 chapters? I don't intend on doing that when I start out with my stories- I just thought it was strange.  
**


	24. Chapter Twenty Four

**Fall to Pieces**

**Chapter Twenty Four**

**Disclaimer: Nope, still don't belong to me. Darn... and I thought they would this time.**

**XXXX**

_6 weeks later:_

"Happy birthday to you," Olivia, Elliot, Munch, Fin, and a chorus of girls ranging from the ages of eight to ten (not to mention a certain blonde three year old) sang. "Happy birthday to you... Happy birthday, dear Cassie. Happy birthday to you!" Almost immediately after they were finished with their song the girls began clapping loudly and shouting out what Cassie should wish for when she blew out her candles. The nine year old took it all in with a huge grin, and then without warning took a deep breath and blew the nine candles on her cake out.

"What did you wish for?" Lilianna (Lily) Greg, one of Cassie's classmates and best friend, asked her. Cassie opened her mouth to answer before Fin cut her off.

"She can't tell you," he told Lily, "if she did then she wouldn't get whatever it was."

Cassie's mouth instantly closed, there was no way her wish wasn't going to come true! Lily could just wait until it did to find out what it was. She was patient.

Lily frowned, but nodded all the same. She wanted her friends wish to come true, so she didn't mind waiting. Plus, if she asked Cassie later on she was sure that the girl wouldn't be able to keep it secret for long. Best friends tell each other everything, anyway.

"Alright, who wants cake?" Olivia asked, glancing around the room. Eight hands were thrown into the air, not to mention her own two daughter's hands, and a chorus of 'Ooh, ooh! I do, I do!' filled the air. Olivia couldn't help but smile, it had only been half an hour since the girls had pigged out on pizza and they were still hungry, it was amazing how much one could eat at that age. If she tried that she would surely gain five pounds, maybe even more.

"Ok, ok... birthday girl first, though." she informed them, taking the knife that was sitting next to the sheet cake and looking over at her daughter. "What piece do you want, hon?"

"One with a rose!" she exclaimed. Of course she would want a piece with a rose, there was more icing- ergo, more sugar. Olivia cut one of the end pieces, making sure to keep an entirely intact red rose (Cassie's favorite color) on it, and put it onto a plate which she then handed to Elliot- who was designated the ice-cream man for the time being. "Tell Elliot what kind of ice-cream you want, Cassie."

"Chocolate and Vanilla," she informed him. None of that nasty strawberry ice-cream. She hated strawberry ice-cream. Yuck.

The next person in line for cake was Brooke, the youngest girl (besides Becca) there. She was the only one who was still eight years old, now, since Cassie had been nine for approximately two hours. Olivia cut her a piece, handed the plate to Elliot, who put strawberry and chocolate ice-cream next to the cake on Brooke's request, then handed it to the small girl.

"Enjoy," he told her with a smile. Which only caused Olivia's smile to widen. He was enjoying this. He had been apprehensive about having so many girls over, but he was enjoying it. She was so going to tease him for this. The big softy.

He caught her watching him, "What?"

She shook her head, "Nothing..." Turning back to the line of girls she continued with her job as "cake cutter". Ten minutes later all the girls were gathered in the living room around the TV, watching some nameless cartoon and eating tons and tons of sugar. Olivia was suddenly thankful that Cassie's hadn't requested a sleep-over. Those girls parents would hate her for letting them have so much sugar.

In the kitchen Elliot, Munch, Fin, and Olivia sat around the table, Becca having plopped herself down on her mother's lap and declared it _her_ seat. As if somebody would try and steal it from her.

It was almost six o'clock in the afternoon, the parents of all the girls would be coming soon. Except for Lily's parents. Cassie's one condition on not having a sleep over was that Lily could stay. Olivia didn't mind, Lily was a well-behaved girl- she had stayed over many times.

Like clockwork, at six the parents started lining up at her door. Ten minutes after six only two girls remained in her apartment, Lily and Mya. Heather had already called to inform Olivia that she would be a little late picking Mya up, but she wouldn't be any later than half after. So, while she waited she enjoyed yet another piece of cake.

As promised, Heather arrived ten minutes later, at 6:20. After chatting with Olivia for a few minutes she and Mya took off for their home. Leaving the apartment refreshingly quiet. Becca was passed out on the couch in the living room from too much excitement in one day, Fin and Munch had been gone for a little while, and Cassie and Lily were watching a movie in the bedroom that Cassie and Becca shared. Olivia could finally think without hearing shouts from various girls.

Not wanting to wake Becca up Elliot carried her into his and Olivia's bedroom and let her finish her nap there. Then he and Olivia sat down on the couch in the living room and turned on the TV. After a few minutes Olivia looked over at him and grinned.

"What?" he inquired, wondering what had caused her to smile.

"You had fun today." she accused. "I know you did. I could see it."

"Maybe..." he confessed, "just a little bit."

"I knew you would," she informed him. She scooted closer to him and rested her head on his shoulder, watching as he changed the station from the news to a game. Stifling a groan she pretended to be interested, but they both knew that she wasn't fooling anyone. After checking the score he flipped it back to the news, causing her to grin. Oh yeah, she had him totally wrapped.

**XXXX**

It was nearly eight o'clock when the two nine year olds came out of Cassie's room and wormed their way onto the couch in-between Olivia and Elliot. Becca, who had woken up just after seven was sitting possessively in her mother's lap and would not budge. Of course, that could have been because nobody expected her to, nor wanted her to.

Surprisingly enough Cassie decided that she too wanted to be held, so she climbed into Elliot's lap. He was surprised at first, but then wrapped his arms around her to accommodate her needs. All Olivia could do was smile, they looked so cute. Cassie sat still in his lap for three minutes tops before turning around and whispering something into his ear. Causing not only Olivia, but Becca as well, to look at her with curiosity.

Elliot smiled at whatever she was saying and then in turn whispered something into her ear. Her eyes lit up and she giggled, looking over at Lily, who took Cassie's giggle as something good and cause for her to giggle as well. She whispered back to him and then slid out of his lap, running off towards her bedroom, Lily following close behind her. Olivia threw a questioning look over at Elliot who only shrugged in response.

She huffed, what was so secretive that her daughter couldn't tell her? And, why would Elliot tell her- she was Cassie's mother after all, she did deserve to know what it was.

Looking down at Becca she shrugged, Becca, not knowing what was going on either, shrugged back. If mommy didn't need know what it was then she didn't need to know either.

**XXXX**

_Four months later:_

Olivia couldn't help but laugh as she was twirled around the dance floor. Who ever knew he was such a good dancer?

She had been completely caught off-guard when he suggested they go dancing- it had been ages since she had done so. In fact, the last time had been when she was dating Chris... that was a long time prior. But, as she recalled, this was nothing like when Chris had taken her dancing. Elliot was amazing, she felt like the center of attention, even though everybody else was too busy dancing to pay her any attention.

The song ended and something a bit more reserved came on. Good. It had been awhile since they played a slow song, she was starting to get tired. He pulled her closer to him and she rested her head against his, since she was too tall to lay it on his shoulder without causing her to have a cramp. Not that she minded, her current position was perfectly fine with her. As long as she was close to him it didn't matter.

They had gone out to eat before dancing. Italian, her favorite. There wasn't really a special occasion, it had been over a month since their six month anniversary, Elliot just all of a sudden wanted to go out and do something. So, she had called up Heather and asked if she could babysit. Heather said that yes, she could, bring them on over. Olivia wasn't sure what she would do without her.

The song that was playing was one that she had never heard, but beautiful, even if she wasn't one who normally enjoyed sappy love songs. She couldn't help thinking that it described how she felt most of the time when she thought about her relationship with Elliot. It certainly wasn't anything like her marriage to Chris had been.

_I wonder what God was thinking_

_When He created you_

_I wonder if He knew everything I would need_

_Because He made all my dreams come true_

_When God made you_

_He must have been thinking about me_

Elliot's hold around her waist tightened and she looked at him with a smile. He was thinking the same thing she was.

_I promise that wherever you may go_

_Wherever life may lead you_

_With all my heart I'll be there too_

_From this moment I want you to know_

_I'll let nothing come between us_

_And I will love the ones you love_

_Now gone are all my question about why_

_And I've never been so sure of anything in my life_

When the song ended she pulled out of his embrace and kissed him briefly. "Let's go find somewhere to sit," she suggested. They had been dancing for awhile, her legs were getting tired and her feet were screaming at her for dancing in high-heels. He nodded in agreement and they went off to find a table.

Once they sat down a waitress came up to them and asked them if they wanted anything to drink. Olivia was parched and therefore ordered water, Elliot declined the woman's offer and she went off to get Olivia's water. Not even a minute later she returned with a bottled water and after making sure they didn't need anything else she took off again. She had other people to wait on, of course.

"So," Olivia asked, taking a sip of her water. "Why dancing?"

He shrugged, "I tried to remember when the last time that I went dancing was... and I couldn't. It's been that long. So, I figured why not?"

"I know how you feel, it's been over ten years since I last went dancing..."

"Didn't seem to slow you down any." he observed with a grin.

"Look who's talking," she replied. "Where did you learn to dance like that?"

"You're forgetting I have two older sisters," he supplied. "I learned at an early age how to dance."

"Remind me to thank them some time, then." she grinned. "What's the occasion?"

"No occasion," he assured her. "I just wanted to do something... it's been awhile since we went out."

"We did just last month!"

"Exactly, that's too big a time gap."

She shook her head with a chuckle, "Hey... I'm not complaining. Whenever you feel the need to go to an Italian restaurant and then dancing afterwards just let me know."

Since they were at a booth she was sitting next to him, her hand on his thigh, his arm around her shoulders. She leaned her head against his own shoulder, sighing gently.

"What is it?" he asked, causing her to look up at him.

"Nothing," she shook her head. "This is just a really refreshing surprise, that's all."

"I'm glad you think so," he told her. "Because that's not all."

"We went out to a four star restaurant and then you took me dancing, and you're telling me that's not all?"

"Not hardly," he informed her. "Close your eyes."

"Alright," she moved out of his embrace and faced him, then shut her eyes tightly. "Just tell me when I can open them."

She told him to, but he didn't. Instead when he was ready for her to open her eyes he leaned forward and captured her lips with his own, pulling her closer to him. When he broke the embrace her eyes fluttered open and she looked at him confused.

"Elliot...?" whatever the surprise was, she couldn't see it.

"Do you want to know what Cassie's birthday wish was?" he asked, locking eyes with her.

"Sure..."

"She wished that you and I would get married," he informed her. She was about to reply when he held a hand up to silence her, "Wait a second... let me finish. She told me that when she crawled into my lap that night. She said that she wished I was her daddy, and would her wish ever come true now that she told me? I told her that I had wished for the same thing on my birthday, and hopefully not. Then she told me she loved me before running off to her room. And I gotta tell you, that was probably one of the most important moments of my life. I've always been worried about how the girls would see me since I basically took over their father's place. To know that Cassie approved of our relationship... it really meant a lot to me."

"Elliot–"

"Ah... I'm still not done." He took a deep breath, "I've been waiting for the perfect moment for a while now, and well... this is as good a time as any, I guess." He reached into his pocked, pulled out a small black box, and looked at her with a nervous smile. "Olivia Benson, will you make mine and a very special nine year olds birthday wish come true and marry me?"

She could feel the tears forming behind her eyes, "Can I talk now?" she asked.

He laughed nervously, "Yeah... go ahead."

"Of course I'll marry you!" she exclaimed happily.

He let out a gush of air that he had been holding in due to his anticipation. Taking the ring out of the box he slid it on his finger. It was beautiful. Three square stones, a larger one in the middle, to smaller one's on either side of it. It was perfect. Just like him.

With a grin that she couldn't have suppressed even if she had wanted to, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer to her, crushing his lips against hers. He smiled into the kiss and his hands found their way around her waist. They fit together perfectly. She couldn't have possibly been happier.

It had started when her life had shattered and fallen to pieces- somewhere in the months that had followed they had mixed with the broken parts of his own life, and amazingly enough, just as she had begun to pick up the pieces of her life, so did he. And, in the effort they had found that the broken pieces of her life fit perfectly with his. And she wouldn't have had it any other way.

_THE END_

**XXXX**

**A/N: I'm sorry if the ending sucks. I thought it was ok, I'm just not sure what you guys are gonna think. But anyway, that's the last chapter. I guess there is room for an epilogue, but I don't think I'm gonna write one. **

**Anyway, let me know what you think about it. If you loved it, God bless you. If you hated it, I'm sorry.**

**Oh, if anybody was wondering about the song it's by Natalie Grant and Newsong, and it's called 'When God made you'**


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